TheGoodGuy
Visionary
- Aug 27, 2018
- 2,999
TLDR; I just feel like time stopped back in 2012-2014 I got apathy in 2014 that got worse by each passing year, I had no social life anymore or care for love or hobbies not even smoking weed all because of apathy and it feels to me as if music from that era was the last to be released because when I listen to it now I feel like these songs literally just came out the same with certain games e.g. battlefield 4, GTA V, CS GO yet it was so long ago
I have had apathy for 5 years now that has gotten worse by each passing year now I really don´t feel anything but to me it also feels like time just stopped after 2012-2014 my life was over at that point I had lost all my friends from my teenage years I also think it´s important to say I was very addicted to Cannabis, from when I was 16 I smoked on and off in my off times I would bodybuild but the point with saying this is in 2014 I stopped smoking weed and I used to relapse and start smoking again for several years because nostalgia would hit me so hard especially on the days I called "relapse days" it´s usually on nice sunny days like a cool sunny day in autumn but for years I haven´t been able to feel that feeling anymore because I can´t feel emotions at least when I had depression I could feel it since nostalgia is a mixture between happiness and sadness and I haven´t been able to feel either for 5 years.
I tried smoking weed a year ago to try and recreate the feeling of my youth even the addiction part but I didn´t feel any emotions now I only got anxiety from it I then got kind of mad and desperately tried to get the feeling back by smoking every night for like a week but I still didn´t feel anything and I used to smoke so much that I would smoke a bowl on my bong every 30-45 minutes.
The point with this is that my life completely stopped back in 2012-2014 from then on there would be no more memorable experiences in my life not love (stopped caring about my looks because of apathy) and I had no friends anymore and because of apathy I have lost interest in anything that probably explains why I feel so many things like music, games and stuff like that just came out even though it was 5-7 years ago like the songs in the spoiler below.
I mean it literally feels like these songs just came out especially 'Swedish House Mafia Dont You Worry Child' since I feel nostalgic about that song I remember back when I heard that song what I was going through at the time but other songs like Katy Perry´s Roar or Dark horse I feel as if they came out recently but it´s been like 5-6 years that is completely insane to me I can´t even begin to understand where the time went I know the Swedish house mafia song was some time ago but not fucking 7 years!
And when Miley Cyrus Wrecking Ball came out I couldn´t believe my own eyes it was like the ultimate realization that not only her young teenage years were gone but mine too it felt like I lost a piece of me I know it sounds cheesy but that is how I felt I miss my youth so much and I watched her in Hannah Montana and still listen to those songs all the time and I guess I am just a man child that can´t accept that I will never be young again.
Also especially video games scares me to think about how old some of them are even though I feel like they just got released like Battlefield 4 which was the last Battlefield game I bought and I have been playing Battlefield since Battlefield 2, Bad Company 2, Battlefield 3 and of course Battlefield 4 and to think there have been released two new battlefield games (not including Hardline) it just mindboggling. It´s been 6 year since Battlefield 4 came out I can´t comprehend that because I still feel like it´s the last Battlefield game to be released and if I were to jump back in the game (like I have tried a few times the last years) I can´t understand how there are 2-3 more Battlefield games it doesn´t feel that way to me time really feel frozen back between 2012-2014
Also when I think of GTA V it feels like it came out maybe a year ago but it too came out 6 years ago
Anyone feel the same way as if time just stopped all those years ago? I even have this pic I found a while ago.
I have had apathy for 5 years now that has gotten worse by each passing year now I really don´t feel anything but to me it also feels like time just stopped after 2012-2014 my life was over at that point I had lost all my friends from my teenage years I also think it´s important to say I was very addicted to Cannabis, from when I was 16 I smoked on and off in my off times I would bodybuild but the point with saying this is in 2014 I stopped smoking weed and I used to relapse and start smoking again for several years because nostalgia would hit me so hard especially on the days I called "relapse days" it´s usually on nice sunny days like a cool sunny day in autumn but for years I haven´t been able to feel that feeling anymore because I can´t feel emotions at least when I had depression I could feel it since nostalgia is a mixture between happiness and sadness and I haven´t been able to feel either for 5 years.
I tried smoking weed a year ago to try and recreate the feeling of my youth even the addiction part but I didn´t feel any emotions now I only got anxiety from it I then got kind of mad and desperately tried to get the feeling back by smoking every night for like a week but I still didn´t feel anything and I used to smoke so much that I would smoke a bowl on my bong every 30-45 minutes.
The point with this is that my life completely stopped back in 2012-2014 from then on there would be no more memorable experiences in my life not love (stopped caring about my looks because of apathy) and I had no friends anymore and because of apathy I have lost interest in anything that probably explains why I feel so many things like music, games and stuff like that just came out even though it was 5-7 years ago like the songs in the spoiler below.
I mean it literally feels like these songs just came out especially 'Swedish House Mafia Dont You Worry Child' since I feel nostalgic about that song I remember back when I heard that song what I was going through at the time but other songs like Katy Perry´s Roar or Dark horse I feel as if they came out recently but it´s been like 5-6 years that is completely insane to me I can´t even begin to understand where the time went I know the Swedish house mafia song was some time ago but not fucking 7 years!
And when Miley Cyrus Wrecking Ball came out I couldn´t believe my own eyes it was like the ultimate realization that not only her young teenage years were gone but mine too it felt like I lost a piece of me I know it sounds cheesy but that is how I felt I miss my youth so much and I watched her in Hannah Montana and still listen to those songs all the time and I guess I am just a man child that can´t accept that I will never be young again.
Also especially video games scares me to think about how old some of them are even though I feel like they just got released like Battlefield 4 which was the last Battlefield game I bought and I have been playing Battlefield since Battlefield 2, Bad Company 2, Battlefield 3 and of course Battlefield 4 and to think there have been released two new battlefield games (not including Hardline) it just mindboggling. It´s been 6 year since Battlefield 4 came out I can´t comprehend that because I still feel like it´s the last Battlefield game to be released and if I were to jump back in the game (like I have tried a few times the last years) I can´t understand how there are 2-3 more Battlefield games it doesn´t feel that way to me time really feel frozen back between 2012-2014
Also when I think of GTA V it feels like it came out maybe a year ago but it too came out 6 years ago
Anyone feel the same way as if time just stopped all those years ago? I even have this pic I found a while ago.
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