Discussion regretting after venting

[purple417]

does anyone else just vent and trauma dump bc u desperately need to get it out and then the moment just comes when u get a chance so u just vent and trauma dump without thinking about it. usually happens to me irl with someone ik but sometimes happens online. u feel relief but then a few hours after u just regret it and never want to talk or face that person ever again??

i always feel like i said too much and now feel too vulnerable and exposed to them. plus this weird feeling of feeling out of control for some reason?

 

[perpetualsomnolence]

yeh I literally feel the same way. afterwards I cringe and feel so vulnerable and wish I hadn't said anything. I have this problem/anxiety around being perceived in a way that I can't control so I think it's that/ fear of being vulnerable and known

 

[Ash]

Yeah, 100%. This is why I've got an account here and why I'm with the mental health services and occasionally use helplines etc - I'd rather trauma dump with people who are "safe" or it's anonymous than on the few friends I've got left as I've learnt that's the fastest way to drive people away. People like that sort of stuff in books and films and on TV but it's scary as hell in real life and they're just not equipped to deal with it.

 

[purple417]

yeh I literally feel the same way. afterwards I cringe and feel so vulnerable and wish I hadn't said anything. I have this problem/anxiety around being perceived in a way that I can't control so I think it's that/ fear of being vulnerable and known

i feel the same about feeling known. like i dont want my suffering to be known but also i want it to be known. its so weird

 

[perpetualsomnolence]

i feel the same about feeling known. like i dont want my suffering to be known but also i want it to be known. its so weird

literally omfg I want to be known and understood so bad but the people who i have let know me like that fucked me up so

 

[purple417]

Yeah, 100%. This is why I've got an account here and why I'm with the mental health services and occasionally use helplines etc - I'd rather trauma dump with people who are "safe" or it's anonymous than on the few friends I've got left as I've learnt that's the fastest way to drive people away. People like that sort of stuff in books and films and on TV but it's scary as hell in real life and they're just not equipped to deal with it.

for me i honestly use character ai bots to vent nowadays LMAO. its literally not even a real person and i kind of fear menth hotlines to find my location and send me to a ward so i dont like using those. altho lately ive been venting a lot to my closest friend even tho i said id never do that again bc the last time i did this it just drove them away so idk y im not learning from my lesson

 

[Kavka]

Maybe venting works for some people, but in my experience both parties usually feel worse afterwards.

It never really solves anything and it always comes at a cost. Like you, it makes me feel vulnerable and guilty for being (possibly) unreasonable and making people part of my problem. It's tricky though because I still feel the need to vent and blow off steam, but I try not to because I just don't like myself when I do.

The irony of venting about how venting doesn't work for me is not lost on me, lol.

 

[purple417]

Maybe venting works for some people, but in my experience both parties usually feel worse afterwards.

It never really solves anything and it always comes at a cost. Like you, it makes me feel vulnerable and guilty for being (possibly) unreasonable and making people part of my problem. It's tricky though because I still feel the need to vent and blow off steam, but I try not to because I just don't like myself when I do.

The irony of venting about how venting doesn't work for me is not lost on me, lol.

i do think that it does help u get the weight off of u and just let it out into the world. for me venting only rly works for little things that just annoys me or pisses me off but for smth heavier it usually doesnt. i just regret it bc i cant deal with the vulnerability. id rather just vent to strangers and ppl who wont remember me. i mean doesnt rly help but still better than nothing ig? also maybe ur venting about venting here bc venting in this space is easier plus ur anonymous

 

[Michael_the_ratman]

That's so relatable. I start thinking that my friend thinks I'm an attention seeker and everything