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Jonnydoeuk

Member
Aug 4, 2018
67
Have my three disposable barbecues packed in the boot of my car , bricks to put them on once the seats are down, matches important, duct tape for the windows and the vents , Valium and some jack Daniels for some Dutch courage - plan to drive to the heart of natural beauty surrounding by the mountains , lakes and wildlife - wish me luck

Death the word trepidatious springs to mind
 
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ephemeral

Member
Jul 10, 2018
43
Death the word trepidatious springs to mind

Who wouldn't be, before such a grand voyage. You prepared well. Trust yourself. Godspeed.
 
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Mecha Man

Experienced
Jul 16, 2018
230
See you in the afterlife! *waves*
 
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RoloTomasi

RoloTomasi

Specialist
Jul 21, 2018
319
Goodluck man!
 
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nasblue

Member
Jul 14, 2018
92
I've been there, but couldn't do it.
I hope you make the right choice anyway.
Good luck.
 
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nasblue

Member
Jul 14, 2018
92
What you've been there with the charcoal method ?? What happened couldn't you go through with it
Yes, I had it all planned out and had all the materials.
I just couldn't bring myself to do it mentally.
 
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nasblue

Member
Jul 14, 2018
92
What was it the waiting period before death ? I imagine that could be a hindrance but if the dude has Valium that may put him in a relaxed state of manner maybe fall asleep guess you got to be determined

What would be your other option
CO is still my method of choice. I didn't even get to taking the pills and preparing the coals.
 
Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
:'( it's been nice taking to you and thankyou for your advice.
I hope everything goes as you planned and you have a smooth and peaceful exit.xx
 
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K

Karenbaker

Member
Jun 17, 2018
63
Have my three disposable barbecues packed in the boot of my car , bricks to put them on once the seats are down, matches important, duct tape for the windows and the vents , Valium and some jack Daniels for some Dutch courage - plan to drive to the heart of natural beauty surrounding by the mountains , lakes and wildlife - wish me luck

Death the word trepidatious springs to mind
Well you still have time to change your mind as I say I'm not an advocate on this site for encouraging others to ctb I'd much rather them see if they can solve out their problems ?? Besides charcoal methods isbt a proven method of death there's so much that can go wrong let alone brain damage ?? Is that what you want to see if you fail being disabled ?? It would be nice if a few others would disencourage you
 
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Jonnydoeuk

Member
Aug 4, 2018
67
:'( it's been nice taking to you and thankyou for your advice.
I hope everything goes as you planned and you have a smooth and peaceful exit.xx
Thanks Laura stay strong for the boy xx
 
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nasblue

Member
Jul 14, 2018
92
Well you still have time to change your mind as I say I'm not an advocate on this site for encouraging others to ctb I'd much rather them see if they can solve out their problems ?? Besides charcoal methods isbt a proven method of death there's so much that can go wrong let alone brain damage ?? Is that what you want to see if you fail being disabled ?? It would be nice if a few others would disencourage you
There are thousands of reported deaths with CO. Brain damage can happen with any method if you're discovered early. CO poisoning is a scientifically proven, lethal phenomenon. Stop spreading misinformation.
 
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RoloTomasi

RoloTomasi

Specialist
Jul 21, 2018
319
Have my three disposable barbecues packed in the boot of my car , bricks to put them on once the seats are down, matches important, duct tape for the windows and the vents , Valium and some jack Daniels for some Dutch courage - plan to drive to the heart of natural beauty surrounding by the mountains , lakes and wildlife - wish me luck

Death the word trepidatious springs to mind

If you're really going to go through with it, I hope you succeed. I've seen you around here for a bit and I'm on to charcoal method as well. Take care and may you find peace in your journey.
 
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wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,802
I hope you succeed.
 
