Trashcan
Trash
- Aug 31, 2018
- 1,234
Who here is leaving a suicide note, and what are you including?
Just to my mother and sister. I'm including my reasons why I did it. My bank information and how I want to be cremated to make it cheap. Tell them how much they meant to me and thank them for being there as much as they could. Maybe a last page full of sincere apologies for being a frail and pathetic human being who just felt trapped.
AceOfSpadesCTB
Member
- Oct 9, 2018
- 34
I don't plan on leaving one. Nothing I can say would get through to my family due to religious reasons, so I just don't think it's worth it.
Sorry to hear about that. I wish there wasn't so much disconnect with loved ones.
Lra888
Enlightened
- Sep 30, 2018
- 1,140
I am. I'm including my reasons : chronic untreatable depression and all of the problems it causes which leads to being unable to live a decent life. That I hope everyone understands that i'm content and calm with this decision & I'm not upset with anyone and I hope they're not upset with me.
I have the basic note complete but i keep revising it as i'm trying to make a balance of explanation and not upsetting people with depressing details. I want it to be slightly upbeat so people are less upset after reading it.
My note is more of a small book, considering how lengthy it is. I am including the very few moments in life I can remember fondly (or not so fondly), my reasons for wanting to die, my desires as unrealistic as they might sound to others, my favorite songs, people and things, brief thoughts on the people who I had significant interactions with in the past (such as "family", some pseudo-friends, etc) and trying my best to make sure no one blames themselves for my death, as it is no one's fault.
My death is ultimately a good thing for me, and I hope people can at least begin to understand that my death will be the moment I will shine the brightest in this life. There are no reasons to be sad about it.
I will upload the "book" in a site I plan to purchase (for a couple of years, at least - maybe 3) before I die, for anyone who is interested to read. I will not be including personal notes to important people in the site, of course, but the little notes are like 10% of the whole thing.
Also,
I think this post by SamK has interesting ideas for what to put in a suicide note, if anyone is struggling with it.
My death is ultimately a good thing for me, and I hope people can at least begin to understand that my death will be the moment I will shine the brightest in this life. There are no reasons to be sad about it.
I will upload the "book" in a site I plan to purchase (for a couple of years, at least - maybe 3) before I die, for anyone who is interested to read. I will not be including personal notes to important people in the site, of course, but the little notes are like 10% of the whole thing.
Also,
I think this post by SamK has interesting ideas for what to put in a suicide note, if anyone is struggling with it.
Revok
Member
- Oct 6, 2018
- 69
I might write a note, but to be honest everyone I care about already knows I'm suicidal and why, so I'm not sure what the worth of it is. If they want to know details about how I feel they can ask me now.
A sensible note might be how I regret not being able to die peacefully in a comfortable place surrounded by loved ones, but instead will have had to seek out some secluded place, hidden away like a criminal afraid of being caught, stressed and alone.
A sensible note might be how I regret not being able to die peacefully in a comfortable place surrounded by loved ones, but instead will have had to seek out some secluded place, hidden away like a criminal afraid of being caught, stressed and alone.
Trashcan
Trash
- Aug 31, 2018
- 1,234
I'll definitely write one. My handwriting is pretty bad, but eligible. I'll just plan it out in advance before I write it down. I could type it, but I want the police to see that the handwriting on my note matches the handwriting in my notes for school.
I'll include:
How to contact my work and school. It's a small college so I don't think they'll notice too much, and it's past the drop date, but maybe they'll get a refund or partial refund or something if I die.
My bank account information so they can have access to my funds.
A brief explanation of why I did it. I might also include the David Foster Wallace quote and explain my "flames."
I figure they'll do whatever they want with my body, but I'll maybe suggest cremation or something because it's less expensive.
Then I considered giving the contact information of my friends, but figured the people who would care about my death would reach out to me on their own at some point in time. Or my family can go through my contact list if they want and be able to know who my friends are based on who I've told them. It's an embarrassingly low list, and there are two people that I am not sure if they'd care to know or not.
I'll include:
How to contact my work and school. It's a small college so I don't think they'll notice too much, and it's past the drop date, but maybe they'll get a refund or partial refund or something if I die.
My bank account information so they can have access to my funds.
A brief explanation of why I did it. I might also include the David Foster Wallace quote and explain my "flames."
I figure they'll do whatever they want with my body, but I'll maybe suggest cremation or something because it's less expensive.
Then I considered giving the contact information of my friends, but figured the people who would care about my death would reach out to me on their own at some point in time. Or my family can go through my contact list if they want and be able to know who my friends are based on who I've told them. It's an embarrassingly low list, and there are two people that I am not sure if they'd care to know or not.
RM5998
Sack of Meat
- Sep 3, 2018
- 2,202
5 delayed emails to people I think of as friends. There's not much to say, but there's a part of me that feels I owe them an explanation of sorts.
