The irrefutable reality that I’m not meant for this world

[Monet]

The world sometimes feels so strange and foreign, as though I were never meant to be in it at all. There are no words to describe how out of place I feel, how fake everything seems at times. I don't know how to cope with it, when I stare at my face in the mirror sometimes I don't even recognize myself. My eyes, my lips, nose, the arrangement of every feature on my face. It's as if I were staring at a photo presented to me by a stranger, perhaps searching for someone long lost and once meant something to someone, somebody's baby, with a place in society.

Everyone feels so far away from me, and I feel far away from everyone else. The current affairs in the world, it feels as though everything is falling apart, and it is. It doesn't feel real, sometimes I stare at my face and believe that I am some form of spectral being put on earth to experience it for the first time. I am not a human, and this is not my face, I have no face. I can rise out of my own body and float above my bed. When I feel lightheaded it is my inner core, pressing against the shell of my head, trying to rise out, trying to come home. Far above this house, this existence, and farther away to a different life. One with more hope than what could ever be found in this one.

 

[kitkatt]

The world sometimes feels so strange and foreign, as though I were never meant to be in it at all. There are no words to describe how out of place I feel, how fake everything seems at times. I don't know how to cope with it, when I stare at my face in the mirror sometimes I don't even recognize myself. My eyes, my lips, nose, the arrangement of every feature on my face. It's as if I were staring at a photo presented to me by a stranger, perhaps searching for someone long lost and once meant something to someone, somebody's baby, with a place in society.

Everyone feels so far away from me, and I feel far away from everyone else. The current affairs in the world, it feels as though everything is falling apart, and it is. It doesn't feel real, sometimes I stare at my face and believe that I am some form of spectral being put on earth to experience it for the first time. I am not a human, and this is not my face, I have no face. I can rise out of my own body and float above my bed. When I feel lightheaded it is my inner core, pressing against the shell of my head, trying to rise out, trying to come home. Far above this house, this existence, and farther away to a different life. One with more hope than what could ever be found in this one.

I don't feel real either. I see myself but I only see a reflection. No one knows me for not only am I scared of bareing myself but i am scared of knowing myself. Who am I. What am I. Why do I feel as though this body is not my own? Was it because I'm a mistake or Is it because I'm meant for the stars

 

[GyreOfAsh]

Feels like I'm being gaslit by this reality into believing that this is me. I think I finally get why people do drugs now.