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Karenbaker

Member
Jun 17, 2018
63
There are thousands of reported deaths with CO. Brain damage can happen with any method if you're discovered early. CO poisoning is a scientifically proven, lethal phenomenon. Stop spreading misinformation.
Well I'm not spreading misinformation brain damage can occur with this method and I'd sure rather have my health than have brain damage for life
 
V

VX1

Student
Jun 28, 2018
118
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musicislife

Student
Jun 15, 2018
159
You have the weather on your side just make sure it doesent get too hot in the car and you have to call off your attempt. Three barbecues should well and truly do just don't cook no food in then I've heard fat drippings can affect the toxicity of it. It takes great courage to sit and wait for your impending death but the Valium should help as will the Dutch courage

Godspeed friend
 
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MLongshaw

MLongshaw

Student
Aug 5, 2018
129
Have my three disposable barbecues packed in the boot of my car , bricks to put them on once the seats are down, matches important, duct tape for the windows and the vents , Valium and some jack Daniels for some Dutch courage - plan to drive to the heart of natural beauty surrounding by the mountains , lakes and wildlife - wish me luck

Death the word trepidatious springs to mind
Hope things go how you want. My deadline is the 12th. See you on the other side friend
 
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shadow11

Wizard
Jul 31, 2018
619
May you find peace
 
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6

6477244ts5

Student
Jun 13, 2018
193
Thanks Laura stay strong for the boy xx

I hope Jonny found peace but I really don't like this comment. When you have decided to leave this life...to stop fighting and give up any and all responsibilities...guilting someone else who is suffering just as much as you on your way out the door to keep suffering is terrible. Don't do that to others. Hold yourself to the same standard you hold others to and don't ask things of them you won't do.
 
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6

6477244ts5

Student
Jun 13, 2018
193
Maybe the dude had a conscience

You are missing the point. Applying different rules to others (ie stick around so you don't hurt someone else) than you do to yourself is wrong. Guilting someone to live in pain while you are stopping living in pain is wrong.
 
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6

6477244ts5

Student
Jun 13, 2018
193
I don't know maybe you should leave that to the girl Laura who it was posted to to decide or not ?

I don't need the person it was said to validate my opinion. I think guilting someone else into living when you are choosing not to is wrong. It's not complicated.
 
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Tiburcio

Guest
I hope Jonny found peace but I really don't like this comment. When you have decided to leave this life...to stop fighting and give up any and all responsibilities...guilting someone else who is suffering just as much as you on your way out the door to keep suffering is terrible. Don't do that to others. Hold yourself to the same standard you hold others to and don't ask things of them you won't do.
I agree with the most part of this but there is an exception.

She was mother and killing herself would transfer all the misery tho the child. Bringing life which you won't care or you will forsake is selfish. Do you really want a little child living in the orphanhood? Because let me say it ruins your life.

If you guilt her, you just hold back her. If you don't do it, you completely fuck a life who did notging wrong and it's paying for the consequences of others (the son).
 
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Mecha Man

Experienced
Jul 16, 2018
230
Um... I feel like everyone is extrapolating way too much from this "stay strong for the boy" comment. We don't have any idea if or when lara plans on ctbing. Maybe you guys know things I don't, but I'm just going by this one, single comment. We don't know even know how old the child is, nor do we know what her plans are. And it's not like the comment said, "don't ctb because it will fuck up your child." It just said stay strong. Good advice for anybody on here, really, under any circumstances.

As far as the whole idea of ctbing when you have a young child, well.... obviously if you're suicidal you shouldn't have a child in the first place (no offense to Lara. maybe it was an accident, or maybe you weren't suicidal then but you are now, who knows). A lot of people feel obligated to not hurt their families, and try to do things break up their relationships, make it look like an accident, or just keep on living for their sakes. This is a perspective that we as a community generally respect (or should, anyways). Having a young child is just an extension of that. It will potentially cause much more suffering, for a longer period of time, but it's still the same concept.

Therefore, since we mostly seem to (or again, should) respect the idea of someone who has parents and siblings to disregard this sense of familial and worldly obligations, we shouldn't make an exception for people with children. It may be an unpleasant thought, but we'll all be dead in the end anyways.

On a side note, I have to wonder how good of a parent a person who is that desperate to ctb can really be. Not trying to say it's better to ctb (or not to ctb), just adding a new angle. When you completely lose your mind, it.... changes you.
 
