Venting TFW your peers succeed but you're a failure

[Ash]

I thought I'd got used to my peers from school and university going on to achieve great and wonderful things, from happy marriages and families to work achievements, while I rot but it turns out that I haven't. Just found out that someone else I used to know has won a big award for their work. I'm not eating that I could have achieved the same but I started out on the same path as them and it hurts like hell to stand by and watch my peers succeed in one or more areas of their lives while every single aspect of mine is wretched and miserable. Even the things I used to be proud of are out of my reach now due to injuries and physical illness. And I can't even succeed at CTB ffs!

 

[vak]

I know how you feel, the ever-present feeling of being a failure, especially compared to others I had so many opportunities and burned them to the ground, and it doesn't get any better. Can't help you but here's a empathetic hug from the heart:

 

[BlendedHeart]

Same here. Every colleague around me has a lot to show for. Families, travels, fulfilling jobs, achievements. Of course they also have struggles, but at least they balance them with positive stuff. I got nothing, nothing to show. Even with the "potential" teachers said I had, even with all those certificates and awards I have from my academic life (which I hate), I did nothing. I got a huge hole on my CV because I was a NEET for many years, and even now I do something that won't be considered as a formal job, so I'm condemned to do some menial job for the rest of my life (One of my reasons for ctb)

They say you shouldn't compare to others, but it is so hard. Even if I deleted social media, their achievements come through conversations and memories. My insecurities, my depression, my shyness, my anxieties, my fears, they ruined my life. It's my own fault.