Aponia & Ataraxia
Experienced
- Jun 24, 2018
- 233
Upon acquiring all of your critical substances / equipment / travel money: Are you planning on leaving a note, or are you planning on utterly rocketing from this lower plane / making a bee-line for the nearest emergency exit?
*Anecdotal experiences: Having philosophically equated oblivion to deep dreamless sleep, every passing morning greets me with a spike of utter despair during the first ten seconds of waking up.
My first attempt was aborted, and as of now my actual end frame is on track for a 120-day delay... for those of you who have not yet attempted: make sure you've made a black & white decision on whether to stay or go, and orchestrate a damn good plan the first time. ...I recall hearing the term 'limbo' in the reddit days, which is slang for the experience of an intervening time delay between attempts and/or being on the fence about cutting one's experience short. ...'limbo' is pretty real, and it absolutely sucks. Fortunately, suicide euphoria is also real. That being said, it seems as though each botched attempt (failed or aborted) is anecdotally likely to have a negative effect on your suicide euphoria and/or ideation euphoria (which are invaluable when it comes to orchestration & execution) while simultaneously almost guaranteeing one an encounter with 'limbo' --the experiencing of which, should be on the suicidal individual's list of the top 5 things worth avoiding.
*Anecdotal experiences: Having philosophically equated oblivion to deep dreamless sleep, every passing morning greets me with a spike of utter despair during the first ten seconds of waking up.
My first attempt was aborted, and as of now my actual end frame is on track for a 120-day delay... for those of you who have not yet attempted: make sure you've made a black & white decision on whether to stay or go, and orchestrate a damn good plan the first time. ...I recall hearing the term 'limbo' in the reddit days, which is slang for the experience of an intervening time delay between attempts and/or being on the fence about cutting one's experience short. ...'limbo' is pretty real, and it absolutely sucks. Fortunately, suicide euphoria is also real. That being said, it seems as though each botched attempt (failed or aborted) is anecdotally likely to have a negative effect on your suicide euphoria and/or ideation euphoria (which are invaluable when it comes to orchestration & execution) while simultaneously almost guaranteeing one an encounter with 'limbo' --the experiencing of which, should be on the suicidal individual's list of the top 5 things worth avoiding.