SURVIVE One check in per day for a week - whose in?

[Sunny13111]

I'll start. I'm here, alive, with a huge tumor yes. But alive. I thought I'd die before my mid twenties and often want to but I. Am. Here. And that'll do for the moment.

 

[owano]

I will continue.
I am also alive. I did not expect myself to make it to 18– I remember turning 13 and being deathly afraid of what being an adult would be like. I figured it would be extremely stressful having to figure out how to survive financially independent and all, and I’m currently living up to those fears with the stress of college applications and how I’ll be able to pay for it. But, alas, I’m still here, grasping at straws for reasons to live, and I suppose that will do for the moment.

 

[Sunny13111]

I will continue.
I am also alive. I did not expect myself to make it to 18– I remember turning 13 and being deathly afraid of what being an adult would be like. I figured it would be extremely stressful having to figure out how to survive financially independent and all, and I’m currently living up to those fears with the stress of college applications and how I’ll be able to pay for it. But, alas, I’m still here, grasping at straws for reasons to live, and I suppose that will do for the moment.

It so will do. I'm impressed owano. You're inspiring. Well done my lovely for still being here. I feel you pain and struggle and I'm not just saying this. Can I ask you a question? I'm going to have a big op soon for my cancer and can't work out how to fill my time when recovering. I have adhd, depression and the rest and I'm one actually scared I'll die opposed to wanting it (have tried a few times in my life) and that mainly.due to having kids now. How will I stay still? Ps thanks for being you. Human, kind and just you.

 

[owano]

Hi again! I’m actually not 100% sure what you mean by “how you can stay still” so hopefully my response makes sense with what you were asking — but what may help pass the time and alleviate stress is pursuing/picking up interests and hobbies. For example, my current thing is art. I’m no artist by any means but I like painting abstract art as there’s not much definition of what’s “right” and “wrong”, so it’s not really pressuring to do well. Instead, I just pick colors I feel inclined to choose, and work it out intuitionally. Learning new hobbies can help too! Crocheting comes to mind first, but I’ve never really tried it out too much - it was more of what my mom and aunt really enjoyed doing - so it might be daunting to learn but if it works out you could knit all sorts of things that can be used for yourself or for others (my aunt particularly enjoyed making scarves). You could also learn origami, as paper isn’t as expensive as art supplies, and some are relatively easy to figure out how to do. Of course, if there has been anything you’ve been interested in the past, but never got to it or stopped pursuing it for whatever reason, maybe now could be the time?

I really hope your op goes well! Cancer is the scariest thing (my parents were diagnosed with cancer around the same time. Luckily they’re in remission now, but it definitely was worse for my mom than my dad) :(. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be the one with cancer. I’d definitely talk to whoever you can, family, friends, and whoever else is willing to listen, because that is a huge situation to work through. You’re not alone in this, even though I’m sure it feels like that. I’m truly wishing the best for you and your family!

 

[steppenwolf]

Wow, someone with real problems. I'm not an oncologist and I've been lucky enough to avoid cancer so far, but I do know that any oncologist will agree that the cannabis herb is helpful, although it's no substitute for conventional treatment. It increases appetite for food and fosters restful sleep, very important for anyone fighting a dangerous disease. It also alleviates some of the side effects of conventional cancer treatments, like nausea. And it cultivates a healthy contempt for anything that is a source of stress or worry, principal causes of those pesky proliferations of swollen tissue, worry which is only exacerbated by being diagnosed as cancer by people with medical doctorates. It also provides a welcome distraction from morbid contemplation of cancer, and has actual anti-carcinogenic properties that have yet to be fully researched. I hope that helps. Possibly you already knew this.

 

[Sunny13111]

Boo still here still waiting. Trying not to let this all get to me. Trying to distract myself with decorating stuff for Christmas for my boys. I am so fed up with waiting for on op as I get bigger. Want to give up.sometimes but know I can't for my beautiful kids - still surviving. Have this weird feeling I can shake like these are my last months but I don't know why. Anyway. Still here. Hope you're all ok too 😘 and thank-you for the advice @steppenwolf.

 

[carac]

Good too see you back. Well... I mean not good because your op got delayed but if you can do this then I can easily. I don't really plan on going anyway so see you next week :)

Oh wait I read this wrong I thought it was one check in per week, I am such a dummy. Well keep going, one day at a time

 

[Sunny13111]

Good too see you back. Well... I mean not good because your op got delayed but if you can do this then I can easily. I don't really plan on going anyway so see you next week :)

Oh wait I read this wrong I thought it was one check in per week, I am such a dummy. Well keep going, one day at a time

Hehe your not a dummy! Let's go per week then minimum ☺️ ps you can do this ❤️

 

[SleepySept]

I will continue.
I am also alive. I did not expect myself to make it to 18– I remember turning 13 and being deathly afraid of what being an adult would be like. I figured it would be extremely stressful having to figure out how to survive financially independent and all, and I’m currently living up to those fears with the stress of college applications and how I’ll be able to pay for it. But, alas, I’m still here, grasping at straws for reasons to live, and I suppose that will do for the moment.

Are you me? That’s exactly how I feel lol (I swore at the beginning of middle school I’d kill myself before I turned 18, but I’m 18 now). Except the difference is I’m not going to college currently because I don’t know what I’ll do there, and am just mindlessly doing an event security job while I figure things out.

My first day was chaotic as all fuck (at a Coldplay concert, and I was working traffic for pedestrians). And I disassociated the whole day. But I was happy that I didn’t feel incompetent because my coworkers also struggled because we were given no information by our higherups. I had a breakdown the next day but I was relieved I was capable of something basic.

Every adult around me told me to enjoy my childhood while I could, that it’ll get much harder. But as a kid who’s never had any attachment to life due to household trauma, I kept wondering how can it get even worse than this? So I was scared of being an adult and getting a job. I do believe adulthood gives you a sort of strong freedom though.

It so will do. I'm impressed owano. You're inspiring. Well done my lovely for still being here. I feel you pain and struggle and I'm not just saying this. Can I ask you a question? I'm going to have a big op soon for my cancer and can't work out how to fill my time when recovering. I have adhd, depression and the rest and I'm one actually scared I'll die opposed to wanting it (have tried a few times in my life) and that mainly.due to having kids now. How will I stay still? Ps thanks for being you. Human, kind and just you.

I also have a tumor myself (brain tumor). I haven’t had any surefire calls for an operation so can’t give advice on that. But I was hospitalized while my brain was all funky, and what helped me was treating myself! I’d normally feel so guilty, but I felt like I deserved it even if only in that moment.