Suicidebydeath
No chances to be happy - dead inside
- Nov 25, 2021
- 3,559
He's going to talk to me about my A&E visit and presumably the 4 or more emails I sent him. I'm running low on motivation reserves but I could force myself to write more before the appointment.
Everything points to that I have undiagnosed C-PTSD, and I've known about it for a long time but it's been impossible to get diagnosed or help for so far, this time I need to refuse to be talked out of it, not being diagnosed or being misdiagnosed and not getting medication is not helping me, I think. Being in a pseudo-relationship(but not hoping for more yet) and having strong friends to talk to about PTSD-related things are helping me. Since its my G.P. he can't diagnose me of those things probably, it's not in his jurisdiction, but I hope he can see at least that I have that.
My worst symptoms are physical ones right now, I can deal with all the emotional and other crap mostly, I've probably ignored it all for so long it barely affects me anymore.
Zero energy, insomnia(with sleep deprivation abuse I can't fix), anxiety, physical pain in that order of importance to me right now. Also weight-loss is important but fixing insomnia will help. Losing weight will make me infinitely happier as I'll proceed to the next stage of physical improvements after that.
If I get help with energy and insomnia than any other problems will be easier to deal with. The other problem is homelessness which I'm not worried about right now.
Thinking about three medications and that's only because people have told me they take them for (C)-PTSD, any other suggestions welcome:
Topiramate
Mirtazapine
Viorxetine
I need support or replies here even if its just telling me to write more emails before I go there. Or copy and pasting stuff and putting it in an email. I need to recovery as much as possible so I can take care of other suicidal people I know.
Why is the help tag red does that scare anyone away?
Everything points to that I have undiagnosed C-PTSD, and I've known about it for a long time but it's been impossible to get diagnosed or help for so far, this time I need to refuse to be talked out of it, not being diagnosed or being misdiagnosed and not getting medication is not helping me, I think. Being in a pseudo-relationship(but not hoping for more yet) and having strong friends to talk to about PTSD-related things are helping me. Since its my G.P. he can't diagnose me of those things probably, it's not in his jurisdiction, but I hope he can see at least that I have that.
My worst symptoms are physical ones right now, I can deal with all the emotional and other crap mostly, I've probably ignored it all for so long it barely affects me anymore.
Zero energy, insomnia(with sleep deprivation abuse I can't fix), anxiety, physical pain in that order of importance to me right now. Also weight-loss is important but fixing insomnia will help. Losing weight will make me infinitely happier as I'll proceed to the next stage of physical improvements after that.
If I get help with energy and insomnia than any other problems will be easier to deal with. The other problem is homelessness which I'm not worried about right now.
Thinking about three medications and that's only because people have told me they take them for (C)-PTSD, any other suggestions welcome:
Topiramate
Mirtazapine
Viorxetine
I need support or replies here even if its just telling me to write more emails before I go there. Or copy and pasting stuff and putting it in an email. I need to recovery as much as possible so I can take care of other suicidal people I know.
Why is the help tag red does that scare anyone away?
Last edited: