H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
I'm probably going to die in a month or so and I feel sad. I know it sounds weird but I want my parents there when I die. I wan't my mother to be there when I'm fading away from the mortal plane, talking to me and stroking my hair. It would be great to not have to die alone. I would love to tell them in hopes that they could be there to celebrate my exit from life with me. They won't though, they'll call the police and I'll get locked up. So that's all, it saddens me that people who celebrated the beginning of my life won't be celebrating my end with me. I know this may be weird, but they're my thoughts. I think I might get an air matress and lay out underneath the stars as I drink SN, Amy winehouse playing softly in the background. There are worse ways to go alone I suppose. Thanks for listening, Willow.
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
Hi I don't know about how close you are with your family, do they know how you feel at all and what you are going through? x
 
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Redt2go

Redt2go

flower child
Jan 5, 2019
1,643
I'm probably going to die in a month or so and I feel sad. I know it sounds weird but I want my parents there when I die. I wan't my mother to be there when I'm fading away from the mortal plane, talking to me and stroking my hair. It would be great to not have to die alone. I would love to tell them in hopes that they could be there to celebrate my exit from life with me. They won't though, they'll call the police and I'll get locked up. So that's all, it saddens me that people who celebrated the beginning of my life won't be celebrating my end with me. I know this may be weird, but they're my thoughts. I think I might get an air matress and lay out underneath the stars as I drink SN, Amy winehouse playing softly in the background. There are worse ways to go alone I suppose. Thanks for listening, Willow.
What's your favorite Amy song ?
 
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Sinbad

Sinbad

Self-Annihilation is loading...95%
Nov 27, 2018
542
Mine is Back to Black.
 
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Macc Lad

Macc Lad

Specialist
Jan 22, 2019
300
please be sure willow.......be sure this is what u want.......your parents will be heartbroken. if you do , i wish you well.....i wish you peace x
 
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EmotionlessWanderer

EmotionlessWanderer

Specialist
Jan 19, 2019
352
Just keep in mind that most of us have parents we will leave behind once we CTB. Wether they will pain over our death long term or not is really out of our control. All you can do is make peace with your decision.
 
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DontFearTheReaper

DontFearTheReaper

Slowly losing my mind and very ill, help me..
Nov 5, 2018
44
I don't think it is weird at all.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
Hi I don't know about how close you are with your family, do they know how you feel at all and what you are going through? x
They know I struggle with depression, but I haven't been hospitalized for like a year. I just hate to say goodbye through a note. I'd rather have them with me when I go. If I say anything they will stop me. America needs to legalize euthenasia so my parents could be there with me when I go.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
They know I struggle with depression, but I haven't been hospitalized for like a year. I just hate to say goodbye through a note. I'd rather have them with me when I go. If I say anything they will stop me. America needs to legalize euthenasia so my parents could be there with me when I go.

:-( that's so sad, I'm so sorry because you want them with you and don't want to be without them xx do you live with them?
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals, therhydler, Dead Meat and 2 others
H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
please be sure willow.......be sure this is what u want.......your parents will be heartbroken. if you do , i wish you well.....i wish you peace x
Thanks Macc! everyone one here is such good people. It's not fair that good people have to suffer.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
:-( that's so sad, I'm so sorry because you want them with you and don't want to be without them xx do you live with them?
Yes, I live with them. All i can do is spend as much time with them as I can until it is my time to go.
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
Yes, I live with them. All i can do is spend as much time with them as I can until it is my time to go.

I'm so sorry sweetie and I hope you can get as much love and pleasure out of this time together as you can and enjoy one another's company
 
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TheGoodGuy

TheGoodGuy

Visionary
Aug 27, 2018
2,999
It´s not weird at all that is how I wish I could go as well, I love my parents so insanely much they gave me the best childhood ever and have always been amazing parents with unlimited love for me I just wish I could end my existence peacefully like euthanasia patient can laying in a bed surrounded by family who understands them and slowly drifting off to sleep while my parents and siblings will be the last I see that would be wonderful. But we live in an unjust world and we are forced to die undignified all alone and sometimes in violent ways it´s so sad.

