When i tried partial hanging/blood choke, i thought to myself -this is it, there is no going back, are you sure? And the voice in my head, the same negative voice that for decades that belittles me, dwells on every bad decision, that hates myself, makes me re-live every bad memory, the one has made me stay in my room for years because of anxiety and paranoia, the one that tells me that i will fail and me feeling worse if i even attempt to move out of my comfort zone. The voice that never shuts up, not for every minute, every second what a loser i am ( are odd exceptions) from morning to night. It actually HAD SHUT UP, i felt so much at peace. Every part of my soul shouted out YES YES freedom! (Especially that voice) Unfortunately/fortunately I found out by the bruises on my neck the next morning that the cord i used had stretched and the knots had moved and no longer pressed on my cartoid arteries.
Mixed emotions, intially I was glad to have the fortitude to pull trigger as such (I truly believed that i was going to die) and was still in shock, unsure but then after a few hours later negative feelings and THE VOICE returned.
Do other people get THAT VOICE?
Mixed emotions, intially I was glad to have the fortitude to pull trigger as such (I truly believed that i was going to die) and was still in shock, unsure but then after a few hours later negative feelings and THE VOICE returned.
Do other people get THAT VOICE?
