Should I get revenge before I go?

[Saddaisy]

Should I get revenge on the $!u@ my partner cheated on me with before I go?
I have a recording of her admitting to stealing from her job, she does drugs around her daughter and leaves her with her neighbor who sells crack when she goes out hoeing it up. (Random guys not my soon to be ex).
So I could get her fired, evicted, arrested, have her loss her kid, and have her loss her welfare/

That alone is almost (but not) enough to make me want to stick around and watch her suffer. I think I'm going to at least email the recording of her bragging about how she steals money to her boss tomorrow. The others would take longer than I have.
Anyone have any quick revenge ideas? (Less than 12 days) id appreciate it. I want her to wish for death like I do, but she's stuck in jail so she can't do it. With her record she'd get at least 10 years.

 

[AcornUnderground]

Jesus. I can't believe that your instinct is revenge and not the welfare of a child.

 

[Saddaisy]

Jesus. I can't believe that your instinct is revenge and not the welfare of a child.

A child doesn't excuse her sleeping my man. She leaves the kid with a crack dealer and does drugs in front of the kid. The kid would be better off with the day. He lives in California so he doesn't know what a piece of trash she is. As far as he knows she's in school and going to be a nurse.
None of that is true. She works a minimum wage job and gets by selling drugs and probably selling sex too

sorry but a kid is not an excuse to be a whore

 

[Mr2005]

Your partners responsible for this. She doesn't owe you anything

 

[Saddaisy]

Your partners responsible for this. She doesn't owe you anything

And I don't owe her anything. She decided to steal money, sell drugs, leave her kid with a crack dealer.... so she'll get what she deserves and so will my partner.

I'm thinking a 10 plus prison sentence is good for her. She's on probation and if she misses up she gets 7 years plus extra for stealing in her words "5000" at least in the last year. Plus she sells drugs.she she'll be there awhile. And her kid will get to grow up with her dad who is a decent person:

 

[AnxietyAttack44]

Jesus. I can't believe that your instinct is revenge and not the welfare of a child.

I agree, this would not really be a revenge, more of a social service

 

[Saddaisy]

I agree, this would not really be a revenge, more of a social service

I think sending her to prison and letting her kid go live in California with her dad would be good for her. If she stays with her mom she's going to grow up a drug addicted s'ct. so it's really for the best:

 

[autumnal]

A child doesn't excuse her sleeping my man. She leaves the kid with a crack dealer and does drugs in front of the kid. The kid would be better off with the day. He lives in California so he doesn't know what a piece of trash she is. As far as he knows she's in school and going to be a nurse.
None of that is true. She works a minimum wage job and gets by selling drugs and probably selling sex too

sorry but a kid is not an excuse to be a whore

I think the poster meant that the welfare of the child should be your main motivation for reporting her, rather than your desire for revenge.

More generally, I'm sorry but your whole attitude to all this strikes me as immature, petty and very undignified. It's sadly consistent with your previous attitude towards euthanizing your cat (and I thank god that was fixed). I really do feel like you are letting the infidelity consume you too greatly, and although you have said before that you also have other unrelated reasons for suicide, I still believe that getting some therapy over this (and/or confronting your partner without suiciding) might help make your life livable again, rather than throwing it away over the actions of one person.

 

[Saddaisy]

I think the poster meant that the welfare of the child should be your main motivation for reporting her, rather than your desire for revenge.

More generally, I'm sorry but your whole attitude to all this strikes me as immature, petty and very undignified. It's sadly consistent with your previous attitude towards euthanizing your cat (and I thank god that was fixed). I really do feel like you are letting the infidelity consume you too greatly, and although you have said before that you also have other unrelated reasons for suicide, I still believe that getting some therapy over this (and/or confronting your partner without suiciding) might help make your life livable again, rather than throwing it away over the actions of one person.

Nope... the kids secondary. She'll pay because she's a h0@ bag. My life will NEVER be live able alone bc of a chronic illness I have so I'm going to make the people who caused this pay

 

[AcornUnderground]

Nope... the kids secondary. She'll pay because she's a h0@ bag. My life will NEVER be live able alone bc of a chronic illness I have so I'm going to make the people who caused this pay

...speechless.

