Thinking about leaving

[hmnow]

Do you ever get to a moment that you feel your time is up

 

[Praestat_Mori]

My time's only up bc of external circumstances. As long as my life is good I wouldn't wanna leave early.

 

[bgh3192]

All the time. My mind tells me the only way to get relief from constant anxiety is to CTB. Unfortunately, I realized today that's CTB isn't a viable option at least in the near future. I feel like "my get out of jail, free" card has been taken away.
Anything in particular, that you feel like sharing, made you feel your time is up? Or, just a general realization, hmnow?

 

[3rdworldsadness]

Absoulately. Its better to die than live this hell. I'm always searching for a more comfortable death. But every method seems kinda difficult. I wish i wasn't this pussy and actually did it a long time ago.

 

[FuneralCry]

I always feel like that as I just don't want to suffer in this dreadful, torturous existence I just always saw as a mistake rather all I want is peace and for me only non-existence can bring me any peace from the dreadful, cruel abomination of existence that just causes harm and suffering with no limit as to how much one can be tortured.

I'll just always see existence as the problem no matter what, it's one that just causes so much futile, unnecessary suffering and problems there were never a need for, I find it terrifying how a human can exist for decades longer just to be tortured in agony from old age, all I want is peace from it all, I only wish to escape from this deeply undesirable existence that just leads to decay and death anyway.

 

[NutOrat]

I feel like I'm on a timer now. I must succeed this time, or I may never get another chance. It's gonna be hard, but I don't think I can keep going much longer.

 

[braintorture]

I can't project myself past 2026. I usually always can project myself in the future.

I already made peace with death and I'm ready, it's only a matter of time now.

 

[Macedonian1987]

I think my time was up years ago. I am still here in this world just because of my parents. They sort of force me to stay. If it weren't for them I would've left 10 years ago.

 

[bFre3]

I'm surprised I'm still here today.
I told myself I would be gone months ago.

I'm not sure if I ever felt that it was 'time', but I do feel like currently, I would be comfortable with leaving anytime. Or at least, that's what I tell myself.

 

[closetoyou]

Kind of. I've been feeling that a bit recently. Mind - I am still young, but it feels like I'm getting to *that point*. I'm 24, turning 25 pretty soon, and feel behind in a lot aspects in my life. I've got a degree, studying something else, have had jobs in the past, I've got a license - I've got a lot of the 'adult' shit down, but I just feel behind in things that feel set in stone. I feel unable to connect to my surroundings, people, etc. I see relationships blossom everywhere, and I'm stuck picking for details in the surface with no way of digging deeper. I'm losing friends, family - and the effort to improve and to not just drown in it all doesn't feel worth it at times. I feel fundamentally fucked - immature, but it's true. At least it feels like it.

I feel like I got close this year, closer than I ever thought I would to just letting it all pass. IDK. It's weird. A few days back I wanted to get SN and was scared of next year, and now I'm still confused but not entirely sure if I want to end it - every little slightly positive moment with a family member, a joke you read online, just slowly reeling you back in, even if it'll probably all explode in my face sooner or later.

Maybe things will get better, maybe they won't, But I always thought 'I have suicidal thoughts but I'd never do it', up until this year. Eventually you just reach that breaking point, I suppose.

 

[itsgone2]

My time is definitely up. But how to be gone is the issue

 

[whybother2002]

Unfortunately yes, I've hit the point of no return.

 

[Izz]

I feel like I have died already. My body just needs to catch up.

 

[darksouls]

my time is up because of my poor health, my life is only suffer

 

[yzzzy]

Do you ever get to a moment that you feel your time is up

I do feel it. Honestly I'm done but I've yet to find an way to end my life. I've thought about it and even tried doing it many times during the last three years. All my efforts were unsuccessful. If I could have an way to end my life I'm not gonna be here for one second anymore. I have No words to describe myself