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should i tell my best friend that i’m going to cbt
Thread starterangelana
Start date
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should i tell my best friend because i know they're going to stop me and not want me to do it and i feel like they'll feel worse because of me and i'd rather not make them anymore sad but i don't know they deserve a goodbye but is it a good idea?
No. Unless you want them to stop you, you shouldn't let them know. If you are unsure, though, please do reach out to them, but instead of telling them that you're "going to kill yourself", just tell them you've been having scary thoughts or you just feel really depressed, upset, unsafe, whatever youre feeling. If they're a real friend they'll listen.
Reactions:
APeacefulPlace, Duality, Cloud Busting and 2 others
I don't think it's a good idea to tell your best friend unless you know for a fact that they're going to be ok with the choice you're making. People, especially those that have no intentions of ctb, never know how to handle these conversations. It's extremely uncomfortable for them. Your friend will either
A) tell someone immediately who will contact the authorities and have you involuntarily seek treatment (most likely inpatient).
B) not leave your side and contact you a trillion times to make sure you're ok.
C) not know how to handle the news, and ignore you for good.
I also think it's better to keep it to yourself because imagine the guilt that they'll be left with. I would instead, try to do something fun with them before you ctb, create a good memory for them and leave a personal note for your bestie.
Reactions:
hi-okbye, Cloud Busting and complexpalm
I think it's a terrible idea unless one actually wants their plans to be interferred in, it just sounds risky doing such a thing even if there's a chance of the person respecting the decision which you say they won't. I'd personally just write notes to say farewell instead.
Definitely not, unless you really want to lay a heavy guilt trip on them, no matter what they do.
If they try to get help for you, or stop you, they will experience the guilt of betrayal at some point.
If they do nothing and you do ctb they will experience the guilt of feeling that they allowed you to die when they could have tried to save you.
You can send a delayed email if you feel like you can't keep it in, that way if you change your mind in a few hours, or the next day, you can delete it. But absolutely do not tell them right away for your own safety.
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