Venting so much hate

[hʚll]

yeah. so i try to be empathetic as much as i can towards anyone, even the prolifers (parents). but is really hard to deal with the anger and hate i feel from having been brought in here without choice, from being deprived of the freedom to stop the suffering. it feels like i'm chained on an electrical chair while being forced to feel the pain inside and around me, with no way to stop it. it makes me desperate. i feel so much hate towards them. every second i pass in this existence i feel more and more corrupted. i feel guilty of playing their game. i have been forced but that's not excuse for me to still be here. i try to not be impulsive and think before doing something. because if i don't think, i risk to fail my possibility to exit. i need to calm down but i feel like i want to hurt them.i want to hurt them like they did to me. i feel evil. just like them.
i want to stop all this before i explode. i just need some time

sorry for vent.
thanks ss.

 

[logan]

When you are so tense, exercise helps best.
I know this inner tension very well - it's almost unbearable.
And de-escalation is often the best strategy.

 

[CoolGuy9]

No need to be sorry about venting. Being able to say what you really feel is one of the best parts of this website.

I wish I had more to say other than I wish you luck, but I don't so I wish you luck, friend.

 

[hʚll]

When you are so tense, exercise helps best.
I know this inner tension very well - it's almost unbearable.
And de-escalation is often the best strategy.

i know you are trying to be helpful. but that's somehow tthe type of advice i would get from "normal" people? sorry. what i mean is just that my hate can't be dealed with exercise. is rooted in my mind

No need to be sorry about venting. Being able to say what you really feel is one of the best parts of this website.

I wish I had more to say other than I wish you luck, but I don't so I wish you luck, friend.

peace to you. thank you

 

[logan]

i know you are trying to be helpful. but that's somehow tthe type of advice i would get from "normal" people? sorry

You are right, of course.

But as long as you live with your parents, this is the best option.
And I know from my own experience that this is easier said than done.

And I really just want to help and not offend you.

 

[hʚll]

You are right, of course.

But as long as you live with your parents, this is the best option.
And I know from my own experience that this is easier said than done.

And I really just want to help and not offend you.

sorry if i sounded rude.
thank you for trying to help
peace

 

[Huntfish34]

I can certainly relate to the " playing their game " part. It's not at all easy to deal with, Especially with any kind of hate. It's terrible.

A lot of mine is self hatred,. But not all of it. There are still numerous people I have an Intense hatred for.

I wish you the best and hope you have a good day if possible.

 

[hʚll]

I can certainly relate to the " playing their game " part. It's not at all easy to deal with, Especially with any kind of hate. It's terrible.

A lot of mine is self hatred,. But not all of it. There are still numerous people I have an Intense hatred for.

I wish you the best and hope you have a good day if possible.

thank you. i hope the same for you and everyone else
peace(:

 

[BottomlessPit]

Trust me, you are not alone with your hatred towards prolifers (breeders, anti-choicers, etc). I've learned to despise these bastards, they are the reason for our predicament after all. It would be one thing if they were just ignorant, but they also force their outright retarded worldview onto us, which is nothing but infuriating und unjust.

Hate and frustration are the main emotions I feel, and I don't see how exercise is supposed to help either. The fact that I have to torture myself in an attempt to feel better afterwards again just reminds of why I hate existence.

 

[Meditation guide]

i want to hurt them like they did to me. i feel evil. just like them.

That's a lot of anger and the suggestion to exercise was simply a way to deal with it. Anger is energy that needs release. It's very uncomfortable to feel that. I'm not saying it's not justified. And of course you do need to vent.

Another thing is determining to not allow anyone to control your mind and emotions that way. Just some things to think about. You have control over your own mind. It's not something someone else forces on you, as much as you think or feel that way. And before you say this is normie talk I assure you I'm far from being a normie, just a fellow sufferer like you are.

 

[unperson]

Well I can speak to what's helped me:

Evil resides in the very gaze which perceives Evil all around itself.

Friedrich Hegel

aside from that there's something that is somewhat of a double edge sword that can impact your self control but also decrease anger/hate:

Spoiler: notions of...

Dispelling the belief in freewill & accepting that autonomy of choice is an illusion; unfortunately I used to use this idea to justify not trying to manage my anger, but now meditate on it to see humans as faultless creatures of complex patternistic programming

somewhat of a double edge sword that can impact your self control

however I'm very curious about the possibility of a contextual reframing that could have the opposite effect in this regard and augment someone's self-control/discipline/resolve.

going to start meditating again and do some self experiments to find out because I do want to know

Another thing is determining to not allow anyone to control your mind and emotions that way. Just some things to think about. You have control over your own mind. It's not something someone else forces on you, as much as you think or feel that way. And before you say this is normie talk I assure you I'm far from being a normie, just a fellow sufferer like you are.

In all honesty this might be a way better suggestion than my insane ideas lol; I think I'll try this recommendation myself because I want to know if maybe the seeming lack of control is caused by not believing that I have control, which would mean I've been causing myself way more misery than anyone else has caused me.

 

[hʚll]

Trust me, you are not alone with your hatred towards prolifers (breeders, anti-choicers, etc). I've learned to despise these bastards, they are the reason for our predicament after all. It would be one thing if they were just ignorant, but they also force their outright retarded worldview onto us, which is nothing but infuriating und unjust.

thank you. sometimes i try to think: they don't know better or hey they are victims too even if they don't realize it.. but it's so difficult to not hate them when they would do anything like step on our freedom, ignore/deny our suffering, mentally torture us, just to keep their idea of life safe..
i wish you peace soon, friend.

Well I can speak to what's helped me:


Friedrich Hegel

aside from that there's something that is somewhat of a double edge sword that can impact your self control but also decrease anger/hate:

Spoiler: notions of...

Dispelling the belief in freewill & accepting that autonomy of choice is an illusion; unfortunately I used to use this idea to justify not trying to manage my anger, but now meditate on it to see humans as faultless creatures of complex patternistic programming

however I'm very curious about the possibility of a contextual reframing that could have the opposite effect in this regard and augment someone's self-control/discipline/resolve.

going to start meditating again and do some self experiments to find out because I do want to know

In all honesty this might be a way better suggestion than my insane ideas lol; I think I'll try this recommendation myself because I want to know if maybe the seeming lack of control is caused by not believing that I have control, which would mean I've been causing myself way more misery than anyone else has caused me.

thank you for help. i have difficulty with the concept of freedom. but i know there is not someone to blame. it's just really tragic. and it makes me sad

That's a lot of anger and the suggestion to exercise was simply a way to deal with it. Anger is energy that needs release. It's very uncomfortable to feel that. I'm not saying it's not justified. And of course you do need to vent.

Another thing is determining to not allow anyone to control your mind and emotions that way. Just some things to think about. You have control over your own mind. It's not something someone else forces on you, as much as you think or feel that way. And before you say this is normie talk I assure you I'm far from being a normie, just a fellow sufferer like you are.

i don't know much about control of my mind. i try to learn about it.
i am sorry you are suffering too..

 

[FuneralCry]

Living can be painful. It is cruel how we were brought here without choice and denied the right to die, it is like being trapped. Having a peaceful way out should be a basic human right, we have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask for it. I'm sorry you are suffering so much, I wish you well.

 

[hʚll]

Living can be painful. It is cruel how we were brought here without choice and denied the right to die, it is like being trapped. Having a peaceful way out should be a basic human right, we have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask for it. I'm sorry you are suffering so much, I wish you well.

yeah. i agree with all you said. is so unfair.
thank you for your words. i wish you peace too