Have you heard that song: "Send in the Clowns" by Frank Sinatra? "Isn't it rich, are we a pair? Me here at last on the ground, and you in mid-air. Send in the clowns..."
Yeah, love it.
Anyways, I'm still really hurt by this especially since they wanted to do a suicide pact and told me all this stuff but cheated on me with other guys here. Let them talk about creampieing in her and she would like the comments, let other guys make fun of me and would gaslight me when I felt insecure about it. This person didn't care about me or my will to die. Idk.
I feel like such a loser.
Man, I'm really sorry that happened. You're definitely not the loser. Someone who lets people publicly talk about doing stuff like that and who is okay with other's being mean to you sounds like more of a loser, tbh...
People here are hurting and looking for something to cling to, and often they'll pick something/someone awful that seems exciting. I personally don't get wanting to slobber over someone so crass and meritless. [I've seen it where the guy calls the girl latching onto them a racial slur regularly and posts about stuff like following random women IRL to see where they live and "jokes" about considering raping women. Just vile stuff, and that's only the tip of the iceberg, but someone hurting will see it as thrilling, I guess.] On the other hand, I don't get at all getting romantic feelings over an online forum like this and posting such stuff where people can see it in the first place. I do understand trying to connect with people, though.
someone dm'd me on one of my posts and at first i told them to leave me alone but then after being lonely for so long i apologized and we started talking more. especially on discord
I wish I had better advice. People who are in pain aren't always able to consider how others are feeling, so they may get what they can out of the relationship without considering that you were feeling a connection and thought there was trust and caring there. It always will suck to get ditched/betrayed that way. You have to be careful with who you trust but also don't want to just shut out everyone. It's a tough situation.
Also i don't see how cheating can be a bannable offense, we can't ban people for being shitty "partners" lol
Probably talking more about the bullying/sex talk but it seems like it was off-platform.