DrinkingInHell
As long as there is death, there is hope
- Dec 26, 2024
- 24
I hadn't cut myself in a long time. I usually just take pills and try to sleep when I'm feeling my worst, but tonight I grabbed one of my shaving razors and cut myself. It felt so amazing, mentally that is. My arm still burns and stings terribly, but I love it for the fact that I am feeling at least *something*. When I can't find happiness, pain is the next best thing. Both a punishment to myself and the things I despise about me, and a release of my turmoil onto my skin, allowing me to feel something other than the deep boredom and un-satisfaction I almost constantly feel in regards to living.
And with the shaving razor I have, it is slightly seratted. It snags on my skin, making the cuts hurt a lot more than the pocket knives I used to cut with as a teen.
The only thing I regret is the fact that I have work tomorrow and hadn't thought about how hot it may be out, but even then the sliver comfort self harm brought me tonight is worth it.
And with the shaving razor I have, it is slightly seratted. It snags on my skin, making the cuts hurt a lot more than the pocket knives I used to cut with as a teen.
The only thing I regret is the fact that I have work tomorrow and hadn't thought about how hot it may be out, but even then the sliver comfort self harm brought me tonight is worth it.
