erdbeeren
Student
- Oct 13, 2021
- 100
I can and will never realistically have the things I truly want. My life is objectively void of purpose. I have no real friends, no activities I enjoy, no motivation.
I hate school and most of the people there. I get treated like shit just for being different. Everyone who's around me ostracizes. Some pretend to be friendly occasionally and then walk a few feet's distance to make fun of me moments later as if I'm fucking deaf. I get shoved and even kicked sometimes. People used to poke me with pencils to see if/how I'd react. They also use slurs and no teachers or staff seem to care. In fact, many will laugh along.
I've no meaningful relationships besides with my cat. And he's likely the only one who will remember and mourn me after I ctb. The people will probably be sad for a day then go on about their lives. It may be a little longer for my parents, but ultimately, their lives, too, will barely change.
I'm a nobody. A prisoner of this fat, abhorrent cell they call a body. My last remaining options are to continue suffering and seething in silence or take matters into my own hands.
I hate school and most of the people there. I get treated like shit just for being different. Everyone who's around me ostracizes. Some pretend to be friendly occasionally and then walk a few feet's distance to make fun of me moments later as if I'm fucking deaf. I get shoved and even kicked sometimes. People used to poke me with pencils to see if/how I'd react. They also use slurs and no teachers or staff seem to care. In fact, many will laugh along.
I've no meaningful relationships besides with my cat. And he's likely the only one who will remember and mourn me after I ctb. The people will probably be sad for a day then go on about their lives. It may be a little longer for my parents, but ultimately, their lives, too, will barely change.
I'm a nobody. A prisoner of this fat, abhorrent cell they call a body. My last remaining options are to continue suffering and seething in silence or take matters into my own hands.