Venting Strongly considering CTB

[DepressedAngel]

I know I shouldn't kill myself just because of a bad day, and things have been going better but.... I just saw my therapist and she told me again I am manipulative, don't want to get better, stubborn, and that I think I am above her. It's so frustrating and it makes me so sad! I really just want to get better. Everything she has told me to do hasn't helped me, so I do my own journaling, etc. And it helps, surprisingly. But then this happens and the thoughts are too much... I just want to die. My preferred method is hanging and I could easily do it tonight. I'm just very young and I don't know. What if I get through this hard time and it's okay? Or what if it keeps being like this? It's so much pain every day, and I have to pretend so much. I'm so tired of all of it. It makes me just want to die. Please tell me what I should do, I don't trust myself right now.

 

[LMLN]

Please don't do anything impulsive. Can you find another therapist? It sounds like she is not helping you.
❤

 

[Ark]

If you have doubts don't do it. That is my opinion. CTB should only be when you are absolutely sure, everything planned out also. And especially never on impulse.

I am sorry for what you are going through. And I hope you find a way to better your situation. I would have to agree with looking for another therapist if possible.

I always support people's choice no matter what, but am also honest when someone asks what I think about something.

 

[SugarbushMtn]

Agreed, take a breather for a few days and see how you feel. Very tough but worth it.

 

[sleepy dog]

I know I shouldn't kill myself just because of a bad day, and things have been going better but.... I just saw my therapist and she told me again I am manipulative, don't want to get better, stubborn, and that I think I am above her. It's so frustrating and it makes me so sad! I really just want to get better. Everything she has told me to do hasn't helped me, so I do my own journaling, etc. And it helps, surprisingly. But then this happens and the thoughts are too much... I just want to die. My preferred method is hanging and I could easily do it tonight. I'm just very young and I don't know. What if I get through this hard time and it's okay? Or what if it keeps being like this? It's so much pain every day, and I have to pretend so much. I'm so tired of all of it. It makes me just want to die. Please tell me what I should do, I don't trust myself right now.

Document the date and time of that appointment. Document exactly what that therapist said. Get the needed forms to file a grievance. Fill them out using the documentation you kept and submit them. That therapist is unprofessional. They will continue to do this. They might also be lying on the documents they put in your file. If you don't do this, the problems they are creating for you right now will get much worse down the road.

 

[DepressedAngel]

Please don't do anything impulsive. Can you find another therapist? It sounds like she is not helping you.
❤

Unfortunately I can't switch :( thank you so much for responding though!