Venting Scared about getting drunk and impulsively taking SN

[bpdme]

Since receiving my SN, I just wanna get it over with. I planned for Monday or Wednesday but I'm getting drunk tonight and I just can't stop thinking about taking SN. If I throw up I'll just take more. But I know it isn't sensible but I think it'll be easier if I'm drunk.

 

[Wreck-it-Riley]

I think the alcohol will neutralize the SN? Apparently mixing it with pop or juice can make it not work. I would be cautious.

 

[MeltingHeart]

Sounds risky & impulsive- I get that u feel like the impulsivity factor might "help" u to go through with it...but yeah with too much booze...prob a recipe for failure...totally get where your coming from though.

 

[Stan]

Can't stop you. Nobody with any certainty can say whether you will succeed or fail.

 

[metalchic_74]

Drinking alcohol will definitely cause vomiting imo

 

[BPD_LE]

I understand the need for impulsiveness to help you take the plunge. But alcohol will increase it x 10 and SN is not the ideal method to mix it with. Your choice though, wish you the best ❤

 

[Kowahi2310]

All the best.

 

[bigj75]

glad you are back.

 

[charlie_z]

I get that u feel like the impulsivity factor might "help" u to go through with it.

I share this feeling, that I will need some type of powerful desensitizing agent to help me push through the doubts that continue to plague me. It makes me f-ing furious. And I also feel shame. I've struggled so long with this disease, that to now have to struggle with the vestiges of a religious upbringing I came to hate. Just feeling absolutely exhausted.