Discussion Therapists

[Fadinglife]

What experiences do you have with psychiatrists and mental health systems? What flaws do you see in it and how can it be addressed? I have noticed they have retraumatized me and made things worse.

This is an article about therapists. What do you think about it? https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-tell-if-my-therapist-is-bad/answer/Iva-Izabela-Miholic

 

[MeltingHeart]

What experiences do you have with psychiatrists and mental health systems? What flaws do you see in it and how can it be addressed? I have noticed they have retraumatized me and made things worse.

This is an article about therapists. What do you think about it? https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-tell-if-my-therapist-is-bad/answer/Iva-Izabela-Miholic

I have found ALL of them to be extremely patronizing, quite unkind, some of them seem v miserable themselves, they only see their point of view, v.narrow minded, some just plain dumb, they have all made me feel much much worse and felt way more alone, misunderstood and despairing. this is why i want to ctb before I have to go through dealing with anymore of these people. I will read that article now-just had to vent first-sorry!

 

[Fadinglife]

I have found ALL of them to be extremely patronizing, quite unkind, some of them seem v miserable themselves, they only see their point of view, v.narrow minded, some just plain dumb, they have all made me feel much much worse and felt way more alone, misunderstood and despairing. this is why i want to ctb before I have to go through dealing with anymore of these people. I will read that article now-just had to vent first-sorry!

I feel for you. It has been my experience too.

 

[bluedream]

My experience with therapists and the mental healthcare system in general has been mixed. I do see a therapist monthly, not for recovery exactly, but because therapy helps me be content with my remaining days here. I think my biggest issue with the mental healthcare system is that it's depressingly pro-life. No matter how rational someone's decision to ctb is, they can't tell their therapist because they'll be put into a hospital until they say they no longer want to die. Until doctors acknowledge that an individual has the right to end their own life if they choose, the mental health system won't be any good for people like us.

I have found ALL of them to be extremely patronizing, quite unkind, some of them seem v miserable themselves, they only see their point of view, v.narrow minded, some just plain dumb, they have all made me feel much much worse and felt way more alone, misunderstood and despairing. this is why i want to ctb before I have to go through dealing with anymore of these people. I will read that article now-just had to vent first-sorry!

They're absolutely patronizing. That's a great way to put it.

 

[hypo666]

My experience with psychologists is I have seen two,one was crap and the other was good but due to lack of nhs resources I couldn't carry on seeing her. The 'crap' one it was more I think due to his style not suiting me than him being 'crap'. the experience was crap though.

My experience with psychiatrists is horrendous with one honourable exception. one psychiatrist DR J, diagnosed me with paranoid schizophrenia {which apparently is a mis diagnosis}, he put me on high doses of anti psychotics which caused horrendous side effects including male breast growth. He wouldn't take me off the drug which caused the breast growth until I had seen an endocrinologist and also a plastic surgeon.It was only when the surgeon wrote to him, that he took me off it. By that time I had lived with having man breasts for 4 months. When he finally took me off the drug the breast growth reduced, but he told me I would be on anti psychotic drugs the rest of my life. A year later he took me off all medication,saying he wasn't sure of my diagnosis. When I didn't relapse after 6 months he discharged me.

I stayed out the mental health system for ten years, until I had a big meltdown caused party by isolation but also by a noisy neighbour. I got into a bit of trouble and made a suicide attempt. I was put back under mental health team and saw a new psychiatrist drb . who unlike other doctors, listened to me for hours talk about my school days, and early aduilt life, the schiozphrenia diagnosis, and the isolation and finally what happened with the neighbour. She then apologised for what Iam not sure but she apologised, she was a lovely scottish lady and I saw her several times, but as usual sods law operated and she transferred to elsewhere in the country. But she told me ,she didn't believe I ever had schizophrenia ,she said I had PTSD. I think if she was my regular shrink it's possible I could get better, she just seemed to understand me better than other doctors.

