NoLightRemains

NoLightRemains

I found my light again. Namu Amida Butsu
Sep 26, 2021
374
I just wanted to give this community an update since I have not been active in several months. I had a plan and everything prepared to CTB late April, but kept pushing it back to early July. I never really got that close to an attempt, as the survival instinct was too strong. I came to realize I didn't actually want to die, and my problems were more fixable than I once thought. My chronic migraines have improved with medical treatments, EMDR has helped symptoms of trauma, and my religion has changed my extremely pessimistic/angry worldview. I stopped using weed over three months ago. I moved in with a partner recently and am working on rebuilding my life slowly. I rarely have suicidal thoughts anymore, but when I do, they pass by very quickly.

I regret some of my posts here, namely anything that might be seen as encouragement of others taking their life or any information shared that could be used in a suicide plan.
If there is a way that moderators/admins could delete my old posts, I would be thankful. If that's not an option, I accept it, I just hope people really consider their options and whether there might be another way to keep on living.

May you all be at peace, may you all be free from suffering.
No Light Remains
 
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penguinl0v3s

penguinl0v3s

Wait for Me đź’™
Nov 1, 2023
799
Wow, nice! How did you treat your chronic migraines? I'm suffering with that myself. Also if you don't mind me asking, what religion are you? I am currently agnostic, but exploring spirituality.
 
L

losing hope

Arcanist
Apr 27, 2022
451
I just wanted to give this community an update since I have not been active in several months. I had a plan and everything prepared to CTB late April, but kept pushing it back to early July. I never really got that close to an attempt, as the survival instinct was too strong. I came to realize I didn't actually want to die, and my problems were more fixable than I once thought. My chronic migraines have improved with medical treatments, EMDR has helped symptoms of trauma, and my religion has changed my extremely pessimistic/angry worldview. I stopped using weed over three months ago. I moved in with a partner recently and am working on rebuilding my life slowly. I rarely have suicidal thoughts anymore, but when I do, they pass by very quickly.

I regret some of my posts here, namely anything that might be seen as encouragement of others taking their life or any information shared that could be used in a suicide plan.
If there is a way that moderators/admins could delete my old posts, I would be thankful. If that's not an option, I accept it, I just hope people really consider their options and whether there might be another way to keep on living.

May you all be at peace, may you all be free from suffering.
No Light Remains

Nice one mate. Are you able to advise how you quit weed? For Instance was it cold turkey?
 
NoLightRemains

NoLightRemains

I found my light again. Namu Amida Butsu
Sep 26, 2021
374
Wow, nice! How did you treat your chronic migraines? I'm suffering with that myself. Also if you don't mind me asking, what religion are you? I am currently agnostic, but exploring spirituality.
The migraine treatment was a long journey. I had to fail quite a few medications like triptans, anti convulsants, etc. before they let me use the more effective (but expensive) treatments. I found success with a CGRP inhibitor (a monthly injectable medication), but the real improvement was after the third session of botox. That really turned things around. I'm in-between medical providers right now and I likely will far behind on injections during the transition of care, but I am optimistic that even if things get bad, once I'm back on botox things will improve.

As far as religion, I would consider myself a Buddhist but haven't officially done any ceremonies to convert, that will probably be around May 2024. Very helpful teachings and path for me. I explored other faiths, but this is the path that spoke to me the most.
Nice one mate. Are you able to advise how you quit weed? For Instance was it cold turkey?
I tried to quit cold turkey a couple of times, but I would get really bad insomnia after 5-9 days and would cave. What I found most helpful was to taper to a small edible or bowl of vaped bud in the evening, versus being high all day on dab pen hits and edibles. I found the taper very helpful. It still wasn't super easy, but much more manageable after the couple months of reduced usage. I also tried to focus on the fact that any withdrawal effects were going to be temporary, and I will be better off in the future for it.

Best of luck with recovery/quitting weed!
 
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