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Toxic Positivity

Toxic Positivity

At my own pace
Feb 11, 2022
93
A vital component of my depression is that I am the pilot of a body I find unappealing, unremarkable, flawed and weak.

"Besides, it is a disgrace to grow old through sheer carelessness before seeing what manner of man you may become by developing your bodily strength and beauty to their highest limit. But you cannot see that, if you are careless; for it will not come of its own accord."

-Socrates, quoted by Xenophon in Memorabilia Book 3, Chapter 12

This is exactly the vague feeling I live every day, given textual description. I would truly, truly hate to grow old without first enjoying a body that can be called beautiful without any cognitive behavioral twist that reframes physically mundane non-beauty into something better than what's actually there.

The problem, until now, is that my efforts to achieve a better form haven't lasted at all. In my 20's, there were periods where I was athletic and felt attractive, but I could never hold onto it for very long. I would like to regain that feeling, and hold onto it for longer than I did then.

What's required of me is not any intense, short-term transformation, but an overall reorientation of my entire decision-making process. As much of a buzzword as it is, I need something holistic, grounded, and sustainable if I ever hope to make meaningful changes in how I feel about my body.

I will leave this thread as a place for your thoughts on the matter, and hopefully, will have some updates about what I've learned at a later point.
 
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Hollowman

Empty
Dec 14, 2021
1,121
I've been wanting to get back in shape and feel better but it's so difficult when I can't see a decent future.
 
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pollux

pollux

Knight of Infinite Resignation
May 24, 2024
100
I often try to get into shape but I usually drop the effort after a few weeks. I think it's probably best to start small, without caring about being optimal, just to get the habit going.

I've been trying again this past month and I think I have been moderately successful. Focusing on getting lean first, even though I don't have much weight, since it requires less effort overall. After I get to a level I want I plan on getting more muscle mass. Seems to be a decent plan I think.
 
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ConfusedClouds

Experienced
Mar 9, 2024
203
Sorry this ended up being damn long. Hopefully there is something helpful for someone here.

TLDR; starting up is real hard, here are a few tactics I have found that have then helped me stick to exercise regularly to basically prevent me from having to painfully 'start from scratch' again.



For me I seem to have picked up a few 'tactics' that have helped me start getting active and keep going. I'll share them below in case any of them feel helpful. I agree that not being able to see the/any future makes it super hard to get started, so these maybe apply more to the phases of 'keeping going' once I've made the jump and got started (often from random external events/motivators and/or impulses)

* routine is a key here - I personally have found that the times I don't feel like it, if I just do/force a 'maintenance' session then I don't feel so bad like I've broken the commitment. This could be walking instead of jogging or lifting the same/lower weights (not 'progressing'). Whatever 'regression' of the session is relevant to you but that means your body still does the specific movements and so if the next week you are super keen again you can progress to faster/harder/stronger without having to start from scratch.

* Focussing on both exercise AND diet was always TOO MUCH for me. I have found that by just focussing on keeping up a regular exercise routine (talking 1-2 sessions a week to start) then over time I naturally found I wanted to eat better so I didn't feel sluggish for my planned exercise. I also naturally found I wanted to do more sessions. Again, not always doing 'extras', but always keeping up those minimum core/base sessions

* I don't remember where I got this from, nor whether it is factually correct, but it has helped me and my motivation so I use it! "It takes half the time to lose fitness than it took to gain it". Sounds pretty frustrating; after 3 weeks of training, you'd be back to square 1 in just 1.5 weeks. BUT I use this to my advantage. Especially those super tough weeks 2-4 before a routine has established and just as the aches and pains are only starting to ease. Essentially I know if I just turn up and do my planned base exercise sessions each week for a few weeks, then afterwards if I miss one then its not all lost. And the longer I keep up my routine, the less an impact missing a week (e.g to something out of my control) would have on my fitness and knowing I'd be able to pick up where I left off again.

* "it never gets easier, you just get stronger/faster" - especially before weeks 3/4, before I can feel those initial improvements, feels like I am so weak lifting or could be walking faster than I am jogging. But after a bit of time, suddenly although its still tough, the weights/distances are going up or the times/aches are going down and endorphins begin to show up more.

* I get overwhelmed by the amount of options I could chose, so I have removed any thinking and stick to an autopilot routine. I have a weights session/routine that I never change, so I don't have to think other than whether I'm pushing more or sticking to what I lifted last week or dropping down a bit. Then I use the classes at my gym where the instructor puts together the session with variety and I just turn up and do whatever exercises they say, zero thinking. And usually music that I zone out to and do the exercises rhythmically to the beat to just get them done!

I wish the initial start up wasn't so hard. Both physically and an element of 'why bother'/'whats the point'. Possibly why I have built the above 'strategies' to keep my base level going no matter what so I don't have to 'start' again - its very much an autopilot activity for me now that I don't question which kills a chunk of time when I am exercising and is a part of the week I don't have to go through any overwhelming decision making!
 
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