yellowhue
Dancing along the razor's edge...
- Nov 1, 2021
- 12
Everything is worse now. I'm in recovery from addiction, and I thought I was finally seeing the 'the light'. Nope... my mistakes from the past, things I'd had never done while sober, are catching up with me. It's only a matter of time before my family hates me, my one reason to live. On the flip side, I guess at least that'll make it easier to CTB, right?
I'm thinking I'm going to try shallow water blackout with alcohol. I failed before, but it's literally just because I got impatient and kept drinking shots too fast - I was supposed to space them 30 minutes apart or something. This time I'm going to play a timer.. which kinda sucks, because I really wanna jam out and listen to my favorite albums before I die, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Maybe I'll get a cheapo separate mp3 player or something, I don't wanna make my death unpleasant.
Oddly specific I know, but is anyone else here due to their past catching up with them when they finally thought things were getting better?
I'm thinking I'm going to try shallow water blackout with alcohol. I failed before, but it's literally just because I got impatient and kept drinking shots too fast - I was supposed to space them 30 minutes apart or something. This time I'm going to play a timer.. which kinda sucks, because I really wanna jam out and listen to my favorite albums before I die, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Maybe I'll get a cheapo separate mp3 player or something, I don't wanna make my death unpleasant.
Oddly specific I know, but is anyone else here due to their past catching up with them when they finally thought things were getting better?