Suicidebydeath
No chances to be happy - dead inside
- Nov 25, 2021
- 3,559
I know I'm going to get a ton of flak for this but as I'm not feeling comfortable on the forum anyway I do not see that it will make much difference. Without raising a furore of some kind it seems as if nothing will actually get done or change.
So first of all:
"Hi @Suicidebydeath. This situation has been discussed among Admins and Mods and we are taking appropriate actions in relation to the posts and threads that were involved and the member in question. We do apologise for the delay. As explained, we addressed this as a team and mods cannot act unilaterally without prior discussion. We need to assess serious allegations of bullying or harassment thoroughly as a team.Please note that we generally do not disclose the outcomes, provide proof of punishment or divulge exact details of our decisions to any parties involved. Please do not publicly engage with [REDACTED] going forward. He will also be told to not engage with your posts either.If there are further details you wish to report, separate incidents you wish to highlight or if you experience any further difficulties going forward, please report this to the Mod team. Thank you."
- I think this is pretty plain language. [REDACTED] should not engage with my posts. I'm still waiting for a reply from moderator team after more than 18 hours now.
Secondly, it seems as if its ok to be intolerant of and criticize one user, the same user that has been told repeatedly to either kill themself or ask why they've not done it yet, but its not ok to criticize the people that are making up lies, and continually bringing up said user in every other thread as often as possible, and derailing threads. In some threads literally I've seen the same two people in one of her vent threads go back and forth badmouthing people no less than six times in a row. It's an entire page. Under any other circumstances that would be considered extremely toxic and derailment. Go ahead and try to argue if you think that is ok and normal, acceptable behaviour.
Also, the bullying/harassment so far is tolerated, but an anti-bullying thread or positivity threads have been censored & locked. For the reason: it will cause more conflict and arguments. Isn't that putting the chicken before the egg? That does not seem like criticism is being fully enabled, it should be two-way. There is a lot of hypocrisy, about criticisms and tolerance. If criticism of one is allowed (as it should be, as long as its respectful), then so should criticism or just general positivity where nobody was being criticised at all. However it was not allowed and was locked, and the timing of the locking of the threads was just so that it was locked after some contentious posts before replies could be made. There is a consistent pattern of locking like this and it might be unfortunate in some cases but it is a consistent pattern nonetheless. That reeks of bias. I am not pointing the fingers at anyone right now publically but its something for the moderation team to investigate and address themselves.
There would not be constant conflicts & arguments if the aforementioned extreme behaviours were not tolerated to the degree they have been lately. Repeatedly telling the same user to ctb should be 100% intolerable, but I have only just today seen people make pathetic excuses, laugh and make light of it, and say that is not toxic. I think we've all heard the excuse "I was only joking" before too. I've also seen two simultaneous ongoing smear campaigns, one against Rain and it is exhausting her. It is really unfair that people having been making unchallenged statements that are just plain not true about some of the past moderation. Because of this I think it has become increasingly more difficult for the moderation team. I do not think it can be the fault of Rain. I've observed bias among a moderator and users posting similar profile posts within a certain group of people to curry favour.
When you hear about "crazy people", anywhere or say in domestic disputes, sometimes people do end up crazy, but its because the other person drove them crazy. They know how to hit all the right buttons so they can point at the other person and say "look at how bad they are", when they were the person initiating and instigating the abuse. I think it should be clear what is happening here to people in the know. I think at this point, a specific user is going to carry on until they get banned, and I think that is sad, because I think this experience has changed them.
I don't know how it can be any clearer than that. It should never be okay for someone who harassed someone to able to interfere with the victim again. Now I'm expecting lots of flak and toxicity from the usual crowd and that will prove me correct. Because nothing I have said is unreasonable. It is literally standard procedure.
So first of all:
"Hi @Suicidebydeath. This situation has been discussed among Admins and Mods and we are taking appropriate actions in relation to the posts and threads that were involved and the member in question. We do apologise for the delay. As explained, we addressed this as a team and mods cannot act unilaterally without prior discussion. We need to assess serious allegations of bullying or harassment thoroughly as a team.Please note that we generally do not disclose the outcomes, provide proof of punishment or divulge exact details of our decisions to any parties involved. Please do not publicly engage with [REDACTED] going forward. He will also be told to not engage with your posts either.If there are further details you wish to report, separate incidents you wish to highlight or if you experience any further difficulties going forward, please report this to the Mod team. Thank you."
- I think this is pretty plain language. [REDACTED] should not engage with my posts. I'm still waiting for a reply from moderator team after more than 18 hours now.
Secondly, it seems as if its ok to be intolerant of and criticize one user, the same user that has been told repeatedly to either kill themself or ask why they've not done it yet, but its not ok to criticize the people that are making up lies, and continually bringing up said user in every other thread as often as possible, and derailing threads. In some threads literally I've seen the same two people in one of her vent threads go back and forth badmouthing people no less than six times in a row. It's an entire page. Under any other circumstances that would be considered extremely toxic and derailment. Go ahead and try to argue if you think that is ok and normal, acceptable behaviour.
Also, the bullying/harassment so far is tolerated, but an anti-bullying thread or positivity threads have been censored & locked. For the reason: it will cause more conflict and arguments. Isn't that putting the chicken before the egg? That does not seem like criticism is being fully enabled, it should be two-way. There is a lot of hypocrisy, about criticisms and tolerance. If criticism of one is allowed (as it should be, as long as its respectful), then so should criticism or just general positivity where nobody was being criticised at all. However it was not allowed and was locked, and the timing of the locking of the threads was just so that it was locked after some contentious posts before replies could be made. There is a consistent pattern of locking like this and it might be unfortunate in some cases but it is a consistent pattern nonetheless. That reeks of bias. I am not pointing the fingers at anyone right now publically but its something for the moderation team to investigate and address themselves.
There would not be constant conflicts & arguments if the aforementioned extreme behaviours were not tolerated to the degree they have been lately. Repeatedly telling the same user to ctb should be 100% intolerable, but I have only just today seen people make pathetic excuses, laugh and make light of it, and say that is not toxic. I think we've all heard the excuse "I was only joking" before too. I've also seen two simultaneous ongoing smear campaigns, one against Rain and it is exhausting her. It is really unfair that people having been making unchallenged statements that are just plain not true about some of the past moderation. Because of this I think it has become increasingly more difficult for the moderation team. I do not think it can be the fault of Rain. I've observed bias among a moderator and users posting similar profile posts within a certain group of people to curry favour.
When you hear about "crazy people", anywhere or say in domestic disputes, sometimes people do end up crazy, but its because the other person drove them crazy. They know how to hit all the right buttons so they can point at the other person and say "look at how bad they are", when they were the person initiating and instigating the abuse. I think it should be clear what is happening here to people in the know. I think at this point, a specific user is going to carry on until they get banned, and I think that is sad, because I think this experience has changed them.
I don't know how it can be any clearer than that. It should never be okay for someone who harassed someone to able to interfere with the victim again. Now I'm expecting lots of flak and toxicity from the usual crowd and that will prove me correct. Because nothing I have said is unreasonable. It is literally standard procedure.
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