Venting The amount of endless suffering in this world is beyond horrifying

[FuneralCry]

It truly is so horrifying the amount of suffering there is in this world, it's simply beyond comprehension. I find it really disturbing how something as hellish as life even exists in the first place, to me life is a virus that has caused nothing but senseless cruelty and so much harm with no deeper purpose or meaning behind it. What's tragic to me is how life even exists when the absence of everything is perfection, it's an horrific tragedy how existing beings have been tormented in this meaningless existence all throughout history.

The fact that existence is so incredibly harmful with endless potential for suffering is why only suicide is rational in my case, suicide is rational for me as there is literally no limit as to how torturous existing can get. It's disturbing how human beings are capable of suffering so extremely and unnecessarily in an existence that was always futile and meaningless in the first place, this world where existing beings are tortured all for no reason and no purpose truly is the most evil place.

I see existence as imprisonment, it's a hellish and harmful imposition to have the ability to exist. Existence truly is nothing more than a process of slowly dying all while one risks suffering much more extremely at any moment and that's why it's evil to deny people painless suicide methods.

In my case existence is the prison and a peaceful way to cease existing would be the key, death is the way to find peace from the futile and torturous burden of existing of a human where all through no fault of one's own one can end up experiencing the most extreme agony and torture. Nobody can deny how evil and hellish existence is, no matter what existence will always be evil as it's the source of all suffering.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I also believe that suffering has no limit. That's why I don't believe in the concept of a rock bottom as things can always get worse for me. I feel like I'm already suffering so much by simply being aware of the reality I am in as well as how exhausting adulthood + work is. I believe that I'm suffering enough as it is but I know that I can suffer even more by getting screwed over with bad luck. After all, I'm not physically crippled yet nor do I have chronic pain but, the longer I live, the higher chances there are of me getting these things which is scary to think about. Everybody thinks that they're lucky and that they won't be the one to suffer so much until... they do

 

[attheend13]

I also believe that suffering has no limit. That's why I don't believe in the concept of a rock bottom as things can always get worse for me. I feel like I'm already suffering so much by simply being aware of the reality I am in as well as how exhausting adulthood + work is. I believe that I'm suffering enough as it is but I know that I can suffer even more by getting screwed over with bad luck. After all, I'm not physically crippled yet nor do I have chronic pain but, the longer I live, the higher chances there are of me getting these things which is scary to think about. Everybody thinks that they're lucky and that they won't be the one to suffer so much until... they do

Sometimes I look around and I see people laughing, holding hands, excited about whatever plan they have to go eat, fuck, or drink. Life is barbaric and cheap. It's meaningless and painful. But if I ctb today, im
the criminal. My kids are now grown, what message do I send them if I opt out? But I am a BURDEN to them and to every single person who crosses my path. I don't know if life is the virus or it's me but every single thing or person I touch I harm. I'm a failure. I'm an embarrassment and the pain is so intense and so constant it feels as if it's the pain of failure that should kill me but the universe is cold and cruel. If I want out I have to do it myself and let my final exit be the worst thing I've done. Be a failure as a mom once and for all. If I stay I ruin everyone anyway.
You said things can get worse and they can. They do. Even what seemed like something no one could take can be and has been taken in the time it took Thanos to snap the universe away. What a wonderful idea, to just disappear. But that's why a lot of us come here right? Scream into the void? Take a bit of the pressure off for a minute, survive one more endless night. The real true hell isn't somewhere I fear going, it's somewhere I call home. I wish I was not this thing.

 

[CTB Dream]

V awfl wrld all pain sffr no end, all type many many way no end pain sffr, this all nonsns life awfl life

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

That's my experience. And why I have to go, soon. There's someone that I'm waiting for to go to, I don't know if it'll work out, but I hope it does, and I hope we can be there for each other at the end.