I'm going to try my best to do right by everyone around me and at least attempt to recover and this site unfortunately wouldn't be conducive to my recovery as I feel like I would be constantly looking at methods as backups in case I "failed" recovery. I feel like I owe the people who have loved and cared me for that even if I don't think that I deserve their love. I'm praying for each and every lost soul on here that circumstances in their life change so that they may live peaceful, fulfilled and happy lives and that they may turn to Christ when things get very hard or look near impossible. I am so sorry so many of you are suffering and feel there is no way out but know there is redemption in Him and casting your doubts and fears upon Him. It's what I do when I get really scared and while I'm still learning it helps to know someone's there who would never truly turn their backs on me. Please stay safe and take care of yourselves. You were all born with a purpose and you WILL find your spark again. Maybe it'll look vastly different than you expected maybe you'll have to completely start over like me but nonetheless I pray all your hard work pays off and you start to have more good than bad days.
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