I wish I had the wherewithal and the eloquence necessary to write something that would give them closure and something better to remember me by. I don't want them to remember the husk of a person that I've been for so long.
I wish I had the wherewithal and the eloquence necessary to write something that would give them closure and something better to remember me by. I don't want them to remember the husk of a person that I've been for so long.
I thought about it for a long time, and decided against leaving a note. There's nothing to say to anyone that'll make things better. And I don't want to write a bunch of lies in order to make my parents feel better.
There is one girl who I'd like to know about it, and how much better she made me feel while we were together, but she's happy now, and I don't want to spoil it for her. She may misinterpret my intent, and think that I'm somehow blaming her for my decision. People don't react well to suicides.
There is one girl who I'd like to know about it, and how much better she made me feel while we were together, but she's happy now, and I don't want to spoil it for her. She may misinterpret my intent, and think that I'm somehow blaming her for my decision. People don't react well to suicides.
anthomaniac
Member
- Oct 10, 2018
- 40
i definetely will leave a note. Well multiple long ones to the people that had been close to me all this time, not as much for explainig, but for apologizing and for not being ever strong enough to pull myself (since they all know how bad i am). For my parents i don't think i'll leave much, i don't have a bank account nor anything of importance to tell them on how to use it, i'll maybe leave my phone unblocked and tell them to call certain people to inform them (since i can't really stand the thought of ghosting on two specific persons that were basically the good parents i never had).
For someone in specific (my ex lover...) i'll leave a small notebook i've kept as a diary since i was with him till even after he broke up with me, there he would find everything more detailed, i know it could be more traumathizing to him but he deserves to know better than anyone why i did what i did.
For someone in specific (my ex lover...) i'll leave a small notebook i've kept as a diary since i was with him till even after he broke up with me, there he would find everything more detailed, i know it could be more traumathizing to him but he deserves to know better than anyone why i did what i did.
RM5998
Sack of Meat
- Sep 3, 2018
- 2,202
I'm in a similar situation, but I'm undecided on whether I should send her anything or not (we're currently on opposite sides of the globe). I don't know if, when and how she'll find out about me, and if she'll even care. I feel that if she still remembers me as a friend rather than an acquaintance, I owe her some explanation due to what I'd told her about my desire to CTB when we closer, but I wonder if I should just wing it and hope that she forgets that I existed. And then there's also the part of me that doesn't really want to be forgotten by her.
Rocky M
I'm A Monster
- Jun 20, 2018
- 213
I won't be leaving a note, but I will say a subtle goodbye to my soccer team (we have a large group chat. It's turning into a meme cesspool though). I'll just tell them I won't be coming back next season. I would never tell such a wonderful group my true intentions of course
I've told people for years that I hate living. That's my note.
I don't care about anyone, nor do I see a point as I will be dead.
I am sending a note on delay to my ex fiancée but that's it. I am ready to go.
onewayroad
“Dying is not a crime.” ― Jack Kevorkian
- Oct 4, 2018
- 358
I made a promise to myself that I would try every treatment available before I ctb. So unfortunately, I have to continue existing for a while longer. But I decided to make use of that time and write a personal letter to everyone important in my life. It turns out that is a lot of people. I must be lucky. But it's going to be a lot of work to write 35 suicide notes.
Ah well, maybe the fact that I took the time to write 35 suicide notes will help convince people that I made a well thought out decision.
Ah well, maybe the fact that I took the time to write 35 suicide notes will help convince people that I made a well thought out decision.
Trashcan
Trash
- Aug 31, 2018
- 1,234
Glad you have 35 people you care about and hopefully you find happiness either way.
onewayroad
“Dying is not a crime.” ― Jack Kevorkian
- Oct 4, 2018
- 358
Thanks. I believe that I have had an incredibly fortunate life, full of friends, love and adventure. Unfortunately my brain is fucked and so I am always suffering to some extent. At least if I ctb I will feel like I haven't missed out on anything, I have lead a full life and I am satisfied. But I really hope I can find treatment that works so I don't have to ctb.
I really need to spend more time on those letters though, so fucking many.
deathoverlife
life is fleeting.....
- Oct 8, 2018
- 197
My number is 9 and am half way thru ...might add one or two more by the time am done.. mostly hand written ..few emails with delayed delivery ...will send them before I ctb
Evrey treatment available? You are going to cause yourself massive brain damage in an attempt to want to live life?
nzdarkshark
The Loved Mistake
- Sep 4, 2018
- 400
Leaving one - just with my reasons and what I want done with my body/stuff after I'm gone.
worldexploder
Visionary
- Sep 19, 2018
- 2,821
I wrote a "death note" for when I die - ether by suicide or natural causes. It contains my belief on life in general as well as suggestions to save on money - such as having a family reunion styled picnic instead of an epensive funeral. I personally don't believe in cemeteries because it's a very poor use of land, so I suggested to be cremated and my organs donated if that is possible. It's sort of cold yet to the point.
