heirofvoid
Member
- Dec 20, 2021
- 71
Hello, it's been a while since I've posted here. I'm just coming back to finally let out some pent up feelings for months now. I'm still at my current job and I still really hate it. I want to quit already but where would I go after that? The only industry that will accept me is the BPO industry and my family wouldn't settle for anything less than that. I don't think I can go back to school yet either since I'm still afraid to go.
I had a coworker who got promoted 2 weeks ago. There were slots open for some department and I would have applied but I really have nothing to put in my resume and this is my first job. I don't even know what that department does, I just really want to stop doing calls. I didn't get to submit since the deadline was also just 2 days. Anyway, this coworker got promoted there and I was just so jealous. I'm not mad at them and I know they worked hard for that and they deserve it! But it makes me think that if they can do it then I should too but my self-esteem is just shit. Also, this coworker finished college anyway and had previous jobs before so of course they know what to do. If I submitted my resume I would have embarrassed myself because I still don't know how to be a normal adult. I still fuck up my job a lot and I've been here for 9 months. I thought if another department is hiring again then I'll just go ahead and try and see how it goes. I just don't have anyone to help me with this like I can't ask my family because they're all successful and I'm stuck with this shitty job probably for the rest of my life.
Honestly I don't know what other career I want. I'd be fine with working in a warehouse since I've heard it's one of the jobs where you rarely interact with people but I think they only take physically fit or strong people(based on what I saw from job hiring posts herein my country). Also, my family wouldn't like that. They want me to work in an office. I know someone will say "Oh stop thinking about your family then" I still live with them. If I don't I'd be so broke right now. I'm lucky that I still get to keep some of my salary since they still handle most fees/necessities though I almost give like half of my salary to help out lol but I can still earn.
I just really hate my job and want to get away from this. The only other career I'm thinking of is related to digital art but let's be honest I'm still shit at it and I barely have the motivation these days to improve it because I'm always tired from work. It's an endless cycle. I'm honestly giving suicide another try again at this point because I'm so tired of thinking. I have yet to find a method but now that I have money, I can definitely work on it. Yes, I've gone to a psychiatrist but honestly it's too hard for me to open up that they couldn't figure out what my main problem is also. Not their fault I'm just really bad at talking. I kinda gave up on the therapy part since the psychiatrists I talked too don't really know anything about art careers like I know they were just trying to help but their recommendations are just what usual people think what happens in the art industry.
Not really sure how to end this. I guess see you again in another 5-6 months if I'm still unsuccessful with my attempt.
I had a coworker who got promoted 2 weeks ago. There were slots open for some department and I would have applied but I really have nothing to put in my resume and this is my first job. I don't even know what that department does, I just really want to stop doing calls. I didn't get to submit since the deadline was also just 2 days. Anyway, this coworker got promoted there and I was just so jealous. I'm not mad at them and I know they worked hard for that and they deserve it! But it makes me think that if they can do it then I should too but my self-esteem is just shit. Also, this coworker finished college anyway and had previous jobs before so of course they know what to do. If I submitted my resume I would have embarrassed myself because I still don't know how to be a normal adult. I still fuck up my job a lot and I've been here for 9 months. I thought if another department is hiring again then I'll just go ahead and try and see how it goes. I just don't have anyone to help me with this like I can't ask my family because they're all successful and I'm stuck with this shitty job probably for the rest of my life.
Honestly I don't know what other career I want. I'd be fine with working in a warehouse since I've heard it's one of the jobs where you rarely interact with people but I think they only take physically fit or strong people(based on what I saw from job hiring posts herein my country). Also, my family wouldn't like that. They want me to work in an office. I know someone will say "Oh stop thinking about your family then" I still live with them. If I don't I'd be so broke right now. I'm lucky that I still get to keep some of my salary since they still handle most fees/necessities though I almost give like half of my salary to help out lol but I can still earn.
I just really hate my job and want to get away from this. The only other career I'm thinking of is related to digital art but let's be honest I'm still shit at it and I barely have the motivation these days to improve it because I'm always tired from work. It's an endless cycle. I'm honestly giving suicide another try again at this point because I'm so tired of thinking. I have yet to find a method but now that I have money, I can definitely work on it. Yes, I've gone to a psychiatrist but honestly it's too hard for me to open up that they couldn't figure out what my main problem is also. Not their fault I'm just really bad at talking. I kinda gave up on the therapy part since the psychiatrists I talked too don't really know anything about art careers like I know they were just trying to help but their recommendations are just what usual people think what happens in the art industry.
Not really sure how to end this. I guess see you again in another 5-6 months if I'm still unsuccessful with my attempt.