And I love the setting you are going to do I have such love for the night sky with the cool air, quiet world and the beautiful nostalgic peaceful star clear sky.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
I'm am grateful for you all, I really am. For the first time in a long time, I don't feel crazy or alone. I don't feel judged or misunderstood. If there is a God, I hope he blesses all of you immensely. I love you all and don't even know you. I think tortured souls are the most tender and loving souls, It's irony really. We are so hard on our selves and gentle towards everyone else.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
My brain is just really fucked up! I'm going to be burden if I stay alive. I can't even take care of self or get my own place. I'm too scared to function.
 
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T

Tomey

Member
Jan 23, 2019
34
Willow, You are so delicated soul and kind.
I feel bad that a girl like you need to leave this world :-(

I wish i could die with my mom holding me but it will never going to happen.

I don't want to die alone also.
I wish i could press a button and disappear from this world.

Probably i will die alone listening to radiohead in my bad...
 
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21Neberg

21Neberg

Enlightened
Dec 17, 2018
1,624
I'm am grateful for you all, I really am. For the first time in a long time, I don't feel crazy or alone. I don't feel judged or misunderstood. If there is a God, I hope he blesses all of you immensely. I love you all and don't even know you. I think tortured souls are the most tender and loving souls, It's irony really. We are so hard on our selves and gentle towards everyone else.

Beautiful words, and they're very true too. You can't spend your last moments with your parents but maybe you can tell them how much you love them before you go? Just because they're not there in your last moments you can spend time with them beforehand.
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
Willow, You are so delicated soul and kind.
I feel bad that a girl like you need to leave this world :-(

I wish i could die with my mom holding me but it will never going to happen.

I don't want to die alone also.
I wish i could press a button and disappear from this world.

Probably i will die alone listening to radiohead in my bad...
I'm sorry, you don't deserve that. But i understand at the same time. I hope you find peace one day Tomey, however you achieve it.
 
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ReadyasEver

ReadyasEver

Elementalist
Dec 6, 2018
828
I'm am grateful for you all, I really am. For the first time in a long time, I don't feel crazy or alone. I don't feel judged or misunderstood. If there is a God, I hope he blesses all of you immensely. I love you all and don't even know you. I think tortured souls are the most tender and loving souls, It's irony really. We are so hard on our selves and gentle towards everyone else.

This, so very well said.
 
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Macc Lad

Macc Lad

Specialist
Jan 22, 2019
300
My brain is just really fucked up! I'm going to be burden if I stay alive. I can't even take care of self or get my own place. I'm too scared to function.

:aw::aw:
 
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Feline

Feline

I am Purity, they call me Perverted.
Jan 24, 2019
61
Fuck Me Pumps, Take The Box, Help Yourself, In My Bed, Stronger Than Me, Tears Dry On Their Own, Wake Up Alone, You Know I'm No Good. (Sorry! Huge Amy fan!) xxxx

What's your favorite Amy song ?
 
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H

Heart Shards

The shards of my broken heart cut deep.
Feb 3, 2019
535
Fuck Me Pumps, Take The Box, Help Yourself, In My Bed, Stronger Than Me, Tears Dry On Their Own, Wake Up Alone, You Know I'm No Good. (Sorry! Huge Amy fan!) xxxx
seriously she was a genius! Why couldn't we lose Justin Bieber or One Direction instead? they are shitty anyways!
 
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Redt2go

Redt2go

flower child
Jan 5, 2019
1,643
Fuck Me Pumps, Take The Box, Help Yourself, In My Bed, Stronger Than Me, Tears Dry On Their Own, Wake Up Alone, You Know I'm No Good. (Sorry! Huge Amy fan!) xxxx
Same! She's my Prof pic lol
 
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Feline

Feline

I am Purity, they call me Perverted.
Jan 24, 2019
61
Fuck Me Pumps, Take The Box, Help Yourself, In My Bed, Stronger Than Me, Tears Dry On Their Own,

What's your favorite Amy song ?
 
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lululoo

lululoo

Mage
Dec 15, 2018
558
I don't think how you feel is strange at all. My mom has been a huge disappointment to me in life (didn't protect me from abusive father, for one)... yet even I kinda would want her there. It just seems so sad to have to do it alone.
 
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