Help Tommorow I am seeing my psychiatrist

[Rukia]

Do you think I should tell him I am suicidal? I am not going to mention N just in case...See? I am paranoid...

Is there a story of anyone who got real help at a ward and by help I do not mean stuffing with beznos? And he or she is not suicidal anymore? I was in a psychiatric ward before but the closed wards are not so pleasant, there are some people who are really sick, and some are aggressive too ...

So to sum up I am going tommorow and I am afraid of telling him...so he probably would not change my meds...Maybe I get some Hydroxizine if I am lucky

 

[WinterIsComing]

Why you want to tel him? how is your relationship with him?
In my country they stay in their chairs and listen i can't of doubt they would do that except one psychiatrist tried bucause i cried but before that you had to be questioned and if they think you are stable after the question they do nothing.

 

[Ashpac]

Dont mention the N. Thats the last thing you should do.
Tell him you need your meds and you want to get better with those. If that is your plan.
If you want more meds tell him you are getting worse but still fighting every day as you want to stay alive.
I dont have any experience in psych wards, sorry I cant help.
Good luck for tomorrow.

 

[Conflicted Cat]

Whatever you do just don't tell them about any plan. The second you do, that's when they know you're serious, then they'll lock you up. I mean, unless you're ok with that.

 

[PatKat]

Do you think I should tell him I am suicidal? I am not going to mention N just in case...See? I am paranoid...

Is there a story of anyone who got real help at a ward and by help I do not mean stuffing with beznos? And he or she is not suicidal anymore? I was in a psychiatric ward before but the closed wards are not so pleasant, there are some people who are really sick, and some are aggressive too ...

So to sum up I am going tommorow and I am afraid of telling him...so he probably would not change my meds...Maybe I get some Hydroxizine if I am lucky

I think you should be honest with him/her. That is the only way you can get the actual help you need and want. I have always been honest with mine it just takes me time to trust them. Yes, you should tell him/her you are suicidal imo. Tell them what brought you to that feeling, and what happens along the way. Sadly they will only be able to give you meds, but you can ask for a psychologist referral while you are there. They are the ones who will actually spend time and talk to you about issues, and offer advice and coping skills. I hope it helps you. I wish I could go back to my doctors. :(

The psychiatrist can also be a factor in deciding what level of care you need inpatient, PHP, or IOP if needed. Please be honest with him/her!

 

[Egddios]

So I saw my new primary care doctor yesterday (first appointment); she's actually a Nurse Practioner and young, which appeals to me as she seems more "with the times" and educated/up to date on treatments in general. While I have my physical health somewhat under control, I am falling apart mentally. I told her this and we discussed the possibility of my going back into the psych hospital here for more ECT treatments. I'm not totally "sold" on this idea, it would be more to appease my family. I really don't want to go back into the psych hospital. I of course did not tell the doctor/NP about my specific plans (ie the night night method or that I have the necessary supplies to end my life). Had I told her I would have been taken to the hospital, no doubt. From there, who knows how long I'd be in there and it's not something I'm willing to take a chance on: being totally and brutally honest with a doctor or psychiatrist. I fear being involuntarily medicated, or worse, being placed in the state hospital which is horrendous.

It's unfortunate; how is anyone supposed to "get help" if they can't be completely honest?

 

[GeorgeJL]

Do you think I should tell him I am suicidal? I am not going to mention N just in case...See? I am paranoid...

Is there a story of anyone who got real help at a ward and by help I do not mean stuffing with beznos? And he or she is not suicidal anymore? I was in a psychiatric ward before but the closed wards are not so pleasant, there are some people who are really sick, and some are aggressive too ...

So to sum up I am going tommorow and I am afraid of telling him...so he probably would not change my meds...Maybe I get some Hydroxizine if I am lucky

If you tell him you have N there is a high risk that they will put you into a psychward. If you tell them you have N and you plan on using it, they will put you into a psychward.

Usually they don't lock you up unless you show that you have imminently plans to end your life. But no guarantees.

 

[PatKat]

So I saw my new primary care doctor yesterday (first appointment); she's actually a Nurse Practioner and young, which appeals to me as she seems more "with the times" and educated/up to date on treatments in general. While I have my physical health somewhat under control, I am falling apart mentally. I told her this and we discussed the possibility of my going back into the psych hospital here for more ECT treatments. I'm not totally "sold" on this idea, it would be more to appease my family. I really don't want to go back into the psych hospital. I of course did not tell the doctor/NP about my specific plans (ie the night night method or that I have the necessary supplies to end my life). Had I told her I would have been taken to the hospital, no doubt. From there, who knows how long I'd be in there and it's not something I'm willing to take a chance on: being totally and brutally honest with a doctor or psychiatrist. I fear being involuntarily medicated, or worse, being placed in the state hospital which is horrendous.

It's unfortunate; how is anyone supposed to "get help" if they can't be completely honest?

