Maybe it is, but so what? We've all been the object of selfishness. I thought my second wife and I had a solid marriage and a solid partnership. But one day a large investment went sour and she decided she wasn't committed to the marriage any more. So who's to say what's selfish and what isn't. And if it is selfish, so what?
I think it's selfish to people that loved you and done nothing wrong against you. In my case, I would be very selfish to my parents and my dog
My mom passed a year ago. It would have been inconceivable to do this to her. Now, I think of it as getting to join her.
Selfish its a subjective term that people use to put blame on you. If anything, isnt it selfish when someone couldnt possibly understand you, doesnt want to feel the pain of losing you?
Life is about making your own decisions, you dont live because of other people. That being said, you seem quite affected by emotions right now. Dont make quick decisions, take your time. If anything, if your second wife left you only because of that bad invenstment than maybe its for the best. Maybe she just waited for the right opportunity to avoid guilt. Using my own life as an example, we put too much weight on single occasions/ideas and they eats from inside.
If it was meant to be with your second wife, an investement would have never been an obstacle.
Life is about making your own decisions, you dont live because of other people. That being said, you seem quite affected by emotions right now. Dont make quick decisions, take your time. If anything, if your second wife left you only because of that bad invenstment than maybe its for the best. Maybe she just waited for the right opportunity to avoid guilt. Using my own life as an example, we put too much weight on single occasions/ideas and they eats from inside.
If it was meant to be with your second wife, an investement would have never been an obstacle.
Wise words. But when you get to a certain age and a certain point, what does it matter?
I am "only" 29 and I am a user in a forum about suicide. Each of us decides what "certain" age means. One thing is for sure, its a lot more easier to give wise advices to other people than applying them on ourselfs. Lately I have difficulty doing the later, I certanly hope that you have better success
First loss
Specialist
- Jan 28, 2019
- 393
Everybody is selfish. In fact, people do each and every thing just to benefit themselves.
SelfHatingAspie
Ambitious but rubbish
- Jul 2, 2019
- 198
It's no more selfish than expecting someone else who is in existential pain to keep living, just because you can't bear the thought of losing them. Your second wife appears to be the selfish one.
It's not selfish. It's just people who want to feel bad with yourself. The really selfish people are the one who say to you, you are selfish.
Anyone who wants to suicide, thinks about everyone before doing it. The loved ones, hated, who depends on us, etc.
Sometimes we think it is the better for everyone, not just me. It's like going to the dentist : it's a small pain to avoid a greater pain.
But, it must not be done to hurt anyone emotionally. It must be done because of the suffering, emptiness, lack of life, problems that overcomes me.
Now I have to select between living with help of the state, without friends, with family that are angry with me, with people who thinks I'm a parasite, with pain emotionally and physically or dying.
There are many schools of thought on selfish, with some philosophers thinking every action is selfish. Regardless most philosophers think being selfish Is a good thing in many cases.
I think you are applying a egocentric fairytale world view that the universe revolves around magical humans and everyone is super important.
Fragile
Broken
- Jul 7, 2019
- 1,496
i think both sides are equally as selfish.
sure, it goes case by case, but the people that want you alive just want to avoid the suffering of loosing you and the grieving process even if it means a shit lifetime for you, and suicidal people want to end their suffering even if it means a couple of years of pain for others.
us humans are extremely selfish by nature, so at the end of the day, don't feel too bad about it, only you can judge your own actions.
sure, it goes case by case, but the people that want you alive just want to avoid the suffering of loosing you and the grieving process even if it means a shit lifetime for you, and suicidal people want to end their suffering even if it means a couple of years of pain for others.
us humans are extremely selfish by nature, so at the end of the day, don't feel too bad about it, only you can judge your own actions.
TheFriendlyGh0st
Member
- Dec 24, 2018
- 15
Personally I think it's selfish to force someone to live miserably for the rest of their natural lifespan. Yeah maybe they feel better with me around, but I'm going to be suffering for decades because of it. Why is their (relatively temporary) pain more important than the pain that I am guaranteed to feel over the next 30-50 years?
