Venting Quit my job and going back to college

[heirofvoid]

I already quit my job and I was relieved at first since I hated it so much but now that I told my family that, they wanted me to go back and finish my studies. I initially wanted to find a job again first but they didn't agree with me. I couldn't really tell them the real reason why I resigned, I made up some bullshit about the salary and my uncle basically lectured me about it being normal. They still think I quit because the job is too hard so now they're thinking I won't be able to do anything with my life. I do kind of agree with that but honestly, the reason I quit is because I was losing myself. My job wasn't even good for my mental health. I couldn't really tell them that. I'm not really open to my family.

Now, I'm looking up how to go back to my previous college and it's filling me with anxiety. I never liked speaking in front of people and trying to prove myself to them. That's what I really hate about college but I have no other choice do I? If I don't get a degree I'm as good as nothing. I'm honestly so fucking scared. I wish I should've went through with my ctb but yea there's no concrete plan for that yet.

I'm checking out the courses in my previous college again and I can tell that I'll also hate it. I really wanted to take graphic design or mostly digital art/game related courses. No, I'm not getting into coding, I've tried that in highschool and I flunked it. The colleges/unis that offer the courses that I want have expensive tuition fees like it's fucking crazy. I'm fortunate enough to pass this state uni so it's REALLY cheap. I guess I'll just bear with this since it's cheaper for me and my family.

I just don't want to feel fear again. I can tell I'd be so fucking anxious when I go back to school again. If I flunk this one it's literally fucking over for me. I'll consider thinking of a good ctb plan since I kinda earned a bit from my previous job anyway.

 

[whywere]

Howdy!

Reading your thread is Deja vu. to/for me. At 18, I had to worry about food, shelter and the like not college and worked till I was 24. Then in 1980, I finally quit my job and went to college. It was one on the best things that I ever did. Yup, I am 67 and looking back I would do it all over again.

I was worried at first of not only the grades aspect but fitting in with a little bit of a younger crowd. BUT, after I got in the grove, I was fine.

I mentioned the prior aspects, because you will do wonderful and being a little scared is ok, as it shows that you want to do good work in school and that you are taking it seriously, fantastic!

Dollars to donuts, someday you will look back at your decision and it will bring a huge smile to you.

Sending you lots of huge hugs, caring thoughts and the knowledge you are an intelligent soul.

Walter