Discussion suggestions for stuff to write in my suicide note(s)

[waistcoat]

hi all, it's getting to that time where i'm writing my goodbye notes to friends, family, loved ones, you get the idea.

i plan to write quite a few personal and individual notes to friends, that just express how much i love them and have appretiated everything they have done for me, so i don't need advice on those, but for my "final goodbye" note which will probably be shared with quite a few people, what do i put?? am i supposed to say why i'm choosing this? like, what's supposed to go in there? are they supposed to be explainations or things to comfort those that we leave behind??

any and all help appretiated, thank you

 

[galaxid]

A note like this is the very last thing you'll ever be able to say to the people reading it. I've lost people before (they did not ctb) and I wish so much that I could have known what they believed about me, about the world or whatever, before they died. I used to reread the last messages I exchanged with them, but after a while it hurt too much, because there's no conclusion or closure here. Just silence.

So my advice is: tell them what you want them to know. And if you have nothing to say, don't feel compelled to meet someone else's criteria for what you should write. That's just my opinion!!

I'm writing a bunch of meandering journal entries at the moment that I may or may not share (probably will). I like the thought of sharing a bunch of stuff over writing a single, concise note because there's no way I could ever compress what I want to say in something I could write in a day. Or a week. Or a month. I want the people I care about to have a lot to look at. I hope it'll help them understand this was not something anyone could have prevented. I worry about their grief-- and conveying this is important to me, even if (in reality) it won't do much to change what I'm about to put them through.

 

[waistcoat]

A note like this is the very last thing you'll ever be able to say to the people reading it. I've lost people before (they did not ctb) and I wish so much that I could have known what they believed about me, about the world or whatever, before they died. I used to reread the last messages I exchanged with them, but after a while it hurt too much, because there's no conclusion or closure here. Just silence.

So my advice is: tell them what you want them to know. And if you have nothing to say, don't feel compelled to meet someone else's criteria for what you should write. That's just my opinion!!

I'm writing a bunch of meandering journal entries at the moment that I may or may not share (probably will). I like the thought of sharing a bunch of stuff over writing a single, concise note because there's no way I could ever compress what I want to say in something I could write in a day. Or a week. Or a month. I want the people I care about to have a lot to look at. I hope it'll help them understand this was not something anyone could have prevented. I worry about their grief-- and conveying this is important to me, even if (in reality) it won't do much to change what I'm about to put them through.

thank you, thank you a lot for writing this. i didn't mention it in my post but i am actually also doing some kinda journal thing where i just write out my thoughts, i plan to share mine with friends :]

 

[TornReality]

I've thought about this.
But I'm skeptical about it.
I view things a bit differently, where, if I don't exist, you don't exist. So what would a note do? It wouldn't exist.
But I also wonder, what if those exist even after your passing? The not would exist.
I'd say write out your feelings... explain why you did what you did. And let the people you left know how you feel about them.

 

[IDontKnowEverything]

Is there anything or anyone you want us to take care of or look out for?
Any regrets we can help with? Any regrets in general?
That one's up to you though. You can make your note as short or how long you want it, if there's any time where at least in my opinion you shouldn't limit yourself too much, it would be here.
I'm trying to think of something good that they can and don't have to take care of of mine that could bring them a feeling of closure if they want it.
A final request of sort, not one that'd matter too much to me ig but they are the important ones here.
Did you try to seek help or talk to anyone about your feelings?
Were you hiding your pain from us?
Why did you decide to take your own life? Was there something specific that triggered this decision?
You don't have to answer that specifically but, while writing, see if you can be the most honest version of yourself.
I am imagining that some of these questions would have been asked. Anything to alleviate the self blame really.
Personally I've lost before, but not always without a word. I'm one of the lucky people who got closure even while they were alive. It does help accept everything, but it also pushes you closer to the edge too.
It's a good thing that you are writing a note, a final goodbye.
My best advice is be as honest as you can.
If it takes more than one take then so be it.
But personally I'd take whatever any of my dead loved ones would give me. The scrapped suicide notes too, I'd treasure everything of theirs dearly, the good, the bad, all of it I'd have treasured closely until I dissipate as well.