T

toolateforme

Student
Jul 2, 2018
158
My family's fucked up and so am I. I'm the only one who can save myself and there's no way out. They will probably do the same afterwards because they're just like me in the worst way - they will be forced to take the masks off once I succeed.

I wish there was a way out, but accepting my fate makes this a lot easier, and understandable. I can keep telling myself "if only I hadn't...", but there's no way I would have known. I can't tell the future. And I can't ever take back the past. Hell, even if I had acted differently I'd probably still end up here because of the way I am. So, here I am. I know I've accepted what's to come, because I'm not even sad.

The world isn't meant for everyone, and that's okay.
 
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Bulletwbttrflywings

Bulletwbttrflywings

My soul is awakened... and I’m f*cked
May 29, 2019
244
My family's fucked up and so am I. I'm the only one who can save myself and there's no way out. They will probably do the same afterwards because they're just like me in the worst way - they will be forced to take the masks off once I succeed.

I wish there was a way out, but accepting my fate makes this a lot easier, and understandable. I can keep telling myself "if only I hadn't...", but there's no way I would have known. I can't tell the future. And I can't ever take back the past. Hell, even if I had acted differently I'd probably still end up here because of the way I am. So, here I am. I know I've accepted what's to come, because I'm not even sad.

The world isn't meant for everyone, and that's okay.
Hugs...
 
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K

Karangel25

Experienced
Mar 9, 2019
206
I feel you
 
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LaBrava

LaBrava

Experienced
May 5, 2019
265
Is there a way to separate yourself from your family?
 
F

fisil

Arcanist
Mar 9, 2019
432
I could relate to some of your post. Sucks that you you dropped your parents to late or realizied things to late. Good luck.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
I wish the world were a compassionate place. I'm sorry you've been struggling. Whatever choice you make I wish you the best possible outcome for you. Journey well
 
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T

toolateforme

Student
Jul 2, 2018
158
I wish the world were a compassionate place. I'm sorry you've been struggling. Whatever choice you make I wish you the best possible outcome for you. Journey well

Me too. The world needs a lot more genuine compassion, not the fake kind you'll find in a lot of people. Maybe I wouldn't be here if I had some
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
Maybe you can do what my last "girlfriend" did?

she was adopted and her "family" gave their back when the economic situation turn out bad...
I couldn't offer her the money to live with me, i offered her my house, and food, but no more....

she went very sad to baby-sitting in Canada.... she met the "uncle" of the babies she was looking to take care...
fell in love....
and now she's living a great life in Canada, they went living together,,, could you separate from your family like that?
 
T

toolateforme

Student
Jul 2, 2018
158
Maybe you can do what my last "girlfriend" did?

she was adopted and her "family" gave their back when the economic situation turn out bad...
I couldn't offer her the money to live with me, i offered her my house, and food, but no more....

she went very sad to baby-sitting in Canada.... she met the "uncle" of the babies she was looking to take care...
fell in love....
and now she's living a great life in Canada, they went living together,,, could you separate from your family like that?

I wish. Even if I separated from my family my condition prevents me from getting a new life on my own.
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
I wish. Even if I separated from my family my condition prevents me from getting a new life on my own.
wow, im so so sorry girl, then you must be in a very sad place where no options are available...
im battling with ctb desires myself, im deciding day by day to continue ( I woke up at 3am thinking it was a great time to drink my N)

I'm physically okay, are you physically okay too? <--- thats important I think
 
Extremly kind <3

Extremly kind <3

Student
Jun 8, 2019
192
My family's fucked up and so am I. I'm the only one who can save myself and there's no way out. They will probably do the same afterwards because they're just like me in the worst way - they will be forced to take the masks off once I succeed.

I wish there was a way out, but accepting my fate makes this a lot easier, and understandable. I can keep telling myself "if only I hadn't...", but there's no way I would have known. I can't tell the future. And I can't ever take back the past. Hell, even if I had acted differently I'd probably still end up here because of the way I am. So, here I am. I know I've accepted what's to come, because I'm not even sad.

The world isn't meant for everyone, and that's okay.
I hope I had the time machine like the one in "Back to the future" series just to correct one wrong decision that had fucked up my life forever making me resorting to CTB at the earliest:(
 
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T

toolateforme

Student
Jul 2, 2018
158
wow, im so so sorry girl, then you must be in a very sad place where no options are available...
im battling with ctb desires myself, im deciding day by day to continue ( I woke up at 3am thinking it was a great time to drink my N)

I'm physically okay, are you physically okay too? <--- thats important I think

Yeah I have no options but honestly I'm okay with it. It's strangely easy to accept once you recognize you cannot change the past.

I'm physically okay, yes. Mentally, no (clearly).
I hope I had the time machine like the one in "Back to the future" series just to correct one wrong decision that had fucked up my life forever making me resorting to CTB at the earliest:(

Boy me too!!!!
 
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dandan

dandan

One more attempt on life.
Feb 18, 2019
1,298
Surely me too.... if I could go back and change just 1 decision!!
 
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W

WaterUnder

Student
Apr 27, 2019
197
Dolce:
Please don't tell me that I missed you!

You know, Love, I still think you're alive. Fucked up beyond belief at the moment, but here. And I'm praying that while you're looking down from that bridge (wherever you are), you're finding your worth and backing out. There are other options we can discuss.

Hang on.
 
Kjo

Kjo

Student
Jun 7, 2019
148
Me too. The world needs a lot more genuine compassion, not the fake kind you'll find in a lot of people. Maybe I wouldn't be here if I had some
I relate so much. It always makes me think of the quote:
"Be the change you want to see in the world."
 

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