They also have outpatient ECT you have to have a driver and its Monday, Wednesday, Fridays for however many sessions they think would be best. Check out TMS, and VNS as well. Dr. Mark George at the University of South Carolina - Charleston has been making breakthroughs for ECT, VNS, and TMS.

 

[Soul]

I think I'd say I'm not doing well, and that the meds aren't doing what they should. If s/he asked if I'm having suicidal thoughts I'd probably say "I don't know" and keep talking about something true and related, but not that, if you see what I mean.

 

[Rukia]

Dont worry I will not mention N or this forum because I am paranoid and somehow afraid the doctor may find out about "A" and shut him down...

Thank you guys for all the advice...

My real state of mind: If I had N in the frigde I would probably take it...but maybe I am so courageous for now when I dont have it in reality...
What I am going to tell: I have suicidal thoughts and ideation but no concrete plan...

By any chance is anyone here also schizophrenic? If yes, feel free to PM me...we can exchange about the disease...

 

[eve2004]

If you tell him you have N there is a high risk that they will put you into a psychward. If you tell them you have N and you plan on using it, they will put you into a psychward.

Usually they don't lock you up unless you show that you have imminently plans to end your life. But no guarantees.

Or if you seem unstable and impulsive...
if they suggest it, DO NOT freak out. Stay calm and reason with them that you don't need it (unless you think you do). If your anxiety skyrockets and it shows, that will be even more reason for them to commit you.

I spent 3 h at a psych ward, having to repeat my accidental overdose story over and over to 3 different professionals, and in the report it said I presented with a calm and stable affect, which I'm sure helped my case in getting me out of there quick.

 

[catharticEscapism]

Or if you seem unstable and impulsive...
if they suggest it, DO NOT freak out. Stay calm and reason with them that you don't need it (unless you think you do). If your anxiety skyrockets and it shows, that will be even more reason for them to commit you.

I spent 3 h at a psych ward, having to repeat my accidental overdose story over and over to 3 different professionals, and in the report it said I presented with a calm and stable affect, which I'm sure helped my case in getting me out of there quick.

How did you manage only 3 hours at a psych ward? I tried to be calm and rational a few days after I voluntarily committed myself and it didn't work. In the end, I tried to quote their rules/FAQ at them about how it stated that I was allowed to ask to leave (and should be capable as long as it was voluntary). In the end, they just pink-slipped me and made me stay longer. )8

 

[eve2004]

How did you manage only 3 hours at a psych ward? I tried to be calm and rational a few days after I voluntarily committed myself and it didn't work. In the end, I tried to quote their rules/FAQ at them about how it stated that I was allowed to ask to leave (and should be capable as long as it was voluntary). In the end, they just pink-slipped me and made me stay longer. )8

I had accidentally overdosed on my regular meds by forgetting I had taken them and taken them again later in the day. I was on twice the recommended hightest dose which lowered by seizure threshold so that already didn't help and I did this two days in a row because i waa having a serious migraine so taking big amounts of benzos to try to sleep it off.

I eventually emailed my psych who emailed me back at 10pm and called me to tell me to to go to the Hospital IMMEDIATELY but I'd fallen asleep (with visual hallucinations). I eventually went the next day after more calls from my psych and ended up spending half the day in the ER running blood and cardiac tests, then my psych sent me to the psych ward to be evaluated (though I had insisted it was accidental and it was). They locked up all my belongings, made me wear some blue pants and top with were way too big, and I spent 3 hours sitting there in my minimalist room with the doorknob flat as a pancake to make it harder to run out quickly.

I knew I had to be very calm and appear as normal and as obedient as possible which I did. I'm good at talking myself of things so I had a bit of confidence there. I refused the meal they offered and finally because I appeared otherwise normal and logical they had to let me go... I walked home (over an hour) and vowed to never let it happen again. The key for me is maintaining composure on the outside but thats very hard to do.

In your situation, with the emotional turmoil I don't think it would have been possible... that was an incredibly traumatic thing to go through... sadly not only does the psych ward make most people worse but it heightens their desire to CTB when they leave. Kind of defeats the purpose to be committed unless you are majorly in psychosis of the worst kind, hallucinations, delusions, violent, and unable to even walk on your own.

A better thing maybe would have been to have you consult with a mental health specialist who is compassionate and whose main job to talk to distressed people like you at the hospital (for as long as neccesary), have an appointment set up for the next day to at least have someone to talk to and to listen...

Sadly it doesn't work that way. If it did, more people would vomuntarily consent to going to be able to be heard and calmed down drug-free and leave with resources and way to cope.

 

[catharticEscapism]

I had accidentally overdosed on my regular meds by forgetting I had taken them and taken them again later in the day. I was on twice the recommended hightest dose which lowered by seizure threshold so that already didn't help and I did this two days in a row because i waa having a serious migraine so taking big amounts of benzos to try to sleep it off.

