Venting Therapy only wants you to listen to them

[LoneMisery]

People suggest therapy all the time but little do they know you cant be yourself. Theyre always going to twist your point of view around to see it their way. When friends and family think that its going to help. All therapy does is help friends and family for you to become the person they want you to be instead of who you are. Therefore i will never go to therapy. Someone like us would infuriate or displease a therapist. Theres no way theyre going to let you sit there and tell them how you feel without them trying you to view it a different way, instead of relating with you. Therapy are for people who arent suicidal but are in a funk and need a coach to push them back out onto the field. I dont want to change. I want to find the strength and will to go through with my plans.
I havent seen one in years but all I remember is they listen yes but then want to give you their insight as if the books they read in college are the answer to our problems. Maybe I should go to my local clinic and see if things have changed.
Im afraid to go because I fear i wont be leaving in my own car but an ambulance.
We as a suicidal community are more taboo than the LGBQT community as that is being more accepted as the norm.

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

This wasn't my experience with therapy.

 

[Dot]

Snds lke u cld hve hd an inadqute thrpst

Thrpsts cn smtmes try 2 gve u a altrn8tv perspcvte b/ thy r oftn focusd on ur feelngs & wht thy r & y u fl tht wy

Fr thrpy 2 b effctve u nd 2 b abl 2 trst ur thrpst

Thre r gd 1s out thre - am srry tht u hve hd a bd exprnce s/ fr

If u try thrpy agn mke sre 2 tll thm wht u hve sd in ur abve pst abt ur exprnces - thse feelngs r imprtnt fr n.e thrpst 2 knw abt s/ cn hlp u bettr

 

[Onthe29th]

Therapists aren't perfect people and if you had a poor experience with one, you should definitely switch.

 

[LoneMisery]

Therapy is to alternate my perspective? As if i am wrong for my feelings and views? You telling me a therapist will help me ctb? I dont think so but thanks for trying
I feel if youre going to therapy ypu really dont want to ctb. Because i dont need to Alternatively change my perspective when i feel what i feel towards myself is justified.
I get it no ones gonna coach you into ctb. Thats illegal. I also dont need to try and have my words twisted around in order to make me some how subconsciously become less suicidal
Everything that you say that society thinks as negative will be turned around to make you see what society is positive

 

[angiegirl30]

Not my experience with therapy. In fact I talked to my counselor yesterday and I found it extremely helpful. And I'm suicidal. But trying not to be. She listened and asked me questions. She also gave me advice and explained her reasoning behind it. But I did all the work. I don't agree with everything she says but I tell when I don't and why. I guess you have to find the counselor that's best for you and that you click with. I've changed counselors when I thought it wasn't a good fit for me. Hope you consider what I said with an open mind. I wish you the best and hate that you are hurting so much.

 

[markimobzzdeasui]

That has been my experience with therapy as well and even more severe than that. But I would not go on and label Therapy in entirety as unhelpful. But I completely understand what you are saying about Suicide and Therapy. Not all therapists are equipped and trained to treat and comfort people who are living in different stages of Suicidal Ideation. Getting traumatized,invalidated and gaslighted after going to therapy for help with suicidal thoughts is also not very uncommon. Compassionate,understanding and validating therapists though do exist but it is not always easy to find or afford them. But it is very painful place to be in as a sufferer considering the stigma and guilt that comes with suicide.

 

[LoneMisery]

Not my experience with therapy. In fact I talked to my counselor yesterday and I found it extremely helpful. And I'm suicidal. But trying not to be. She listened and asked me questions. She also gave me advice and explained her reasoning behind it. But I did all the work. I don't agree with everything she says but I tell when I don't and why. I guess you have to find the counselor that's best for you and that you click with. I've changed counselors when I thought it wasn't a good fit for me. Hope you consider what I said with an open mind. I wish you the best and hate that you are hurting so much.

I guess youre trying to not ctb where im looking for more motivation more ideas and openings in my own mind to push myself forward. To push myself over the natural instinct. Im sorry that i have hit a nerve on some people here who seems they just dont wamt to ctb as much as others.
If you really dont want to ctb but say you do then that to me is a cry for attention
I actually want to go through it its just hard to overcome natural survival instinct.
If i didnt care about pain id just go to a train but the reaaon i want to ctb so bad is because of pain. Im not gonna spend the last few seconds on earth in agony

 

[angiegirl30]

I'm sorry if I offended you. That was not my intention. I just disagreed with the statement that you thought therapy only wants you to listen. It is their job after all to advise their patients. But I feel some are better at it than others. I was just relaying my experiences.