 

[Mr2005]

And I don't owe her anything. She decided to steal money, sell drugs, leave her kid with a crack dealer.... so she'll get what she deserves and so will my partner.

I'm thinking a 10 plus prison sentence is good for her. She's on probation and if she misses up she gets 7 years plus extra for stealing in her words "5000" at least in the last year. Plus she sells drugs.she she'll be there awhile. And her kid will get to grow up with her dad who is a decent person:

Does any of that actually make a difference to you though? I mean do you know her personally?

 

[Saddaisy]

Does any of that actually make a difference to you though? I mean do you know her personally?

Yep and seeing her suffer will make me happy

 

[Mr2005]

Yep and seeing her suffer will make me happy

Not happy enough to live so what's the point?

 

[Living sucks]

I'm going to steal this from @GoodPersonEffed ... stop giving this attention ...the right thing to do is deal with the BF. I'm starting to feel trolled with all these posts..
And this one from @autumnal

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

When it comes to kids, there's a lot to consider. Attachment to a mother is the most important thing in a child's life. Even if it's a bad attachment, there may still be some good there of which you're not aware, and that bit of good can be better than no attachment at all. If the child is taken away, there's a possibility that it will end up in an even worse situation, such as with other predatory family members, or a predatory foster family. Therefore I caution playing God in such a situation, as the child could be given better opportunities, but could also be destroyed. It doesn't seem that your focus is on what's good for the child, but on the destruction of its mother, and the child has only become a focus in order to validate an act of revenge so that you can feel just in doing so. I caution that you are making the child a pawn in the strategy of your game. How are you any better than the mother? Because it seems that you are acting in self-righteous indignation and want to see yourself as better than her, since your partner's cheating with her made her seem better than you to your partner. Your beef is with him, and maybe with yourself, if you're prone to blaming yourself for your mistakes but can't deal with that, so blame must be directed elsewhere to discharge your pain and discomfort, followed by condemnation, judgment, and punishment.

Whatever power you lost by your partner cheating with her, you're not going to become more powerful by being the vengeful God in her life. If she was indeed destructive to you, and you respond by being destructive to her, I wonder: Are you then better than her? Are you then as bad as her? Are you then even worse than her because you are intentionally targeting her, while you were not the primary focus of her unwise action in hooking up with your partner? He chose to step out, and she was available and willing; if not her, it would have been someone else.

The only thing you can potentially control and which therefore gives you power is your own life. You can ditch the partner you hate. You can move forward without him and good riddance, you are free from life with him in it and all the shit that goes along with his presence, and you gain more power over yourself and your well-being. You can choose to end your life, with dignity and self-respect, because that's 100 percent about you, done only to you, and focused on you, and you become free from life all the shit that goes along with it if there is no value in life and nothing in your power to strive for.

Focusing on everyone else gives them power over you and directs your actions; focusing on yourself is self-empowering and also directs your actions. In my experience, the latter is far more rewarding.

You can keep hating everyone else, or you can start working toward respecting yourself and treating yourself as you want to be treated, since you are the one you have to live with whether you want to or not. You are also the only one you will die with; you won't be dragging anyone else along with you, much as you might like to. So where do you want to direct your awesome power? And how do you want to wield it? Toward the ultimate destruction of others and yourself, or toward becoming your own foundation and building from it?

 

[autumnal]

Nope... the kids secondary. She'll pay because she's a h0@ bag. My life will NEVER be live able alone bc of a chronic illness I have so I'm going to make the people who caused this pay

No offence, but did you also have this same sunny disposition before your boyfriend cheated on you?

...speechless.

You should have seen the cat post At least the boyfriend and female cheater were responsible for their actions.

 

[ohhgeeitsme]

Honestly, it sounds like she has some problems and needs help, not prison, which could potentially make it more difficult for her to get better. If what you say is true, the child would be better off with her dad, but it would still be better if she got the real kind of help it sounds like she needs.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

My life will NEVER be live able alone bc of a chronic illness I have so I'm going to make the people who caused this pay

They caused your chronic illness?? Shit, can you get them to upgrade it to terminal, and can y'all work together and sell that to others who want their ctb to appear natural?