I eventually emailed my psych who emailed me back at 10pm and called me to tell me to to go to the Hospital IMMEDIATELY but I'd fallen asleep (with visual hallucinations). I eventually went the next day after more calls from my psych and ended up spending half the day in the ER running blood and cardiac tests, then my psych sent me to the psych ward to be evaluated (though I had insisted it was accidental and it was). They locked up all my belongings, made me wear some blue pants and top with were way too big, and I spent 3 hours sitting there in my minimalist room with the doorknob flat as a pancake to make it harder to run out quickly.

I knew I had to be very calm and appear as normal and as obedient as possible which I did. I'm good at talking myself of things so I had a bit of confidence there. I refused the meal they offered and finally because I appeared otherwise normal and logical they had to let me go... I walked home (over an hour) and vowed to never let it happen again. The key for me is maintaining composure on the outside but thats very hard to do.

In your situation, with the emotional turmoil I don't think it would have been possible... that was an incredibly traumatic thing to go through... sadly not only does the psych ward make most people worse but it heightens their desire to CTB when they leave. Kind of defeats the purpose to be committed unless you are majorly in psychosis of the worst kind, hallucinations, delusions, violent, and unable to even walk on your own.

A better thing maybe would have been to have you consult with a mental health specialist who is compassionate and whose main job to talk to distressed people like you at the hospital (for as long as neccesary), have an appointment set up for the next day to at least have someone to talk to and to listen...

Sadly it doesn't work that way. If it did, more people would vomuntarily consent to going to be able to be heard and calmed down drug-free and leave with resources and way to cope.

Wow, that sounds like quite the ordeal. D8 I think because accidentally overdosed (and came across as normal), you got off okay. That's really lucky, at least in my POV because most people don't get out once they get in. There was a lady there at the same time I was. She'd voluntarily committed herself because she was seeking resources to help herself and she thought she'd just be in for one day. I told her that, no, once you're in, it's usually a 5 day stint and she flipped her goddamn shit. She went up to the nurses station and asked them and they told her, yep, she's not going to be here for just one day.

Turns out, she had a court hearing the next day to get custody of her kid back. She wasn't just distraught, but she was furious. She later ended up putting her bare foot through the window in her room and escaping past the broken glass shards (they later got a piece of plywood and nailed it up). The nurses didn't know immediately, but when I asked Curtis, he told me he didn't get paid enough to chase after her. I don't know if she ended up getting caught after that, but she didn't end up coming back.

 

[tuto170]

Do you think I should tell him I am suicidal? I am not going to mention N just in case...See? I am paranoid...

Is there a story of anyone who got real help at a ward and by help I do not mean stuffing with beznos? And he or she is not suicidal anymore? I was in a psychiatric ward before but the closed wards are not so pleasant, there are some people who are really sick, and some are aggressive too ...

So to sum up I am going tommorow and I am afraid of telling him...so he probably would not change my meds...Maybe I get some Hydroxizine if I am lucky

What country are you in? In western Europe and America is hard to continuously be prescribed benzos and if you are on anti depressants already they might put on second ones. The worst case scenario to be put on anti psychotic like quatepine or risperidone as they claim to be mood stabilizers.

 

[eve2004]

Also, it makes no sense that a stranger in a psych ward should be able to help you better than your own scared shitless therapist. I think the reason they commit you is because they have a long list of other people/appointments after you that they need to "attend to" ie:collect money from.

 

[Xaphous]

I'll be seeing one again soon. Not even sure why tbh knowing how shit and rigged psychiatry is. Hoping for a diagnosis.

 

[okkkk]

Do you think I should tell him I am suicidal? I am not going to mention N just in case...See? I am paranoid...

Is there a story of anyone who got real help at a ward and by help I do not mean stuffing with beznos? And he or she is not suicidal anymore? I was in a psychiatric ward before but the closed wards are not so pleasant, there are some people who are really sick, and some are aggressive too ...

So to sum up I am going tommorow and I am afraid of telling him...so he probably would not change my meds...Maybe I get some Hydroxizine if I am lucky

In my experience, the psych is more indifferent to your feelings. I think they are looking at your symptoms in a purely clinical way. The more nuanced feelings are for your therapist or at least a psychologist.

I was also prescribed hydroxyzine. It really does nothing for me in terms of anxiety. It just helps me to sleep as long as I take 30mg or above. It also makes me super groggy when I wake up. Id prefer a benzo in panic situations. Though im becoming less and less faithful in prescription medicine. A lot of my problems would be fixed if I confronted my fears more consistently. Though not sweating and sinking into panic would be nice.

 

[azucaramargo]

They also have outpatient ECT you have to have a driver and its Monday, Wednesday, Fridays for however many sessions they think would be best. Check out TMS, and VNS as well. Dr. Mark George at the University of South Carolina - Charleston has been making breakthroughs for ECT, VNS, and TMS.

@PatKat, are you in SC as well?