As somebody whose field of research in grad school was 20th-century Brazilian history, I rather admire the end of President Getúlio Vargas' 1954 suicide note/political manifesto, the
Carta Testamento:
Each drop of my blood will be an immortal flame in your conscience and will uphold the sacred will to resist. To hatred I reply with pardon, and to those who think they have defeated me, I reply with my victory. I was a slave to the Brazilian people, and today I am freeing myself for eternal life. But this people, whose slave I was, will no longer be slave to anyone. My sacrifice will remain forever in their souls and my blood will be the price of their ransom. I fought against the exploitation of Brazil. I fought against the exploitation of her people. I have fought with my whole heart. Hatred, infamy and slander have not conquered my spirit. I have given you my life. Now I offer you my death. I fear nothing. Serenely I take my first step towards eternity and leave life to enter history.
I also have become a bit obsessed with watching the video of the hanging suicide of Batalibh, the young Syrian woman who ctb in 2012. Every time she begins to exhibit the decortate and decerebrate posturing, I begin to pray for her soul. When she is finally still, I hope that she is at peace in Heaven. I wonder whether when and if I ctb by hanging, I should film it. Of course, a fat middle-aged woman like me is not likely to be the most attractive of dying people -- not like the young and pretty Batalibh. But if the camera were focused on my face (unlike the video of the death of Batalibh, whose facial expressions one can barely see once she begins to hang), then perhaps I might immortalize that pallid and placid countenance that I am hoping to have in death (I hope that my face while dying would not contort unpleasantly): people might also be able to determine when my soul left my body (which might be an interesting field of speculation).