The third psychiatrist is the one Iam still seeing, Dr G, he isn't a bad person, he hasn't drugged me up, but I would say he;'s benign, won't harm me, but won't heal me either. He thinks I have a personality disorder,

The fourth psychiatrist is the one I see when in hospital, Dr C,she is horrendous, shehas threatened me with the police if I dare mention suicidal ideation ever again, she likes to make sarcastic remarks, and thinks all patients are there to scam her and her collegues. She thinks the assessment unit is some paradise and patients like being there. She was once so rude I asked her to discharge me on the spot, which she did!, but I wasn't well and ended up in emergency accomodation days after she discharged me My CPN made a complaint about her at the time over that, nothing seems to have changed, she is still bloody rude.

 

[MeltingHeart]

My experience with therapists and the mental healthcare system in general has been mixed. I do see a therapist monthly, not for recovery exactly, but because therapy helps me be content with my remaining days here. I think my biggest issue with the mental healthcare system is that it's depressingly pro-life. No matter how rational someone's decision to ctb is, they can't tell their therapist because they'll be put into a hospital until they say they no longer want to die. Until doctors acknowledge that an individual has the right to end their own life if they choose, the mental health system won't be any good for people like us.

They're absolutely patronizing. That's a great way to put it.

I always wonder if assisted sucide would ever to become total legal and virtually accepted by all (like abortion in this country-some dont agree-but mostly it is accepted) or access to good exit medication at home for everyone-no matter what age - and even if in good health- I wonder how many people would do it? I wonder if it would save the lives of some that feel in a desperate/ temp situation as they would know they have that option in the future if things didnt get better but at the same time give US the freedom to be released from our depair-if it long term and untreatable.

 

[AngelOfDeath01]

I went to five different psychologists and psychiatrists. I know they may work for some people but for my case it didn't. One was very unkind. When we were talking he seemed not to care, and acted a very strange way when I asked him about the kind of injection he wanted to give me. So I left the hospital that night. My parents were very upset about it. The others, I felt they tried their best but it simply wasn't good enough. I don't mean to offend any one of them but their types of questions and counseling I am sure I could've got from the internet or from a family member.

 

[MeltingHeart]

My experience with psychologists is I have seen two,one was crap and the other was good but due to lack of nhs resources I couldn't carry on seeing her. The 'crap' one it was more I think due to his style not suiting me than him being 'crap'. the experience was crap though.

My experience with psychiatrists is horrendous with one honourable exception. one psychiatrist DR J, diagnosed me with paranoid schizophrenia {which apparently is a mis diagnosis}, he put me on high doses of anti psychotics which caused horrendous side effects including male breast growth. He wouldn't take me off the drug which caused the breast growth until I had seen an endocrinologist and also a plastic surgeon.It was only when the surgeon wrote to him, that he took me off it. By that time I had lived with having man breasts for 4 months. When he finally took me off the drug the breast growth reduced, but he told me I would be on anti psychotic drugs the rest of my life. A year later he took me off all medication,saying he wasn't sure of my diagnosis. When I didn't relapse after 6 months he discharged me.

I stayed out the mental health system for ten years, until I had a big meltdown caused party by isolation but also by a noisy neighbour. I got into a bit of trouble and made a suicide attempt. I was put back under mental health team and saw a new psychiatrist drb . who unlike other doctors, listened to me for hours talk about my school days, and early aduilt life, the schiozphrenia diagnosis, and the isolation and finally what happened with the neighbour. She then apologised for what Iam not sure but she apologised, she was a lovely scottish lady and I saw her several times, but as usual sods law operated and she transferred to elsewhere in the country. But she told me ,she didn't believe I ever had schizophrenia ,she said I had PTSD. I think if she was my regular shrink it's possible I could get better, she just seemed to understand me better than other doctors.