Think about it! Then you'd be using your power for good instead of evil. You'd be a self-deliverance hero, damn near a deity! Which, y'know, seems to be kind of a goal, being god-like here.

 

[Pryras]

I never understood why someone would go after the other woman or man and not their significant other. She isn't the problem here your partner is.

 

[GoBack]

If you go after her in this way and involve legal stuff the kid is goin to be affected somehow. There's no guarantee she'll get to live with her dad she could end up in care.

The situation you're in is toxic I really feel for you. It's poison to bottle this up and look where it's goin now.

 

[autumnal]

I never understood why someone would go after the other woman or man and not their significant other. She isn't the problem here your partner is.

This. Exactly this.

 

[SpottedPanda]

How's about no?

 

[Whatsthepointanyway]

Should I get revenge on the $!u@ my partner cheated on me with before I go?
I have a recording of her admitting to stealing from her job, she does drugs around her daughter and leaves her with her neighbor who sells crack when she goes out hoeing it up. (Random guys not my soon to be ex).
So I could get her fired, evicted, arrested, have her loss her kid, and have her loss her welfare/

That alone is almost (but not) enough to make me want to stick around and watch her suffer. I think I'm going to at least email the recording of her bragging about how she steals money to her boss tomorrow. The others would take longer than I have.
Anyone have any quick revenge ideas? (Less than 12 days) id appreciate it. I want her to wish for death like I do, but she's stuck in jail so she can't do it. With her record she'd get at least 10 years.

This may have a lot of consequences on an innocent child who had nothing to do with it. Anger is a powerful emotion. Calm down and think through before taking any actions

 

[Saddaisy]

When it comes to kids, there's a lot to consider. Attachment to a mother is the most important thing in a child's life. Even if it's a bad attachment, there may still be some good there of which you're not aware, and that bit of good can be better than no attachment at all. If the child is taken away, there's a possibility that it will end up in an even worse situation, such as with other predatory family members, or a predatory foster family. Therefore I caution playing God in such a situation, as the child could be given better opportunities, but could also be destroyed. It doesn't seem that your focus is on what's good for the child, but on the destruction of its mother, and the child has only become a focus in order to validate an act of revenge so that you can feel just in doing so. I caution that you are making the child a pawn in the strategy of your game. How are you any better than the mother? Because it seems that you are acting in self-righteous indignation and want to see yourself as better than her, since your partner's cheating with her made her seem better than you to your partner. Your beef is with him, and maybe with yourself, if you're prone to blaming yourself for your mistakes but can't deal with that, so blame must be directed elsewhere to discharge your pain and discomfort, followed by condemnation, judgment, and punishment.

Whatever power you lost by your partner cheating with her, you're not going to become more powerful by being the vengeful God in her life. If she was indeed destructive to you, and you respond by being destructive to her, I wonder: Are you then better than her? Are you then as bad as her? Are you then even worse than her because you are intentionally targeting her, while you were not the primary focus of her unwise action in hooking up with your partner? He chose to step out, and she was available and willing; if not her, it would have been someone else.

The only thing you can potentially control and which therefore gives you power is your own life. You can ditch the partner you hate. You can move forward without him and good riddance, you are free from life with him in it and all the shit that goes along with his presence, and you gain more power over yourself and your well-being. You can choose to end your life, with dignity and self-respect, because that's 100 percent about you, done only to you, and focused on you, and you become free from life all the shit that goes along with it if there is no value in life and nothing in your power to strive for.

Focusing on everyone else gives them power over you and directs your actions; focusing on yourself is self-empowering and also directs your actions. In my experience, the latter is far more rewarding.

You can keep hating everyone else, or you can start working toward respecting yourself and treating yourself as you want to be treated, since you are the one you have to live with whether you want to or not. You are also the only one you will die with; you won't be dragging anyone else along with you, much as you might like to. So where do you want to direct your awesome power? And how do you want to wield it? Toward the ultimate destruction of others and yourself, or toward becoming your own foundation and building from it?

