Green Destiny
Life isn't worth the trouble.
- Nov 16, 2019
- 875
I'll start this thread off with stating that it's been some time since I've been here on SaSu, hope you all have been doing well. The caveat as to why is because for the first time in a long time I don't feel all that suicidal.
I haven't gone to any therapy or have taken any meds but I think a huge change in my brain has happened: and that is I've been in taking a lot more pornography. Thing is that this isn't exactly new for me, although I did have a few stretches of abstaining from porn for a handful of months off and on last year.
And now it's come roaring back to the forefront, alarmingly so. I'm certainly not proud nor will I disclose what I've looked at but it's lead me down a rather unpleasant path, one that I'm worried I'll never be able to truly walk away from. But I want to stop or at least cut back significantly on my porn usage. As I said I was able to go a few months without looking porn up but now I can only go about 5 days before relapsing. I somewhat had this problem under control and now I barely have a grip on it.
To end this thread (TMI warning) I guess I'm what you call a gooner, who prolongs self pleasure for very long intervals as a form of euphoria. Sorry if I made anyone uncomfortable with this thread, this isn't something I was all that keen on sharing despite the anonymity this place provides.
I haven't gone to any therapy or have taken any meds but I think a huge change in my brain has happened: and that is I've been in taking a lot more pornography. Thing is that this isn't exactly new for me, although I did have a few stretches of abstaining from porn for a handful of months off and on last year.
And now it's come roaring back to the forefront, alarmingly so. I'm certainly not proud nor will I disclose what I've looked at but it's lead me down a rather unpleasant path, one that I'm worried I'll never be able to truly walk away from. But I want to stop or at least cut back significantly on my porn usage. As I said I was able to go a few months without looking porn up but now I can only go about 5 days before relapsing. I somewhat had this problem under control and now I barely have a grip on it.
To end this thread (TMI warning) I guess I'm what you call a gooner, who prolongs self pleasure for very long intervals as a form of euphoria. Sorry if I made anyone uncomfortable with this thread, this isn't something I was all that keen on sharing despite the anonymity this place provides.
