WaitingForTheBus

WaitingForTheBus

Student
Oct 27, 2018
136
After my experience with partial yesterday, I felt an excitement that I hadn't felt for a long time. It all seemed so easy and peaceful. I've felt rather desperate lately, my lows are for longer periods and at a depth I have never experienced before.

So I convinced myself to hasten my demise by saying good bye to a few people today. Just told them that I need to get away to clear my head but that I also need to move on so probably won't be back at my current job.

I came home with a plan that I am hoping I can execute. Yet, I can already feel that doubt creeping in to the back of my head. This is so final but the pain is so real, every fucking day. Hoping that a few hours of knocking back some scotch will make it that little bit easier.
 
  • Like
Reactions: letmeseethedeath, Singing In The Rain, Empty Smile and 27 others
TheLastTrip

TheLastTrip

Experienced
Nov 2, 2018
285
I hope your find your peace @WaitingForTheBus
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, piratemaverick, lv-gras and 7 others
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,813
Good luck and hope you succeed in finding permanent peace! As far as alcohol, I wouldn't recommend too much otherwise it could impair your ability to tie the noose.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, piratemaverick, lv-gras and 6 others
Empty RN

Empty RN

Student
Oct 25, 2018
107
Wishing you the best of luck as you move forward with your decision. I hope the result your looking for comes painlessly for you. Know you have a . whole community of people here for you in the aftermath if it doesn't go the way you're hoping ~
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Maravillosa, Made4TV and 4 others
Hiraeth

Hiraeth

Trying to be better. šŸ«¶šŸ»
Nov 3, 2018
63
i hope you find peace.
you were incredibly kind to me and i'll always appreciate that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, throwaway777, piratemaverick and 6 others
H

HopelessKim

Member
Nov 4, 2018
12
May you feel at peace in the hours leading up to ctb
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Maravillosa and 3 others
worldexploder

worldexploder

Visionary
Sep 19, 2018
2,821
Good luck buddy. I hope everything works out and that you find please. The NNM?
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Maravillosa and 3 others
WaitingForTheBus

WaitingForTheBus

Student
Oct 27, 2018
136
I hope your find your peace @WaitingForTheBus
Thank you.

Good luck and hope you succeed in finding permanent peace! As far as alcohol, I wouldn't recommend too much otherwise it could impair your ability to tie the noose.
Need a bit dutch courage. Slip knot already done, practice run yesterday which went surprisingly well.

Wishing you the best of luck as you move forward with your decision. I hope the result your looking for comes painlessly for you. Know you have a . whole community of people here for you in the aftermath if it doesn't go the way you're hoping ~
Thank you, we have a wonderful community here.

i hope you find peace.
you were incredibly kind to me and i'll always appreciate that.
I meant what I said too.x

May you feel at peace in the hours leading up to ctb
Thank you

Good luck buddy. I hope everything works out and that you find please. The NNM?
Thanks mate. Couldn't get that to work so doing partial.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, throwaway777, lv-gras and 10 others
worldexploder

worldexploder

Visionary
Sep 19, 2018
2,821
Thank you.


Need a bit dutch courage. Slip knot already done, practice run yesterday which went surprisingly well.


Thank you, we have a wonderful community here.


I meant what I said too.x


Thank you


Thanks mate. Couldn't get that to work so doing partial.
Sorry man. What didn't work about it?
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, Maravillosa, Vaa and 2 others
Deafsn0w

Deafsn0w

I will buy you a dog if you like my posts
Sep 4, 2018
2,488
Good luck!

Hope you find peace :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, throwaway777, Circles and 6 others
Weeping Garbage Can

Weeping Garbage Can

ąØ•ąØæąØ°ąØŖąØ¾ ąØ•ąØ°ąØ•ą©‡ ąØ®ą©ˆąØØą©‚ą©° ąØ­ą©ą©±ąØ² ąØœąØ¾ąØ“ ā¤ļø
Oct 31, 2018
320
I hope everything works out in your favor and you find peace :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, throwaway777, Circles and 6 others
WaitingForTheBus

WaitingForTheBus

Student
Oct 27, 2018
136
So attempt number 1 was a failure. Didn't get the same experience as yesterday, that took less than 5 seconds and i was out.

