This site

[headinghome]

I found this site after searching for suicide information online… I seriously attempted to take the suffering away by killing myself with drugs about six months ago… I'm a mature adult who suffered an injury to my foot over a year ago… before this I was a perfectly functional human being… Yes I had issues… But that's what being a human being is… However what I always did have was my mobility and independence… No matter what-I could count on that I could count on myself… I had a good life...I'm married..I have friends and I was looking forward to doing things with the rest of my life… But this injury has compromised my independence and my mobility and I don't wanna live like this… I suffer every day..all I want is to end this suffering and right now I feel like I wish I had never been born..that I would give up everything not to have these feelings of torture and hell… And the fact that my friends and family think it's simply a matter of talking to someone… or trying pills which I have done ..but none of this helped...Is almost the worst thing....No one seems to want to believe that I don't want to...nor should I be forced to live in this horribly compromised condition… Of course there are many people that physically have it worse than me and choose to go on....But this is their choice… And my choice should be respected and allowed and facilitated in a pain-free and dignified way.
I know there is a lot of suffering by people on this site.... and I know there are so many more unheard voices...people that can't write or don't have access to a computer…who truly want to go...older people with no real voice...people who are dying and suffering who could be helped by the medical profession... from my observation it seems like there are many who feel like they have a horrible life emotionally… And I know how that beats you down… and you might believe there are insurmountable walls or obstacles and that nothing will ever be better… I'm truly sorry that you are feeling this way and have to go through your own hell… I would only offer my humble words of encouragement.... be glad that you can walk or that you can drive or that you have your independence even if you feel the world is beating you down… This full physical life is truly a gift ... I never in 1 million years imagined I would be in this condition… I don't want anyone to suffer emotionally physically spiritually… It's all horrible… All I know is if I had my body back I would be eternally grateful…

 

[Walilamdzi]

What kind of injury is it? I think that it's understandable that losing your mobility would cause you to feel like this...

 

[headinghome]

What kind of injury is it? I think that it's understandable that losing your mobility would cause you to feel like this...

broke ankle and serious soft tissue damage..now horrible bone loss and decreased mobility..unable to do much but "hobble" around... do not want to take those horrible poison drugs for bones… Also tried at least four antidepressants they were useless and one of them gave me seizures… I have nothing to say to a shrink other than… Please let me die…

 

[Walilamdzi]

Can you do physiotherapy or anything? Sorry that you're going through this. Yeah, it baffles me how people think talking to someone can solve problems when the problems are due to circumstances like this.

 

[NotSure]

It almost seems like a prosthetic could be a better option. The technology they have now they can basically make you a cyborg... seems like there may be some better options you may need to look into. I'm sorry for your pain, but exhaust all your options, if nothing else for your family

 

[headinghome]

It almost seems like a prosthetic could be a better option. The technology they have now they can basically make you a cyborg... seems like there may be some better options you may need to look into. I'm sorry for your pain, but exhaust all your options, if nothing else for your family

None of these are options.....

 

[NotSure]

None of these are options.....

Are they not able to amputate and reconstruct it?

 

[headinghome]

Are they not able to amputate and reconstruct it?

It's not mangled it just doesn't move like a normal foot and therefore it doesn't allow free mobility or motion I don't want to live in this compromised state… would you want to hobble around not being able to drive or do things that you used to be able to do

 

[NotSure]

It's not mangled it just doesn't move like a normal foot and therefore it doesn't allow free mobility or motion I don't want to live in this compromised state… would you want to hobble around not being able to drive or do things that you used to be able to do

No, not at all, and I understand what that puts you through. I'm just wondering if you can ask them to go through other options that can get you some mobility back. They shouldn't mind, because it's money for them. They may have just gave you the most cost efficient one at the time, since it's not mangled, but if you have insurance and a doctor to discuss alternatives with, might be worth the talk.