Substance for a sweet send off

[FreeGiven]

I am turning 20 in a few weeks here. I will be having a small birthday party. I will make sure it's a really really fun one, and then, once everyone's gone home, I CTB. As a means of ending things on a high note. I want to take a very large dose of something very pleasurable and let it kick in before shooting myself. In my shoes, what would be your choice of substance? At the moment all I have access to is alcohol and marijuana. But I can probably obtain whatever. It has to make the end feel very bright and not scary or depressing. And it can't fuck up my motor control so I aim correctly. I have no tolerances to anything so keep that in mind.

 

[lna_]

if i could get anything i would get fentanyl. i would buy it a few times from a dealer to not raise suspicion and then take it all at once. it probably would mess up your aim but i think it's so deadly in high amounts that you probably wouldn't need to do anything more than take it unless you wanted to.

 

[FreeGiven]

if i could get anything i would get fentanyl. i would buy it a few times from a dealer to not raise suspicion and then take it all at once. it probably would mess up your aim but i think it's so deadly in high amounts that you probably wouldn't need to do anything more than take it unless you wanted to.

I am a little shy about opiates because I had this giant surgery once and they had me on a very large dose of OxyContin. It didn't feel good at all but made me constantly nauseous and uncomfortable and I was constantly throwing up on it. Maybe I'd prefer an upper, idk

 

[lna_]

I am a little shy about opiates because I had this giant surgery once and they had me on a very large dose of OxyContin. It didn't feel good at all but made me constantly nauseous and uncomfortable and I was constantly throwing up on it. Maybe I'd prefer an upper, idk

oh thats interesting ive had the same with tramadol and oxycodone but i never connected that it's an opiate issue. i've always felt great with mdma but i do think it would affect your motor control esp combined with alcohol :/

i'm sorry i wish there were better options but i hope you find peace with whatever you decide to do.

 

[soontobedone]

I feel sorry for the people at your birthday party. They will be shocked and hurt I think.

 

[cfyzcfif]

My drug of choice would be some kind of opiate, especially stronger ones. I once took morphine 4 times in a row, tried to ctb, overdosed, but someone "saved" me. When I was on morphine my mind was in a very peaceful state and I was prepared, I don't remember if I had any side effects like nausea. As of now I don't have an access to morphine unfortunately, but I have an access to tramadol. It doesn't feel as good, I don't experience that "peaceful mind" state, it does have side effects, so, in my opinion stronger opiates is the way to go for me personally