Venting Replaced

[CoolGuy9]

Used to have a really good relationship with someone. I have always tried to make new friends, but I never found anyone I enjoyed talking to as much as I did with her. Quite often talking to her was the highlight of my day. She also helped me get a reason not to ctb after I lost a cat and after something bad happened in March.

Now this person has found someone and she barely has an interest in talking to me. Never starts the conversation and short replies. Known her for a couple of years and she only has known this new guy for about a month and im already basically fully replaced.

I just wish I had some actual fucking value. Like yeah, I can't just leave you, because there is no one like you. I want to be something special to someone. I want someone to consider me an improvement in their lives, but really I just make it worse.

I'm just writing what I feel atm. I may change my opinion later since my opinions are inconsistent.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

This is why you don't talk to people IRL.

 

[CoolGuy9]

This is why you don't talk to people IRL.

It was actually only online. Should probably have mentioned that since it's a big part of the story.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

It was actually only online. Should probably have mentioned that since it's a big part of the story.

All online women are actually men larping. You're lucky to be off the hook.

 

[Mistake of Nature]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm experiencing something similar and it's excruciating to know that a person doesn't value you the way you value them.

People will only disappoint you in the end. The best way to avoid this type of pain is to never let anyone in and never care about anyone. It'll lead to a lonely existence, but you won't ever have to lose anyone given that you never had them to begin with.

 

[toforigivelife]

I know this won't be a comfort to you but - what this specimen did to you does not mean that you have no value, it's a reflection of how she treats people.

If she is capable of simply discarding you after a couple of years then she is more than capable of discarding this new friend she has found.

From what you describe she may be a narcissist.

People who are unwell or depressed would find this painful but learn something from it and learn to watch for signs of her behavior as far as forming new relationships.

But for someone in your position being treated this way is devastating. I'd advise you to watch and see how she does this other people but right now you're probably wondering if you'll even live long enough to witness that.

I'm so sorry that this happened to. Being tossed aside like that is very painful.

But like I said, if she can do this to you she can do the same to this new guy and those that come after him. (And as time wears on and the more she loses her appeal she herself will become acquainted with the feeling of being discarded.)

 

[CoolGuy9]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm experiencing something similar and it's excruciating to know that a person doesn't value you the way you value them.

People will only disappoint you in the end. The best way to avoid this type of pain is to never let anyone in and never care about anyone. It'll lead to a lonely existence, but you won't ever have to lose anyone given that you never had them to begin with.

It is such a horrible feeling. I won't say this when I'm feeling more depressed, but now that I'm feeling a bit better since posting this thread, I don't think you should avoid people, because they can hurt you. Yeah stuff like this happens sometimes, but there is also the possibility of finding happiness in other people. I don't think most people can be happy without others and even though others sometimes bring pain, you should still try to form friendships.

I know this won't be a comfort to you but - what this specimen did to you does not mean that you have no value, it's a reflection of how she treats people.

If she is capable of simply discarding you after a couple of years then she is more than capable of discarding this new friend she has found.

From what you describe she may be a narcissist.

People who are unwell or depressed would find this painful but learn something from it and learn to watch for signs of her behavior as far as forming new relationships.

But for someone in your position being treated this way is devastating. I'd advise you to watch and see how she does this other people but right now you're probably wondering if you'll even live long enough to witness that.

I'm so sorry that this happened to. Being tossed aside like that is very painful.

But like I said, if she can do this to you she can do the same to this new guy and those that come after him. (And as time wears on and the more she loses her appeal she herself will become acquainted with the feeling of being discarded.)

This may sound a bit like Stockholm syndrome, but there is still a lot more to the story that I don't feel comfortable sharing and I fully admit that I'm not painting a perfect picture here. I just really needed to vent about how I felt and I feel a lot better now.

 

[BeyondGoodNEvil]

it seems to me you wanted more out of the friendship or not idk and she just happen to find someone else focuses more on her partner. it happens.
people just come on and go all my best friends have moved on rarley talk to them.
I think you just need to find a lover if ya wanna feel wanted and idk how youll do it but thats what you should aim for it anyway.just dont focus on one person too much expand

 

[CoolGuy9]

it seems to me you wanted more out of the friendship or not idk and she just happen to find someone else focuses more on her partner. it happens.
people just come on and go all my best friends have moved on rarley talk to them.
I think you just need to find a lover if ya wanna feel wanted and idk how youll do it but thats what you should aim for it anyway.just dont focus on one person too much expand

We kind of were more than just friends. I thought she still had romantic feelings for me, but apparently they were fading. I just wish I was something special for someone and that they wouldn't want to replace me, because there was no one like me on this planet.

 

[BeyondGoodNEvil]

We kind of were more than just friends. I thought she still had romantic feelings for me, but apparently they were fading. I just wish I was something special for someone and that they wouldn't want to replace me, because there was no one like me on this planet.

so like ye have dated before.

 

[CoolGuy9]

so like ye have dated before.

Kind of. We have never met irl so we never knew what titles should we use. At one point we did call each other bf and gf tho. I wish corona never happened, so we could actually have met. I was willing to fly to her country which for me was no small thing since I have no experience travelling like that and would probably get lost in some foreign country or something.

 

[WatermelonMel]

If it makes you feel better, you are not alone. This happens to me even with just regular friendships, they find a better friend or something they enjoy more and then

Never starts the conversation and short replies.