• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block. If you're located in the UK, we recommend using a VPN to maintain access.

K

Kennish

Specialist
Aug 17, 2021
379
So I'm thinking about alot lately to try to make decent memories with loved ones before I leave this place. There is gonna be some time before I get my N and leave this place.

Could it make it easier for the ones who love me, that they have spend time with me the last time before I leave?

I'm thinking maybe then they won't blame me as much. Even though I would like to not be blamed, because life here is hell for me, and I think I have made that clear for them.

What are your thoughts about this? Before you CTB, are you thinking about spending time and making decent memories with your loved ones?
 
  • Love
Reactions: patheticpartner and aviation
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,737
I'm not sure it would make it easier for them, I don't think anything would. Maybe a note might give them some closure, at least that is what I plan to do. I will say things like 'there is nothing you could have done' and 'now I am at peace'.
Before I ctb, I will distance myself from others as much as possible. It is tiring being around family members anyway, all they do is complain and talk non stop about boring things.
 
  • Like
Reactions: NoFutureAnymore, WrongPlaceWrongTime, ContinuousJump and 1 other person
K

Kennish

Specialist
Aug 17, 2021
379
I'm not sure it would make it easier for them, I don't think anything would. Maybe a note might give them some closure, at least that is what I plan to do. I will say things like 'there is nothing you could have done' and 'now I am at peace'.
Before I ctb, I will distance myself from others as much as possible. It is tiring being around family members anyway, all they do is complain and talk non stop about boring things.
Have you expressed your wish to not be here anymore? I have, and it seems like some people just act as they don't hear it.

How are you planning to CTB?
I don't know if I'm gonna be writing a note, because I think that would make it harder for me to CTB
 
Risperdead

Risperdead

Agenda 2030 Sustainable Death
Jul 20, 2021
49
for me as a targeted individual with no social contact to anyone and every aspect of life destroyed this question is not present. normally i would say having some last quality time with your loved once is decent. Kennish thanks for this thread and the food for thought which reminds me how much i want to die and leave this place for good. Ti diagram 4 2c 1 orig
 
  • Like
  • Aww..
Reactions: WrongPlaceWrongTime, ContinuousJump and Kennish
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,737
Have you expressed your wish to not be here anymore? I have, and it seems like some people just act as they don't hear it.

How are you planning to CTB?
I don't know if I'm gonna be writing a note, because I think that would make it harder for me to CTB
No, I keep everything to myself. There is no point in telling anybody else. They would try to stop me from doing it. They would not accept it.
I haven't fully decided on the method but it is likely to be hanging. It will probably be in years time though. It is difficult to ctb as we are programmed to survive. If it was easier I would already be gone.
 
K

Kennish

Specialist
Aug 17, 2021
379
for me as a targeted individual with no social contact to anyone and every aspect of life destroyed this question is not present. normally i would say having some last quality time with your loved once is decent. Kennish thanks for this thread and the food for thought which reminds me how much i want to die and leave this place for good.View attachment 75377
You're welcome, I guess?
for me as a targeted individual with no social contact to anyone and every aspect of life destroyed this question is not present. normally i would say having some last quality time with your loved once is decent. Kennish thanks for this thread and the food for thought which reminds me how much i want to die and leave this place for good.View attachment 75377
I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I hope you find peace whatever you do
No, I keep everything to myself. There is no point in telling anybody else. They would try to stop me from doing it. They would not accept it.
I haven't fully decided on the method but it is likely to be hanging. It will probably be in years time though. It is difficult to ctb as we are programmed to survive. If it was easier I would already be gone.
I just told a friend I'm thinking about it. He said he would not judge me, but would prefer that I didn't do it. Even if he did want to stop me it would be difficult, since he's about 6000 km away
You're welcome, I guess?

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I hope you find peace whatever you do

I just told a friend I'm thinking about it. He said he would not judge me, but would prefer that I didn't do it. Even if he did want to stop me it would be difficult, since he's about 6000 km away
I've actually expressed my feelings about it to several people. I don't know why. Maybe because I need to vent it. But I haven't been forced to a mental hospital or something like that by any of them
No, I keep everything to myself. There is no point in telling anybody else. They would try to stop me from doing it. They would not accept it.
I haven't fully decided on the method but it is likely to be hanging. It will probably be in years time though. It is difficult to ctb as we are programmed to survive. If it was easier I would already be gone.
Its so annoying we are programmed to surviving.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Risperdead, dyingalone123 and ContinuousJump
Beau

Beau

Student
Aug 30, 2021
100
I don't know if I'm gonna be writing a note, because I think that would make it harder for me to CTB

Writing a note for me is very important. I keep constantly revising it, and I think that process has helped clarify my own thoughts about it. I also wrote down "my story" (this is mentioned in the book "Five Last Acts" in the wiki) and that has helped bring some peace too, as a more permament record of my memories with family and friends.
 
K

Kennish

Specialist
Aug 17, 2021
379
Writing a note for me is very important. I keep constantly revising it, and I think that process has helped clarify my own thoughts about it. I also wrote down "my story" (this is mentioned in the book "Five Last Acts" in the wiki) and that has helped bring some peace too, as a more permament record of my memories with family and friends.
I wouldn't know where to start and where to end with a note
 
I

ItsTimeToExit

Live to die another day
Jul 20, 2021
99
Could it make it easier for the ones who love me, that they have spend time with me the last time before I leave?
It could if your note references it well.

Something like, "You may not feel it now but in the future you can look back on the time we spent together as a happy memory."

Or perhaps it won't work. People are weird in death I think.
I wouldn't know where to start and where to end with a note
First you need to answer a simple question.

Are you looking to provide closure or lay on the guilt and blame?
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Kennish
K

Kennish

Specialist
Aug 17, 2021
379
First you need to answer a simple question.

Are you looking to provide closure or lay on the guilt and blame?
Good question. To some degree I blame my parents. But I wouldn't know where to start and end and all in the middle. I think my mind would want me to include all the people I know. And it's kinds weird to be blaming some people and for the rest of the note, talking about love and good memories together.

Maybe it's best there's no note. At least right now I don't know what to include in that note.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Risperdead

Similar threads

Droso
Replies
3
Views
403
Suicide Discussion
LittleMagician
LittleMagician
Sergeant45
Replies
24
Views
946
Suicide Discussion
letmeseethedeath
letmeseethedeath
absolute_n0thing
Replies
23
Views
927
Suicide Discussion
Forveleth
F
Polyxo
Replies
8
Views
715
Suicide Discussion
usernamesarehard
usernamesarehard
realismangel
Replies
1
Views
264
Suicide Discussion
25dRvS9Ka
25dRvS9Ka