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Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
Um... I feel like everyone is extrapolating way too much from this "stay strong for the boy" comment. We don't have any idea if or when lara plans on ctbing. Maybe you guys know things I don't, but I'm just going by this one, single comment. We don't know even know how old the child is, nor do we know what her plans are. And it's not like the comment said, "don't ctb because it will fuck up your child." It just said stay strong. Good advice for anybody on here, really, under any circumstances.

As far as the whole idea of ctbing when you have a young child, well.... obviously if you're suicidal you shouldn't have a child in the first place (no offense to Lara. maybe it was an accident, or maybe you weren't suicidal then but you are now, who knows). A lot of people feel obligated to not hurt their families, and try to do things break up their relationships, make it look like an accident, or just keep on living for their sakes. This is a perspective that we as a community generally respect (or should, anyways). Having a young child is just an extension of that. It will potentially cause much more suffering, for a longer period of time, but it's still the same concept.

Therefore, since we mostly seem to (or again, should) respect the idea of someone who has parents and siblings to disregard this sense of familial and worldly obligations, we shouldn't make an exception for people with children. It may be an unpleasant thought, but we'll all be dead in the end anyways.

On a side note, I have to wonder how good of a parent a person who is that desperate to ctb can really be. Not trying to say it's better to ctb (or not to ctb), just adding a new angle. When you completely lose your mind, it.... changes you.
The boy is 9
 
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ReleaseMe

I know it's over And it never really began
May 26, 2018
120
Also Laura explained how her husbands death a couple of years ago pushed her over the edge. But IMO it doesn't help her or anyone else to discuss that further unless she asks for it. And having a young child while being suicidal is really a dilemma isnt it. Stay strong is as close as it gets to helpful advice.
 
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musicislife

Student
Jun 15, 2018
159
:'( it's been nice taking to you and thankyou for your advice.
I hope everything goes as you planned and you have a smooth and peaceful exit.xx
Laura your in a a bit of debate here !! What's your thoughts on the comment appreciated or disheartening??
 
Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I seem to have started something here.
Let's face it,most of us are here because we want to end our life because of different reasons wether it be social,financial or personal.we should all have that choice as it is our life to do as we please.Having a child does add a different dimension and it's not as black and white as people persume.Everyone has their opinion from different view points either a son,father,relative or friend but having a child does not make you excempt from sucidal thoughts or the depths of depresson which lead us to this point.
In an ideal world, I would just except my husband death and carry on and pretend everything is OK for my son's sake but it's fake.
I feel on the edge of life all the time trying to hang on to normality.My son sees a shell of a person because I really died with my hubby as sad as it is
.I don't have any hope or cannot see a future no matter how hard I try. I have been in this place for 2 years and have had professional mental health care and am still at this point.I have accepted criticism and I know some things I say are extreme but these thoughts have become normal for me..I hate myself as a mum for having these feelings which are morally wrong but I am hurting so badly.
I care for my son and he does not want for anything other than to have his mum back.he was born into a happy loving family which fell apart ,.my husband had a massive stroke,he collapsed on a Saturday and died on the Monday. I love our boy so much and he is the only reason I am still here.It would be selfish of me to go and it would be cruel because I am the only person he should be able to relay on. I have really taken on board people's comments. One person had said how I casually say things but this is my reality and established way of thinking as crazy as it sounds.I know people worry for my boy and I will continue to fight for as long as I can and that's all I can say.
 
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6

6477244ts5

Student
Jun 13, 2018
193
I agree with the most part of this but there is an exception.

She was mother and killing herself would transfer all the misery tho the child. Bringing life which you won't care or you will forsake is selfish. Do you really want a little child living in the orphanhood? Because let me say it ruins your life.

If you guilt her, you just hold back her. If you don't do it, you completely fuck a life who did notging wrong and it's paying for the consequences of others (the son).

The point is you cannot cut yourself from all responsibility in life and guilt someone else into not doing so without being a huge hypocrite. Of course nobody wants a child to be an orphan. Sometimes people cannot hang on no matter what ties them to this world. It's selfish to CTB but tell someone else they need to stay alive. There is always damage. This isn't some random thing people choose to do...it's what happens when they cannot cope...and no amount of emotional manipulation can change that.
 
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