As far as if I want o truly ctb or not. I don't know to be very honest. It's an enormous decision. Some days I do and some I don't. It's not a cry for attention. It's me being honest with how I feel. I am in a lot of physical pain most days. At times I feel it's unbearable. I'm trying to figure out what I want to do. In the meantime, I'd like to help others if I can. That is all. Plain and simple.

I'm sorry you're in so much pain. It truly isn't the way life is supposed to be. I hope you find what you need. And please know that I will be thinking of you.

 

[LoneMisery]

I'm sorry if I offended you. That was not my intention. I just disagreed with the statement that you thought therapy only wants you to listen. It is their job after all to advise their patients. But I feel some are better at it than others. I was just relaying my experiences.

As far as if I want o truly ctb or not. I don't know to be very honest. It's an enormous decision. Some days I do and some I don't. It's not a cry for attention. It's me being honest with how I feel. I am in a lot of physical pain most days. At times I feel it's unbearable. I'm trying to figure out what I want to do. In the meantime, I'd like to help others if I can. That is all. Plain and simple.

I'm sorry you're in so much pain. It truly isn't the way life is supposed to be. I hope you find what you need. And please know that I will be thinking of you.

You didnt offend me. I just know its what i want. To say small things like sex drugs and friends would be a reason to not ctb. Its not. For me at least. I hate how i feel so guilty when envision myself going through with it. Then the same people i think about that make me feel guilty just tell me to get help. So then im back to wanting to ctb again. And i get angry with them. Im always the first person who messages or calls any of these people. I just want to over come my natural instinct of survival. I dont have any other routes of plans but to either use a g or use a train and i dont want to feel pain. So now im in a whirlwind of abusing myself with alcohol and i just feel im never gonna win. Its such a terrible feeling.
I dont want therapist to try to psych me out of these plans or feelings and i feel thats what theyre intentions are. To steer you into the direction that i dont want to go.

 

[Rob1984]

I feel if youre going to therapy ypu really dont want to ctb.

ctb isn't a dichotomy, where you either want to do it or you don't. For majority of people, it's a game of tug-of-war. Somedays the urge is strong, others it isn't. Sometimes an event is so tragic, it puts you over the edge and you ctb. Sometimes an event is so joyful, you can't believe you actually wanted to ctb a week earlier. It's a struggle for people. It's not black and white where you either do or don't wanna do it. And if we are gonna be scientific, biologically you are wired to not want to ctb. So someone could argue none of us actually want to ctb, and we are just fighting against that survival instict. Lot's of ways to look at it friend, but be careful turning it into some type of dichotomy.

Also, therapy for me wasn't like your experience at all. There are definitely bad therapists out there, and I mean BAD! But please, if you did have a bad experience, recognize it for what it was and don't group all therapists together in the same category. That isn't fair to all the good therapists who try extremely hard to help people with all the love in their heart.

Lastly, therapy is not a panacea. Different strokes for different folks. If therapy doesn't work for you, that's totally fair, but that doesn't mean it won't work for other people.

I'm sorry you're going through a hard time. I really, really am. Everyone on this site has either been there or is currently there. Feel free to message me if you ever want to.

 

[whywere]

Therapy for me was mandated by my state after a suicide attempt and it was WORTHLESS. In fact, to me it seemed all about money. On Fridays we had to come in and have a yoga class as that was going to reshape my suicide ideation aspects, say what?? No, it did not.

The one bright spot in it all was being able to talk to the other folks in the group who were in the same boat as me and we could exchange ideas as far as what worked for them in getting better. But the instructors and general theme was so wrong for me. Case in point, I was on meds from the hospital when I was put in after my attempt and when I was released from the hospital and had to go to therapy, at therapy I was assigned a new doctor who completely changed my meds around and when I was done with therapy and went to a mental health clinic, they, AGAIN!!, changed my meds around the third time.

Ego and money says it all.

Walter