Surprised myself

[Nitromask]

I've never really been the type to have 'hobbies', but recently I've gotten into road cycling, and I'm genuinely surprised how much less I've been thinking about CTBing.

I have an addictive/obsessive personality - for a long time I've been addicted to / obsessed with finding the best way to end my life, but the last couple of months I've been addicted to perfecting my bike set-up and beating my personal records on Strava segments on my local roads/trails lol. I think cycling is a great hobby for someone like me, because there's always the next part of your set-up to obsess over.

I'm not saying I never think about CTBing anymore, but this is probably the first time I've visited this site in probably 2 months, a change from visiting multiple times a day.

I do wonder how long this will last and whether it's just a temporary band-aid solution, but I guess we'll see...

Anyway - this was probably neither interesting nor helpful to anybody....but thought I'd share...

 

[RecycledAtoms]

Very interesting indeed. It shows how powerful the human mind really is.

 

[Temporarilyabsurd]

Inspiring stuff!

I used to do about ten k's each way to school .

I was a GOD ! ( I was so fucked in the head , but those endorphins ( not that I knew at the time of course ) and the empowerment of beating the bus ( suckers ! ) was fantasic !

I live about twenty k's from the nearest town now ... and fantasize about doing the bike thing .

Awesomely inspiring , thanks .

 

[Nitromask]

Very interesting indeed. It shows how powerful the human mind really is.

Inspiring stuff!

I used to do about ten k's each way to school .

I was a GOD ! ( I was so fucked in the head , but those endorphins ( not that I knew at the time of course ) and the empowerment of beating the bus ( suckers ! ) was fantasic !

I live about twenty k's from the nearest town now ... and fantasize about doing the bike thing .

Awesomely inspiring , thanks .

Thanks guys!

If anything I've probably been overdoing it, so I'm giving myself a couple of rest days currently (hence why I had the down time and ended up on here lol). Doing about approx 200km a week. I just hope I can keep it up. I'm even planning on doing a few charity rides next year to give me something to work towards (and they are long after my previously envisioned CTB date, so that's progress)

PS @Temporarilyabsurd - you should definitely start up again! Maybe we can start a trend and end up with our own cycling sub-forum hahah

 

[Whitewash11235814]

Exercise releases endorphins and pent-up stress/anger. More should try exercise + good diet before making their decision firm. Don't stop with cycling. Since you're feeling a bit better than you did 2 months ago, try to take advantage of it in every way you can. Go to social gatherings, meet people, go for drinks, learn different stuff, join groups, etc.

My advice is don't wait for the feelings of ctb to resurface.

 

[Nitromask]

It's funny I hadn't even thought of the endorphins side of things (duh). I'd literally been thinking of it in the sense of it was taking up a whole bunch of time so I probably didn't have time to feel suicidal. It's obviously a mixture of both now that I think about it.

I am thinking of joining a local cycling club since I don't really know anyone in my area (moved from another country)

 

[Temporarilyabsurd]

PS @Temporarilyabsurd - you should definitely start up again! Maybe we can start a trend and end up with our own cycling sub-forum hahah

One of my dreams is to cycle the world ( well , my local world ) doing WWOOF'ing or whatever ( something to reduce accomodation costs ) ...

The rise of the cyclists !

 

[OreoWellington]

So happy for you. :)

 

[Nitromask]

One of my dreams is to cycle the world ( well , my local world ) doing WWOOF'ing or whatever ( something to reduce accomodation costs ) ...

The rise of the cyclists !

Funny you should mention that - just today I was watching a video about Jenny Graham, fastest woman to cycle around the world. She slept in public toilets and bus stops, but that might be a bit extreme haha.

Where in the world are you located? One of the charity rides I was thinking of doing next year is 545 miles from San Francisco to LA

 

[Temporarilyabsurd]

New Zealand .

That sounds like a hell of a ride !

( I have to summon the stamina to make a sandwich at the moment , so a few times around the block will
have to do for starters for me . )

I've followed you to remind myself of the good vibes man !

 

[Nem]

Love cycling, have honestly cycled over 160k kms. Sold my madone when I just felt like it was over, still have a few bikes but I'm just fucked. All the best

 

[Final Escape]

I know I have spent too much time on here as of late. It flared back up, probably because it's winter and some relationships have been strained or dissolving. So it triggered the abandonment depression and suicidal ideation I saw what therapy costs around here per session I guess I might be able to afford it. The therapy under the state is more difficult to access and there's long waits, basically the state controls what u can access, under what conditions, limits on how often things like that.

That's not good when u need to see someone at least twice a week and u need to get in there quick. I was going to go to an outpatient addiction treatment place through Medicaid but it was so far away from where I live that I didn't think it was realistic because it requires a lot of time commitment plus it's really far in heavy traffic. I was like fuck if they made like more locations?