WitheringAway
Ima shake the champagne bottle...
- Jun 23, 2020
- 404
Hi so, a lot of you may not know what that means.. basically Eid is like a holiday for Muslims to celebrate the end of the fasting month "Ramdan".. I live in an Islamic country so as you can imagine everyone around me is celebrating being happy and buying things to celebrate (clothes, chocolate and candy etc) why it's triggering my suicide? Well; here's why:
1) I have to spend it with family and I'm not even Muslim and nobody knows.
2) my family dislike me and the feeling is mutual. As of right now, I don't have a single family member that I like
3) I have to get ready with new clothes do my hair makeup etc and fake celebrating.
4) I'll feel like a fraud all day who doesn't deserve to celebrate or be there cus I'll be acting as if I did fast the last month when in reality I didn't.
5) I have to meet relatives I haven't seen all year long and act as if I care how they're doing. I'll be fake all day.
6) I have to sit around spoiled loud obnoxious kids (which I pretty much dislike)
7) I'll have to help with making coffee and a giant breakfast and lunch
8) I'll get high on sugary sweets to cope
9) they'll play loud ass music and dance and it will trigger my migraine and I have to sit through it
Not to mention the eid prayer.. I'll have to fake praying with them.
I don't want to be a part of non of this I have no interest whatsoever but I feel like I must so my mom doesn't have a breakdown
My plan is to hang out with the maids at the kitchen as much as possible and pretend as if I'm helping all day so I don't have to sit around them much.
1) I have to spend it with family and I'm not even Muslim and nobody knows.
2) my family dislike me and the feeling is mutual. As of right now, I don't have a single family member that I like
3) I have to get ready with new clothes do my hair makeup etc and fake celebrating.
4) I'll feel like a fraud all day who doesn't deserve to celebrate or be there cus I'll be acting as if I did fast the last month when in reality I didn't.
5) I have to meet relatives I haven't seen all year long and act as if I care how they're doing. I'll be fake all day.
6) I have to sit around spoiled loud obnoxious kids (which I pretty much dislike)
7) I'll have to help with making coffee and a giant breakfast and lunch
8) I'll get high on sugary sweets to cope
9) they'll play loud ass music and dance and it will trigger my migraine and I have to sit through it
Not to mention the eid prayer.. I'll have to fake praying with them.
I don't want to be a part of non of this I have no interest whatsoever but I feel like I must so my mom doesn't have a breakdown
My plan is to hang out with the maids at the kitchen as much as possible and pretend as if I'm helping all day so I don't have to sit around them much.
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