Discussion Shall I resign from my job before my CTB?

[Deleted-User-0]

I have been working in my team for 4 years now and they are nice and supportive people. I'm not sure to resign before my CTB or take some time off to do it.
The thing is if I do resign I have to go through a stressful and intense hand over and transition and it would become another burden on my shoulder and also answering people's questions what are you doing to do which will lead to many lies etc.
Also on the selfish side if for any reason it doesn't happen I have something to go back to (let's say 1% chance).
On the other hand if I don't resign before my CTB people might think my team members put me under pressure and stresses me out and as a result I did what I did which is unfair on them.
I'm considering CTB just due to personal long term mental health problems including rapid cycle bipolar disorder.
Any thoughts and suggestions are very much appreciated.

 

[mattwitt]

If you have a life insurance policy from work that covers suicide you might want to consider that before you quit.

 

[randomz]

If I were you I would not resign. BUt are you absolutely sure nothing else can help you feel better and enjoy life more? that's a serious decision and you need 110% certainty at least to take it. We are always here if you want to talk.

 

[ghostspace]

I think despite either choice, everyone will blame themselves a little bit. That's very human and normal with any sort of death.

I wouldn't resign if I were you. If for some reason, you want to postpone CTB, get cold feet, or change your mind, it might be difficult to get your job back.

If you're worried about your team members feeling responsible, take sick leave or vacation time, tell them there's a personal life emergency and you need a week off. Then they'll know there were other things going on in your life than whatever goes on at work.

Take care, either way. Be careful and treat yourself kindly in the meantime.

 

[TAW122]

This is a good question and when I was working before, I had that in the back of my mind. My take on this is not to resign because if you resign, then it would grab someone's attention and they "may" start to probe into your life (which is counterproductive towards your plan of CTB'ing). Instead, I might recommend just keeping things quiet IRL and not raising any red flags or things that could set off intervention and then just go about as if everything is normal. When the time comes, you may let some people who you trust know (it's optional), but otherwise just to keep quiet and follow through whatever decision you decide to make.

I also agree with @randomz here when it comes to being 110% certain with the decision, you don't want to go through it unsure which could result in a failed attempt as well as other consequences that follow (permanent injury, being locked up against your will, social ostracization, and financial problems).

 

[Notabadguy]

Please, don't resing. You never know. It's not necessary. What for? Don't resign.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Well...if I were you, I would write a detailed letter explaining your decision and making it clear that anyone involved with you on a professional level are not to blame in any way whatsoever. You obviously care about how they feel so make it clear that you appreciated them on a professional, and, to a degree, personal level. Make sure that said letter is clearly marked to be delivered to an individual you can trust to deliver said message to other co-workers. Either place this letter in the location where you CTB or have it delivered in a time delayed manner. This would likely work better as it can be controlled better and guaranteed delivery to the intended recipient or not delivered at all in the case the event fails or Doesn't transpire at all.

 

[squirtsoda]

I would not resign. Firstly it would create suspicion, secondly it would be potentially bad for you if you resigned and didn't go through with CTB.

 

[bananabear]

Dont resign. Id suggest something like an email set to send after youve CTB, if that is the decision you ultimately decide on. Sorry for what you've gone through.

My workplace, although only a part time job, has a written rule about if you no contact no show for two days in a row they will assume youve abandoned the job. HOWEVER one day i was hospitalized (for the obvious) and as there were no phones in the ward they couldn't reach me, so they called my emergency contacts, which was an unpleasant time as no one in my personal life should have known about it. I made sure to remove any emergency contacts, only have my own numbers there now. So perhaps make sure to not work on the day of...

Planning is important, and having a clear mind

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

My thoughts:

Do not quit in case you survive.

People will think about your ctb whatever they will think. You do not own responsibility for what others think or believe, in any situation, ever. You cannot control what others think or believe, ever.