SN: Last D.

[Purple777]

I'm on the 48 regimen and will take SN tonight. I will be keeping you guys informed about it's reliability. Yesterday, my second day on the regimen, I was feeling so alone and sad. I couldn't stop crying. I tried all the things I loved to do: reading, watching a movie, eating, doing a puzzle, etc. But I couldn't find myself to do it. I was depressed and was stuck crying on the floor. But today, I feel so light and happy. Peace is it ? Bt I feel really relaxed . Maybe I finally feel free. I'm reading my favorite book and by the time I finish, it should be time.

I just had some crackers for my last meal. Tonight at 11pm, I'll be taking the last meto with 20mg. And then 800mg Tagamet at 11:10. Some benzos at 11:20, mixing the SN at 11:35. Finally, SN at 11:40.

 

[Dreamcolleger]

Good luck mate, do you think it's the meto making you feel this way? I couldn't get past the 4th dose mostly because of it.

 

[Purple777]

Good luck mate, do you think it's the meto making you feel this way? I couldn't get past the 4th dose mostly because of it.

Thank you. I don't know if that's the reason why. I think it's because I had a day left before I ctb and I was just feeling emotional. Now that today is the day, I feel peace is near by. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be feeling but I've heard people say they get dizzy from it or bad side affects. I don't feel any of that besides having to use the restroom a lot.

 

[bluesky1972-2019]

I wish you the peace you are seeking. I hope I can be as brave when I am ready.
How much SN are you planning on taking?

 

[Purple777]

Thank you. I really appreciate all the support.

15mg in 100ml water. I weigh about 125lb so I think that should be enough .

 

[bluesky1972-2019]

Thank you. I really appreciate all the support.

15mg in 100ml water. I weigh about 125lb so I think that should be enough .

As long as you are ready and at peace with your decision. I guess it can feel exciting to leave this awful sick world and move on.
I am planning on at least 20g SN. I have Primperan and Tagamet but no benzos. I guess it's not a essential part.

 

[Purple777]

As long as you are ready and at peace with your decision. I guess it can feel exciting to leave this awful sick world and move on.
I am planning on at least 20g SN. I have Primperan and Tagamet but no benzos. I guess it's not a essential part.

You'll know when you know. I wish you good luck with that as well. Take your time though. When you're ready, you don't have to be brave. You just do it. Best luck xoxo

 

[bluesky1972-2019]

You'll know when you know. I wish you good luck with that as well. Take your time though. When you're ready, you don't have to be brave. You just do it. Best luck xoxo

I hope SN does work. I do get the doubts. But I used to chat to a guy on here via PM who eventually started the 48hr regime. Not heard from him in a couple of months now. So I assume he ctb. Bought his SN from the same supplier as me. I hope he's a peace.

 

[Meretlein]

I'm sorry it has come to this for you but I hope you find the peace you're looking for.

 

[Purple777]

Me too. I'm just hoping that as long as I follow the the regimen correctly, it will work out. Because I really feel like I'm ready. Thank you guys !

 

[bluesky1972-2019]

Me too. I'm just hoping that as long as I follow the the regimen correctly, it will work out. Because I really feel like I'm ready. Thank you guys !

You will be missed x

 

[malummo]

I wish you a peaceful process.

 

[Ramirez]

Gl. hope it works out for you.

 

[LifeOver]

I wish you the best. Probably going to ctb with the same method myself soon.

 

[DoneWithThis]

I wish their was something that I could say to make you feel better. I wish their was something I could say to make everyone on here feel better. More than anything else, I wish their was something I could say to myself to feel better.

Would I like to? Of course.. But I can't. I wish I could.

I don't know what brought you to this. But I'm sure I wasn't just come compulsive action just because you had a bad day.

It's your life your choice, and I wish life wouldn't of had to make you feel that it would be better not to exist.

And whether it's an afterlife or mere Nothingness. I do wish you the peace you deserve. That finally the struggle can end, that you don't have to pick up your sword and fight anymore.

I don't know you. I wish I would of. I hope you get to go out in the least painful way possible. With the least amount of suffering. Whatever your cause for suffering here. I hope itt gets to go away as soon as possible. Big hugs.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

i think it's too late now. now you're resting in peace safe travels my friend. you'll be missed. don't be sad anymore you're going to exit this unfair life. this is my method too. i only need some bravery

 

[Purple777]

Two more hours until I ctb. Not yet but soon. You guys make me feel so emotional. I've never had this much support before . I'm so thankful.

I will update you guys at 11pm

 

[letmeseethedeath]

hey please be safe, ok? it hurts to lose a beautiful human being like you but i'm also happy for you. you're finally winning this battle. so many many many warm hugs to you

 

[EmptySteph62]

I hope that no matter where this choice leads you, it's to a better place where there is no more suffering <3

 

[Taki]

And there's no shame in changing your mind either. We have all been to the brink. Whatever happens I hope for a peaceful night for you.
This is a tragedy. That it should have come to this for you, and that you are alone tonight. I'm sorry.

 

[Purple777]

Just taken my last dose of meto. 10 minutes until I take 800mg Tagamet. I feel okay so far. The only thing the meto has affected for me is going to to bathroom. My heart has been beating fast for the last hour

 

[DoneWithThis]

I hope you get to pass out as quickly as possible and feel the least pain possible. Imagine what you've already suffered to come to this point. I hope you find 5hr peace you need and deserve.

 

[Purple777]

Thank you so much. I checked into an apartment for a week. I have to check out Friday morning so I hope now til then will be a long enough window. I hope this will be the end for me
Just taken the Tagamet. 10-15 minutes until I take 20 Xanax. And then SN at 11:40

 

[DoneWithThis]

We might talk theoretically about a time frame. About the intensity of pain. We can look through medical journals. We can read through all the threads about our specific method. But no one is going to really know until they go through it.

I mean, look where we are. I'm sure our first idea for finding relief wasn't joining a pro choice suicide forum. I doubt that CTBing is generally the first choice, or the ideal choice.

Whatever comes or doesn't come after this. I just hope you feel better. I hope that I feel better mi hope that we all feel better.

 

[Suicidal4Ever]

Goodluck

 

[Purple777]

Going to take 2 Xanax bars for now, I don't want to pass out before the SN. I'll take the rest right after. My head feels a little dizzy right now
Just mixed my SN. 10 more minutes

 

[wendydong1]

hope it's painless for you

 

[letmeseethedeath]

good luck again. just remember i'm here if you need something in your last journey bear hugs to you

 

[Suicidal4Ever]

The drinking the SN mix is horrible

 

[Meretlein]

Going to take 2 Xanax bars for now, I don't want to pass out before the SN. I'll take the rest right after. My head feels a little dizzy right now
Just mixed my SN. 10 more minutes

I hope it goes peacefully.