Hurting her i smy goal. Her little heathen is collateral damage and I am OK with that. Having a kid does not give a woman that right to be a home wrecking hoe bag. And if it is taken away it will go to the dad who is a decent human and actually works for a living and doesn't hoe around and live off welfare.

Honestly, it sounds like she has some problems and needs help, not prison, which could potentially make it more difficult for her to get better. If what you say is true, the child would be better off with her dad, but it would still be better if she got the real kind of help it sounds like she needs.

Not my problem to get her help. She can find that in prision. She has already been fired and they are thinking about pressing charges. If they don't I am sure the fact that she sells drugs will be more than enough for a nice prison sentence for her.

If you go after her in this way and involve legal stuff the kid is goin to be affected somehow. There's no guarantee she'll get to live with her dad she could end up in care.

The situation you're in is toxic I really feel for you. It's poison to bottle this up and look where it's goin now.

The dad tried to get full custody when they broke up. He was a mess back then so he lost. He got clean and is a great person now.

This may have a lot of consequences on an innocent child who had nothing to do with it. Anger is a powerful emotion. Calm down and think through before taking any actions

I thought about this for the entire 6 months I knew he cheated before I decided this was what I wanted to do. I even gave him a chance to admit he cheated and he didn't. So they will both pay.

They caused your chronic illness?? Shit, can you get them to upgrade it to terminal, and can y'all work together and sell that to others who want their ctb to appear natural?

Think about it! Then you'd be using your power for good instead of evil. You'd be a self-deliverance hero, damn near a deity! Which, y'know, seems to be kind of a goal, being god-like here.

I meant I will always be alone bc of my chronic illness and little hoe bag ruined my relationship. So I will ruin her life. Already got her fired. SO now I have 1 and a half weeks to get her arrested.

I never understood why someone would go after the other woman or man and not their significant other. She isn't the problem here your partner is.

Nope that ghetto trash h0e bag IS the problem. She knew he was in a relationship and she will spend a good prtion of her life in prison now. I was wrong and it is 10 years if her probation gets revoked. If I can get her arrested for stealing and selling drugs that will be her 3 strikes.

 

[Soul]

Sigh. Do you know how to reach the child's father? At least you could phone him and warn him that his child is soon to be in a foster home if he doesn't intervene.

It must feel horrible to be so full of venom. I'm sorry for you.

 

[AcornUnderground]

I don't know how much I believe in heaven, hell, karma or whatever. Certainly in this life what comes around didn't go around in my case - but I'd do some real soul searching before you go and kill yourself. You don't want to die with all that moral weight, just in case.

 

[Saddaisy]

Sigh. Do you know how to reach the child's father? At least you could phone him and warn him that his child is soon to be in a foster home if he doesn't intervene.

It must feel horrible to be so full of venom. I'm sorry for you.

I know who he is and can see his facebook. I have never spoken to him. And knowing she was fired today was actually a great feeling. First time I have smiled in 6 months. Not my fault that ^$% thought she could steal money and have no punishment. I bet you guys all think her stealing was ok bc she has a kid.

I don't know how much I believe in heaven, hell, karma or whatever. Certainly in this life what comes around didn't go around in my case - but I'd do some real soul searching before you go and kill yourself. You don't want to die with all that moral weight, just in case.

I don't believe in heaven or hell so i am not worried about that.

 

[Soul]

@Saddaisy, please post something on the man's facebook page to let him know his daughter needs his attention. Please.

 

[AcornUnderground]

@Saddaisy, please post something on the man's facebook page to let him know his daughter needs his attention. Please.

Very good advice.

 

[Saddaisy]

@Saddaisy, please post something on the man's facebook page to let him know his daughter needs his attention. Please.

I will make a fake Facebook account and do it that way. I am not going to let this ghetto h0e know I had anything to do with it until after I am gone. I plan to write her a letter ( to be deviled to her in jail) after I am no longer living. BUT admitting on a tape you have stolen 1000s of dollars and being seen on video stealing every day is pretty hard evidence. Not to mention the 5 pounds of pot she has in her apartment.

I will post something when I know for sure she is getting arrested. As of right now she has just been fired and they will decide by Thursday if they are pressing charges.