Venting Tired

[Ella Disenchanted]

It's one of those days where I desperately need an out. The ability to hold it all back has gone and I have the opportunity. With the suicidal dissociation, I get waves of overwhelming exhaustion. Do I take my chance or try to sleep it off.. I really don't know. I'm tired to my very core. I know that much.

I feel like I don't want to go another minute let alone another day. On the other hand I feel like I could sleep for a week. I'm conflicted but that conflict makes me feel even more tired.

 

[Retched]

I understand more than I possibly could explain.

 

[ThinkingAboutThis]

I understand so well, too. I cannot live in this fear much longer. Something has to give.

 

[SiArc]

I totally get it. The only thing keeping me here is I have a specific time and date to ctb. I am not quite done prepping my sacred space either. But as soon as the time comes I will be going.

 

[ThinkingAboutThis]

Bad weather today. Heavy rains and winds. It created a fear of unreal magnitude. It's a bit bette now, but after going through 3 hours of horrific fear that cannot be controlled, I really kept wondering if I am recovering or getting worse. It's hard.

 

[Jenna]

I am right there with you. I'm trying to hang in there as long as I can and get things ready plus prepare my family as best I can.