So many choices

[thetrout]

Sigh. I keep changing my mind. First it was inert gas. Then a firearm. I briefly flirted with SN, but abandoned it pretty quickly. Went back to inert gas, but with an EEBD hood this time, then scuba. Walking home from work the other day, hanging appealed to me, but after reading more about it, I soured on the idea (but I'm having second, third, and fourth thoughts about it). Heroin OD sounds OK, except I'd have no idea how to get anything like that.

Too many choices, all with their pros and cons. Obviously, I don't want to screw it up, so reliability is critical. I also don't want to suffer, so that's important, too. Then there's availability, which is its own set of hassles.

Anyway, I know everyone knows what I'm talking about. Nothing new or surprising here. I can't get a shotgun, but I might have access to a .357. Wonder if combining that with a hanging would be quick and reliable. I'll probably change my mind again tomorrow and think of something else.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really wish that it's easier to permanently be free from this existence, I hate how we exist in a world where suicide is purposely made so difficult, it shouldn't be difficult at all to die. But anyway I wish you the best with your plans.

 

[Sad Avocado]

Sigh. I keep changing my mind. First it was inert gas. Then a firearm. I briefly flirted with SN, but abandoned it pretty quickly. Went back to inert gas, but with an EEBD hood this time, then scuba. Walking home from work the other day, hanging appealed to me, but after reading more about it, I soured on the idea (but I'm having second, third, and fourth thoughts about it). Heroin OD sounds OK, except I'd have no idea how to get anything like that.

Too many choices, all with their pros and cons. Obviously, I don't want to screw it up, so reliability is critical. I also don't want to suffer, so that's important, too. Then there's availability, which is its own set of hassles.

Anyway, I know everyone knows what I'm talking about. Nothing new or surprising here. I can't get a shotgun, but I might have access to a .357. Wonder if combining that with a hanging would be quick and reliable. I'll probably change my mind again tomorrow and think of something else.

if i can ask, why did you decide to abandon sn?

 

[thetrout]

if i can ask, why did you decide to abandon sn?

Seems impossible to get,, and I'm not sure about its reliability.

 

[FireWalkWithMe]

Well, I guess you have at least identified the main obstacle. It's not methods. People always say it is the method but the cold, hard truth is it is usually not. Lurking beneath that is a fear and a survival instinct that makes all of the methods difficult and then you have to revert back to cycling through ideas to convince yourself you're doing okay with your plans. You convince yourself it is the pain and reliability even though in truth you will not have a clear idea of the pain or reliability and everything takes a leap of faith.

There is no weakness to be found in this, it is part of the human condition. It takes a lot to do it.

 

[thetrout]

Well, I guess you have at least identified the main obstacle. It's not methods. People always say it is the method but the cold, hard truth is it is usually not. Lurking beneath that is a fear and a survival instinct that makes all of the methods difficult and then you have to revert back to cycling through ideas to convince yourself you're doing okay with your plans. You convince yourself it is the pain and reliability even though in truth you will not have a clear idea of the pain or reliability and everything takes a leap of faith.

There is no weakness to be found in this, it is part of the human condition. It takes a lot to do it.

Yes. Really wise words. It's not the methods at all. Just fear and uncertainty.

 

[FireWalkWithMe]

Yes. Really wise words. It's not the methods at all. Just fear and uncertainty.

That's okay.

While you're in a state of uncertainty, the truth is you're not making a huge mistake. It may feel awful, like hell on earth, but it's not a big mistake because a few days, weeks, months, even years is nothing compared to eternity. Wheter you believe in life after death or a complete end that is still true.

The big mistake is when people do it on a whim, under the influence or without really considering it. Or at least that's a potential for a big mistake.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Seems impossible to get,, and I'm not sure about its reliability.

It does seem like it's getting harder and harder to get. I will say, though, that most of the failed SN attempts on this site have (at least that I've noticed in my time here) been people who were found or who didn't follow the regimen. Those who follow it and ensure they can't be found for a few hours usually end up being successful.

I bring it up only because it seems like it might check off some of your other boxes. It's relatively less agonizing than other methods and failure is unlikely to lead to any long-term complications. So if reliability was a dealbreaker, I think it's worth noting that there's an asterisk there and what that means.

But yes, I agree that availability is a key issue at the moment. It was so easy to get just a few years ago.