The DOWN is finally over! Hello UP!!!

[WornOutLife]

Well, since last Sunday, I was veeeeeery depressed and yesterday I finally had a breakdown and vented on a thread about my existential crisis and bipolar disorder lol.

I just slept a lot and hoped to feel better today and guess what? I'm finally better. The DOWN is over and the UP has started! (it's a normal UP. I'm not with a lot of mania).

There are three things which helped me a lot:

1. Sleeping a lot! Somehow, without mini ODs of my sleeping pills, I was able to sleep. It was as if my body was telling me: "Hey Matt, you just gotta turn off your brain and rest, bro".

2. I was very anxious about 2 new English courses I gotta teach because it had to be confirmed and I'm really working a lot but then realized that it's okay. I know how to deal with this. Teaching is my passion. I will handle it somehow and the best part is that I'll get more money and be able to visit the country of my dreams: Japan! Btw, the courses have been confirmed. I start next week!

3. Last but not least, THANK YOU!!!! I really appreciate the comments I received on my previous thread and especially the private messages. How can you be so kind? I'm sorry to make you worry. I kinda wanted to ctb but I decided to calm down first and then realized the obvious: acting impulsively is not the answer.


Well, I hope not to have bored you with this thread.

Hugs and love to you all,

Matt

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you enjoy feeling better. It does suck when you get so depressed that you are constantly questioning your existence. Sleep is certainly the best thing, it is like death without the commitment, insomnia makes me feel so much worse. Its so cool you can go to Japan. I wish you the best.

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

Here is the up down album to help with the down up up down down up up down

 

[Tonight634]

Good to hear! Hopefully you'll get to visit Japan soon, it's also my dream so I hope I can get there too one day

 

[AE2021]

Boy, do I understand the up and down roller coaster!! Sometimes mine can give me whiplash, and other times it is a slow roll. So glad that you are on the upswing. Even though I don't comment a lot, I very much look forward to your wise and compassionate posts. Glad that you will be here for a while. Sounds like you have found your stride to come back and participate in some meaningful activities.....your students are very lucky to have you as their teacher!

 

[WornOutLife]

Boy, do I understand the up and down roller coaster!! Sometimes mine can give me whiplash, and other times it is a slow roll. So glad that you are on the upswing. Even though I don't comment a lot, I very much look forward to your wise and compassionate posts. Glad that you will be here for a while. Sounds like you have found your stride to come back and participate in some meaningful activities.....your students are very lucky to have you as their teacher!

Aww thank you so much for your words!
It feels awesome that you understand the hell these goddamn ups and downs can be!

I hope to feel like this for some weeks at least.

Some months ago, my mood changed in just hours!!! It was way much worse!

Anyway, thanks for dropping by!

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[Xaxysh]

I'm so proud of u matt

 

[Cherry Crumpet]

I'm so happy for you Matt. I see you on here all the time, responding to ppl, giving comfort. You deserve to be happy. If you get another down - pls talk to all of us. We're in this together. We can do it.