The third psychiatrist is the one Iam still seeing, Dr G, he isn't a bad person, he hasn't drugged me up, but I would say he;'s benign, won't harm me, but won't heal me either. He thinks I have a personality disorder,

The fourth psychiatrist is the one I see when in hospital, Dr C,she is horrendous, shehas threatened me with the police if I dare mention suicidal ideation ever again, she likes to make sarcastic remarks, and thinks all patients are there to scam her and her collegues. She thinks the assessment unit is some paradise and patients like being there. She was once so rude I asked her to discharge me on the spot, which she did!, but I wasn't well and ended up in emergency accomodation days after she discharged me My CPN made a complaint about her at the time over that, nothing seems to have changed, she is still bloody rude.

god the first and fourth one sound awful!

I went to five different psychologists and psychiatrists. I know they may work for some people but for my case it didn't. One was very unkind. When we were talking he seemed not to care, and acted a very strange way when I asked him about the kind of injection he wanted to give me. So I left the hospital that night. My parents were very upset about it. The others, I felt they tried their best but it simply wasn't good enough. I don't mean to offend any one of them but their types of questions and counseling I am sure I could've got from the internet or from a family member.

yeah they offer nothing new or helpful for me too

 

[bluedream]

I always wonder if assisted sucide would ever to become total legal and virtually accepted by all (like abortion in this country-some dont agree-but mostly it is accepted) or access to good exit medication at home for everyone-no matter what age - and even if in good health- I wonder how many people would do it? I wonder if it would save the lives of some that feel in a desperate/ temp situation as they would know they have that option in the future if things didnt get better but at the same time give US the freedom to be released from our depair-if it long term and untreatable.

I think in the future it will become more accepted and less stigmatized. I definitely think it would help a lot if we had legal access to painless methods. I'd certainly feel a lot less trapped in life if I had a simpler way out.

 

[MeltingHeart]

I think in the future it will become more accepted and less stigmatized. I definitely think it would help a lot if we had legal access to painless methods. I'd certainly feel a lot less trapped in life if I had a simpler way out.

Its so cruel as we had no choice to be bought into this world-least of to people that rejected us soon after- yet we are also not allowed to leave it. But suicide is not illegal anymore- so why do we not have access to the least horrific methods

 

[bluedream]

Its so cruel as we had no choice to be bought into this world-least of to people that rejected us soon after- yet we are also not allowed to leave it. But suicide is not illegal anymore- so why do we not have access to the least horrific methods

Even if its not illegal, if we tell anyone we get put away in a psych ward, which is more or less a sort of punishment disguised as rehabilitation. It's cruel for sure. We deserve the right to choose

 

[BridgeJumper]

All of them are patronising, judgemental and dismissive, and some of them are even plain rude and toxic.
None would adress my problems in a way that would help solve them. I would be punished by being talked down to and told to get my shit together when I started crying whenever I honestly admitted to feeling worse / more suicidal than usual. So I started telling them Im getting better and instantly, I was praised and treated normally. Like wtf? They told me my depression will go away when I start helping around the house or get an job. Seemed pretty upset I havent found a job yet. Diagnosed me with everything under the sun, paranoid schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type 2, borderline personality disorder and pushed drugs on me that turned my brain into mush, made me fat, caused me to tremble and have muscle contractions and sleep for 16hours everyday and still want to jump off a bridge. One of my therapists told me I fake my mental health problems so I can get money from the government, and another one threatened me with alawsuit because her friend fell in love with me when I didnt love him back and she saw me as the cause of his health declining. Not to mention using my diagnosis to deny me treatment. It would go like this, Ill go inpatient, they would say they cant help me and I need to get help in a treatment center for my personality disorder, so Ill gather all the papers, make 380 km in the car to talk with some stuck up shrink about my admission, he would go through my medical history, notice Im also bipolar and hell be like, 'Sorry, we cannot treat you because your other diagnosis will interfere with therapy'. And he wrote some pretty mean stuff in my referal card like for example 'Im extremely weird, with strange mannerisms and Im a delusional schizophrenic'. I applied to another facility and they decided Im too sick to be helped and discharged me, too. I feel like the caste of The Untouchable in India. Like no one can help me or nobody even wants to. Idk whats worse. Crazy how people who claim to be trained in helping sufferers like us can be completely and utterly unprofessional :/