Today my head feels like it wants to pop and my throat is killing me. So sore after yesterday that the slightest pressure is a distraction. More scotch is needed. :)

Thanks for the kind words everyone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, throwaway777, worldexploder and 4 others
longingforrelease

longingforrelease

Specialist
Oct 27, 2018
381
blessings to you friend.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 1 other person
G

Goldie

Specialist
Sep 6, 2018
307
I hope you can do it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, throwaway777 and 2 others
cap

cap

Aporia
Oct 19, 2018
48
Good luck.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 1 other person
BaconCheeseburger

BaconCheeseburger

Comfort-eating
Aug 4, 2018
693
Hugs, I tried (very amateurish with no preparation or research) as a test run and I got the exploding head feeling too. Someone told me that's not supposed to happen.. Oops.
 
  • Like
Reactions: stargazer, VanHeineken, Goldie and 5 others
S

Schopenhauer

Enlightened
Oct 3, 2018
1,133
Good luck, man. You (and everyone else) deserve peace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, throwaway777 and 2 others
Help_Me

Help_Me

Gene pool mistake
Oct 21, 2018
516
Good luck, mate ! I hope you will find your eternal peace. You will be missed..
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 2 others
L

lv-gras

fledermausƟƟƟƟƟƟƟƟ
Jul 27, 2018
617
wishing you peace however

offers hugs
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, throwaway777 and 3 others
E

Ella Disenchanted

Student
Sep 3, 2018
120
I can already feel that doubt creeping in to the back of my head. This is so final but the pain is so real, every fucking day.

I understand only too well.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 3 others
piratemaverick

piratemaverick

Member
Nov 8, 2018
50
I hope your find your peace @WaitingForTheBus
After my experience with partial yesterday, I felt an excitement that I hadn't felt for a long time. It all seemed so easy and peaceful. I've felt rather desperate lately, my lows are for longer periods and at a depth I have never experienced before.

So I convinced myself to hasten my demise by saying good bye to a few people today. Just told them that I need to get away to clear my head but that I also need to move on so probably won't be back at my current job.

I came home with a plan that I am hoping I can execute. Yet, I can already feel that doubt creeping in to the back of my head. This is so final but the pain is so real, every fucking day. Hoping that a few hours of knocking back some scotch will make it that little bit easier.
good luck buddy i hope you reach peace
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 2 others
T

TiredHorse

Enlightened
Nov 1, 2018
1,819
Safe travels, WaitingForTheBus. I have enjoyed your posts, and I will miss you, but I hope you find the peace you need.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, Deafsn0w and 3 others
wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,802
good luck
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, LDoyle3008 and 2 others
Jen Erik

Jen Erik

-
Oct 12, 2018
637
I've appreciated your thoughtful, kind posts. Wishing you peace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VanHeineken, Vaa, LDoyle3008 and 4 others
G

Goldie

Specialist
Sep 6, 2018
307
Go for it!
I'm looking forward to reading your goodbye post soon.
Good luck to you
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and VanHeineken
V

VanHeineken

Experienced
Apr 10, 2018
270
May you be successful in all your endeavours and may you find peace, my friend.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
weedoge

weedoge

Banned
Jul 12, 2018
1,525
Hey @WaitingForTheBus there's absolutely no shame whatever you decide to do. We'll always welcome you here and always wish you the most peaceful farewell possible. Please post here more if you need anything.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Made4TV, RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and VanHeineken
Empty Smile

Empty Smile

The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
Jul 13, 2018
1,785
Good luck brother. Fly high.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and VanHeineken