Stress

[Somethingswrong]

I was having a nice morning tho my husband was still in bed, I was eating breakfast and watching my favorite show when all of the sudden, I am hit with the biggest urge to ctb. Idk why, maybe it's a stress response? But it all happened during the week, doesn't mean that I was so stressed out that my body couldn't have a response until now bc I am still stressed, just about the stuff in my house now tho. I don't want to ctb I'm happy, I have a loving husband a house to ourselves and my cats. It kinda scared me when I had that feeling and I felt so bad bc I don't want to be another problem for him rn, he's going through a lot and I've been staying strong for him, idk what triggered it I'm just gonna say it was a stress response and leave it at that.

 

[Redacted24]

I can empathize with your sudden urge out of the blue. I get that too. It defies reason, and I'm glad I don't have easy access to anything to carry through.
I can't ascribe it to stress alone; I've had a tremendously stressful few weeks and when I checked my depression level yesterday it's the lowest it's been in months.
That seems counterintuitive but I think for me it's when I'm able to be more alone in my thoughts is when reality seeps through and the urge gets strongest.
But maybe that's just me.
It's good to be aware of what's going on when the urges come, because then you can remain in control. Kind of like getting "hangry" I think... I have to get something down before I act poorly to some poor bystander that doesn't warrant being the brunt of my grouchiness.