 

[MeltingHeart]

All of them are patronising, judgemental and dismissive, and some of them are even plain rude and toxic.
None would adress my problems in a way that would help solve them. I would be punished by being talked down to and told to get my shit together when I started crying whenever I honestly admitted to feeling worse / more suicidal than usual. So I started telling them Im getting better and instantly, I was praised and treated normally. Like wtf? They told me my depression will go away when I start helping around the house or get an job. Seemed pretty upset I havent found a job yet. Diagnosed me with everything under the sun, paranoid schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type 2, borderline personality disorder and pushed drugs on me that turned my brain into mush, made me fat, caused me to tremble and have muscle contractions and sleep for 16hours everyday and still want to jump off a bridge. One of my therapists told me I fake my mental health problems so I can get money from the government, and another one threatened me with alawsuit because her friend fell in love with me when I didnt love him back and she saw me as the cause of his health declining. Not to mention using my diagnosis to deny me treatment. It would go like this, Ill go inpatient, they would say they cant help me and I need to get help in a treatment center for my personality disorder, so Ill gather all the papers, make 380 km in the car to talk with some stuck up shrink about my admission, he would go through my medical history, notice Im also bipolar and hell be like, 'Sorry, we cannot treat you because your other diagnosis will interfere with therapy'. And he wrote some pretty mean stuff in my referal card like for example 'Im extremely weird, with strange mannerisms and Im a delusional schizophrenic'. I applied to another facility and they decided Im too sick to be helped and discharged me, too. I feel like the caste of The Untouchable in India. Like no one can help me or nobody even wants to. Idk whats worse. Crazy how people who claim to be trained in helping sufferers like us can be completely and utterly unprofessional :/

sounds like a complex situation, and that can hve been moved around alotfrom pillar to post and not found the right person and/ or have the right diagnosis as yet. sounds frustrating!!

 

[TAW122]

@MeltingHeart @mamasgirl and @BridgeJumper1994 all summarize up my perception on therapists (as well as most other mental health professional, social worker, etc.). I'd like to add that they aren't really the patient's friend or ally. If you as much as hint or even say anything about wanting to die, you run a high risk of being locked up (involuntarily committed, psych hold, etc.) against your will. Yes, until they change and/or have an open mind about suicidality and people who have made a rational decision to end it (in other words, be pro-choice and respectful of another's decision to end his/her own life without doing harm to others), anyone who is truly suicidal will never go to them.

Sometimes, even without hinting at CTB or violence, if they suspect any behavior or conversation to be headed towards CTB or violence, they would start questioning and probing you. I once had a psychologist probe me by asking me whether I owned a firearm (at the time I didn't, and even if I did, I would not want to answer truthfully, for fear of the risk of being locked up or other consequence). It certainly didn't help that it was the same week (or soon after) when the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High (Florida school shooting in February 2018) shooting occurred. I could see that therapists and mental health counselors want to cover their asses and their jobs (along with other legal requirements) and have to do what they do, but I think the law should be rewritten to such that only those who pose a danger to others would be reported instead of people who just want to end their pain (but that's another thread for another time). Mind you, I never even mentioned anything about CTB or violence during that time, but some red flag must have set her alarm bells to go off and she started to question, probe me of potentially incriminating questions (such as whether I owned a firearm, if I wanted to hurt others/myself, etc.). It is very degrading, insulting, and patronizing.

I have always kept a distance and my guard up when speaking to these people because I know that if I act or say something that isn't correct or sets off a red flag, it's only inviting trouble for me (potentially legal trouble and/or ending up in the mental health system; despite not having committed any crimes). I vowed never to go to them unless I needed to for something (getting a diagnoses for applying for disabilities, going because I am ordered by law or employment), and even then, I plan to be as vague and direct as possible, while careful.