Help Should I send a Goodbye Message to Friends?

[niceoofie]

If I were finally brave enough to CTB someday, such as overdosing or shooting myself in the head…before I do that, should I send a goodbye message to friends on Discord?


It would be something like:
"Dear [name],
I'm so grateful we became long-term friends since middle school. I had such fun times with you in our history and science class. I appreciate you introducing me to your friends. They all have been wonderful people to me. You're a fun person to hang out with. You have a good sense of humor and are so caring towards others. Your unwavering support, especially during tough times (like COVID), has meant a lot to me. Thank you for being there whenever I needed to talk about my depression.

I'm grateful we got to be in two classes together throughout high school. I wish we had more classes together, but it's okay. We still got to talk during lunch and Discord. That makes me grateful that those times have still made us close. I'm proud of you for improving your grades. Keep up the excellent work. I wish you well in your music career. You are such a hardworking person. You can be better than me.

I'm sorry. Goodbye. I'll see you in the afterlife.
With love, [my name]. :)"


I would send these texts when my friends are the most busy or sleeping so they would not be able to text back immediately, trying to convince me not to CTB. I just wanted to send them this as closure and remind them of my good times with them. Suppose I send my goodbye texts during those specific times. Even if they replied, it would probably be too late since I would either be overdosing to death or already shot myself in the head.

 

[Lost_my_soul]

Maybe schedule an email or message at a specific time once you decide to do it, if you change your mind, you can delete it.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I wouldn 't send msgs directly. In the worst case they could interfere ur plans. What u wanna do is up 2 u in the end.

 

[peachchildtenshi]

I think sending message at the last second would be alot better,

 

[abcz]

I would personally feel better sending a delayed message, and also if you don't end up ctbing, you can always cancel the message which is good. I also think that someone may feel more guilt if you say that and then they feel that they might have been able to stop you if they were awake as that is how many people feel.

Also people can be awake or asleep at weird times sometimes so that could also put a wrench in the plans of you telling them while not wanting them to say anything back.

Although it can be really awkward if you forget to delete them if you don't ctb as I couldn't figure out how to unschedule the scheduled emails one time so instead I removed the link sharing access to the google doc with the notes(this was a few years ago) and then I went to mental health treatment and then when I came out someone asked me about it and I felt slightly weird. Although I had only made two that time. Like a month before then I made paper notes for my family and stuff but I didn't fully feel that I was trying to ctb so then I felt those notes were betraying me so that is also why if I ever ctb I likely won't write an actual note except maybe a delayed email or something.

 

[Is0lated]

If I were finally brave enough to CTB someday, such as overdosing or shooting myself in the head…before I do that, should I send a goodbye message to friends on Discord?


It would be something like:
"Dear [name],
I'm so grateful we became long-term friends since middle school. I had such fun times with you in our history and science class. I appreciate you introducing me to your friends. They all have been wonderful people to me. You're a fun person to hang out with. You have a good sense of humor and are so caring towards others. Your unwavering support, especially during tough times (like COVID), has meant a lot to me. Thank you for being there whenever I needed to talk about my depression.

I'm grateful we got to be in two classes together throughout high school. I wish we had more classes together, but it's okay. We still got to talk during lunch and Discord. That makes me grateful that those times have still made us close. I'm proud of you for improving your grades. Keep up the excellent work. I wish you well in your music career. You are such a hardworking person. You can be better than me.

I'm sorry. Goodbye. I'll see you in the afterlife.
With love, [my name]. :)"


I would send these texts when my friends are the most busy or sleeping so they would not be able to text back immediately, trying to convince me not to CTB. I just wanted to send them this as closure and remind them of my good times with them. Suppose I send my goodbye texts during those specific times. Even if they replied, it would probably be too late since I would either be overdosing to death or already shot myself in the head.

Ion recommend doing that cz if you fail it's gonna be hella embarrassing

 

[nightlygem]

I would write a handwritten letter rather than a message. Then, mail it out to them or have someone find them and hand them out after your CTB. As mentioned by a few people here, and from previous experience, it leaves a bad taste in people's mouth when someone sends a goodbye message but ends up failing.

 

[niceoofie]

Thank you guys for the advice. Much appreciated. I will either send a delayed email or handwritten letter to them.

 

[AresCohere]

I recommend you do but put it somewhere they will look when you first go "missing" be it a physical or digital location. Make it give them the closure they may want.

On the other hand however, writing a note can be a major trigger for SI, at least from my experience it was, and writing it often forced my brain to stop what it wants to do. Maybe I'm just weird tho.

 

[Unknown21]

It's up to u, but if u wanted to do it then send delayed massages.